Song info
"Good Advice" Videos
Lyrics
+Good Advice
I know a man named Otis who invented a room,
And his heart was filled with pride.
I said to Mr. Otis, "What does your room do?"
He said, "It goes from side to side."
So I said, "Mr. Otis, if you take my advice,
You'll be the richest man in town.
You gotta take that room that goes from side to side,
And make it go up and down."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
I sincerely doubt
That the world could do without
My good advice.
Sir Isaac Newton came around to my house one day.
His face was all sunburned and red.
He said he didn't want to sleep in the shade of a tree,
Because an apple might fall on his head.
I said, "Sir Isaac, you dumbbell, take my advice.
Go right back there and sleep beneath that tree.
And if you let that rotten apple fall down on your head,
Why you'll discover gravity."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
The world's a better place,
Since I gave the human race
My good advice.
A man named Mr. Waterman invented a tube.
He was sad because it sprung a little leak.
He said, "Darn it, when I hold my tube on a piece of paper,
The ink leaks out and makes a little streak."
He said, "I've gotta find a way to stop that leak.
I'll start working on my leakproof tube again."
I said, "Waterman, you idiot, don't stop that leak.
You just invented a fountain pen."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
I'm so worldly wise,
I should get the Nobel Prize,
For good advice.
Good old Henry Ford, he was a hardworking man.
He worked all night and all day.
I said, "Henry, watcha doin'?"
And Henry, he said, "I'm inventing the Chevrolet."
He said, "I've already built twenty-five models,
One for each letter from A to Z."
I said, "Henry, you fool, there are twenty-six letters in the alphabet.
He said, "Good heavens, I forgot the Model T."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
It's fruitful as can be,
And it's absolutely free.
My good advice.
Wilbur and Orville were two brothers named Wright.
The nicest pair of kids you've ever seen.
They worked twelve years on a secret project.
They thought it was a washing machine.
I said, "Fellas, what are all those wings for?"
They said, "For hanging clothes out to dry."
I said, "You fools, take that washing machine out to Kitty Hawk,
And see if the darn thing'll fly."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
I'm so smart that I'm
Gonna win a Guggenheim,
For good advice.
(One more time)
Benjamin Franklin was a charming old man,
He was always flying his kite.
One night I said, "Benjy, why ain't you out with your kite?"
He said, "Because it's raining tonight."
I said, "Benjy, sweety, you go right back out there,
And to your kite string tie a key.
This may shock you, Benjy my boy,
But that's electricity."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
I'll be fond of you
If you'll only listen to
My good advice.
Ooga Magoog was a Neanderthal man,
A very poorly educated soul.
He had a great big square thing made of solid stone,
And in the middle of it was a hole.
One day he had to go from his cave in Natchez
To his uncle's cave in Mobile.
I said, "Round off those corners
And buy a set of tires,
And Ooky baby, that's a wheel."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
Harvard offered me
A Phi Beta Kappa key
For good advice.
Sigmund Freud, he had an unfurnished house.
He was a very nosy fellow, so it seems.
He had no chairs,
So he made all his friends stand around all day,
And tell him all their secrets and their dreams.
Well, while they stood there talking 'till they got fallen arches,
They yelled, "My feet are killing me. Ouch!"
I said, "Sigmund, don't you realize you've got a gold mine here.
Go out and buy yourself a leather couch."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
Every word you're told
Will be 18 karat gold,
That's good advice.
Alexander Graham Bell was building a fence
With some wood, and a long piece of wire.
He said, "There's something strange going on around here.
I keep hearing the voice of Uncle Myer."
I said, "Mr. Graham Cracker," (that was my little joke)
"With that wire you got the world in your palm.
Just get a mouthpiece, and an earpiece, and a piece in between,
And you'll sponsor The Telephone Hour."
And that was good advice, good advice.
Good advice costs nothing, and it's worth the price.
Every word ya hear
Is the message of the year,
It's good advice.
Christopher Columbus was a seaman second class
When I told him that the Indies could be found
By sailing to the West instead of sailing to the East.
I advised him that I thought the world was round.
(I really thought so.)
And then I sent him down to ask good Queen Isabella
To pawn her jewels for all their worth.
Next day he set sail, and as everyone knows,
He fell off the edge of the Earth.
And that was bad advice, bad advice.
Bad advice is just the same as good advice.
Everybody makes
Occasional mistakes,
And that was bad advice.
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Đăng lời dịchAlbums has song "Good Advice"
Singles
58 songs
- The Laarge Daark Aardvark Song 2006
- Shticks Of One Kind And Half A Dozen Of The Other 2006
- You Went The Wrong Way Old King Louie 2006
- Grow Mrs Goldfarb Grow 2006
- Hail To Thee Fat Person 2006
- The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas 2006
- Strange Things In My Soup 2006
- Harvey And Sheila 2006
- Beautiful Teamsters 2006
- Plan Ahead 2006
- Barry Is The Babys Name 2006
- Automation 2006
- Eight Foot Two Solid Blue 2006
- Holiday For States 2006
- No Ones Perfect 2006
- Pills 2006
- The Dropouts March 2006
- Your Mothers Here To Stay 2006
- Lotsa Luck 2006
- The Drinking Man's Diet 2006
- Signs 2006
- Good Advice 2006
- Green Stamps 2006
- Headaches 2006
- Secret Code 2006
- It's A Most Unusual Play 2006
- An Average Song 2006
- My Aunt Minnie 2006
- You Need An Analyst 2006
- J C Cohen 2006
- Heres To The Crabgrass 2006
- My Son, The Vampire 2006
- Hungarian Goulash No 5 2006
- The Bronx Bird Watcher 2006
- Kiss Of Myer 2006
- Mexican Hat Dance 2006
- Chim Chim Cheree 2006
- Pop Hates The Beatles 2006
- The Painless Dentist Song 2006
- Hello Muddah Hello Fadduh 2006
- That Old Back Scratcher 2006
- Ride Of Paul Revere 2006
- Wont You Come Home Disraeli 2006
- Al N Yetta 2006
- Rat Fink 2006
- Americas A Nice Italian Name 2006
- If I Were A Tishman 2006
- The Lets All Call Up Att And Protest To The President March 2006
- I Cant Dance 2006
- When I Was A Lad 2006
- There's No Governor Like Our New Governor 2006
- Spanish Flea 2006
- Westchester Hadassah 2006
- Little Butterball 2006
- Turn Back The Clock 2006
- Youre Getting To Be A Rabbit With Me 2006
- One Hippopotami 2006
- Shine On Harvey Bloom 2006
Singles
116 songs
- The Laarge Daark Aardvark Song 2006
- Strange Things In My Soup 2006
- You Went The Wrong Way Old King Louie 2006
- Al N Yetta 2006
- Harvey And Sheila 2006
- Shticks Of One Kind And Half A Dozen Of The Other 2006
- You Went The Wrong Way Old King Louie 2006
- The Laarge Daark Aardvark Song 2006
- Holiday For States 2006
- Grow Mrs Goldfarb Grow 2006
- The Dropouts March 2006
- Hungarian Goulash No 5 2006
- Hello Muddah Hello Fadduh 2006
- Hail To Thee Fat Person 2006
- The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas 2006
- Strange Things In My Soup 2006
- Harvey And Sheila 2006
- Kiss Of Myer 2006
- Mexican Hat Dance 2006
- Chim Chim Cheree 2006
- Pop Hates The Beatles 2006
- The Painless Dentist Song 2006
- Hello Muddah Hello Fadduh 2006
- That Old Back Scratcher 2006
- Ride Of Paul Revere 2006
- Wont You Come Home Disraeli 2006
- Al N Yetta 2006
- Rat Fink 2006
- Americas A Nice Italian Name 2006
- The Bronx Bird Watcher 2006
- The Lets All Call Up Att And Protest To The President March 2006
- I Cant Dance 2006
- When I Was A Lad 2006
- There's No Governor Like Our New Governor 2006
- Spanish Flea 2006
- Westchester Hadassah 2006
- Little Butterball 2006
- Turn Back The Clock 2006
- Youre Getting To Be A Rabbit With Me 2006
- One Hippopotami 2006
- Shine On Harvey Bloom 2006
- If I Were A Tishman 2006
- Plan Ahead 2006
- The Drinking Man's Diet 2006
- Lotsa Luck 2006
- Your Mothers Here To Stay 2006
- The Dropouts March 2006
- Pills 2006
- No Ones Perfect 2006
- Holiday For States 2006
- Eight Foot Two Solid Blue 2006
- Automation 2006
- Barry Is The Babys Name 2006
- Beautiful Teamsters 2006
- Good Advice 2006
- Green Stamps 2006
- Headaches 2006
- Secret Code 2006
- It's A Most Unusual Play 2006
- An Average Song 2006
- My Aunt Minnie 2006
- You Need An Analyst 2006
- J C Cohen 2006
- Heres To The Crabgrass 2006
- My Son, The Vampire 2006
- Hungarian Goulash No 5 2006
- Signs 2006
- Mexican Hat Dance 2006
- Hail To Thee Fat Person 2006
- Grow Mrs Goldfarb Grow 2006
- Headaches 2006
- My Son, The Vampire 2006
- Secret Code 2006
- The Bronx Bird Watcher 2006
- Heres To The Crabgrass 2006
- J C Cohen 2006
- Green Stamps 2006
- Good Advice 2006
- An Average Song 2006
- Chim Chim Cheree 2006
- It's A Most Unusual Play 2006
- The Drinking Man's Diet 2006
- That Old Back Scratcher 2006
- Beautiful Teamsters 2006
- The Painless Dentist Song 2006
- Americas A Nice Italian Name 2006
- Barry Is The Babys Name 2006
- Eight Foot Two Solid Blue 2006
- Automation 2006
- I Cant Dance 2006
- Little Butterball 2006
- Kiss Of Myer 2006
- My Aunt Minnie 2006
- You Need An Analyst 2006
- Signs 2006
- Your Mothers Here To Stay 2006
- The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas 2006
- Spanish Flea 2006
- Westchester Hadassah 2006
- There's No Governor Like Our New Governor 2006
- Turn Back The Clock 2006
- If I Were A Tishman 2006
- Shticks Of One Kind And Half A Dozen Of The Other 2006
- When I Was A Lad 2006
- Wont You Come Home Disraeli 2006
- Plan Ahead 2006
- No Ones Perfect 2006
- One Hippopotami 2006
- Lotsa Luck 2006
- Rat Fink 2006
- Pop Hates The Beatles 2006
- Pills 2006
- Ride Of Paul Revere 2006
- Shine On Harvey Bloom 2006
- The Lets All Call Up Att And Protest To The President March 2006
- Youre Getting To Be A Rabbit With Me 2006
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