My Band

I don't know dude
I think everyone's all jealous and shit 'cuz I'm like the lead singer of a band dude
And I think everyone's got a fucking problem with me dude
And they need to take it up with me after the show

Because these chicks don't even know the name of my band
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands
'Cuz once I blow they know that I'll be the man
All because I'm the lead singer of my band

So I get off stage right and drop the mic
Walk up to the hot chicks and I'm all like
"'Sup ladies, my name's Slim Shady
I'm the lead singer in D12 baby"
They're all like "Oh my god it's him"
"Becky, oh my fuckin' god it's Eminem"
"I swear to fucking god dude you fuckin' rock"
"Please Marshall, please let me suck your cock"
And by now the rest of the fellas get jealous
Especially when I drop the beat and do my acapellas
All the chicks start yellin',
All the hot babes throw their bras, and their shirt, and their panties on stage
So like every single night they pick a fight with me
But when we fight it's kinda like sibling rivalry
'Cuz they're back on stage the next night with me
Dude I just think you're tryna' steal the light from me
Yesterday Kuniva tried to pull a knife on me
Cause I told him Jessica Alba's my wife to be
This rock star shit, it's the life for me
And all the other guys just despise me

Because these chicks don't even know the name of my band
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands
'Cuz once I blow they know that I'll be the man
All because I'm the lead singer of my band

You just wanna see a nigga backwards don't you
Hey dad how come we don't rap on Protools
Smash these vocals and do a performance
But we in the van and he in a tour bus
You don't want my autograph, you's a liar
And no I'm Swift (oh I thought you was Kuniva)
What the hell is wrong with that dressing room
'Cuz my shit is looking smaller than a decimal
See I know how to rap, see it's simple
But, all I did was read a Russell Simmons book
So I'm more intact, tryna' get on the map
Doin' jumping jacks whilin' get whipped on my back

Kuniva and Kon Artist]
Look at Em little punk ass thinkin' he the shit
Yeah I know man find himself taking on a flick
Hey, I thought we had an interview with DJ Clue
([Em:] No I had an interview not you two)
You gonna be late for soundcheck
Man, I ain't goin' to soundcheck
But our mics are screwed up, and his always sound best
You know what, man I'ma say something
Hey, yo Em
(You got something to say?)
Man, no
I thought you bout to tell him off, what's up?
Man, I'ma tell him when I feel like it, man shut up
And you ain't even back me up when we s'posed to be crew
When I was bout to talk right after you
I swear, I swear man

These chicks don't even know the name of my band
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands
'Cuz once I blow they know that I'll be the man
All because I'm the lead singer of my band

They say the lead singers rock, but the group does not
Once we sold out arenas to the amusement park
I'm gonna let the world know that proof is hot
I should cut his mic off when the musics starts
Ready to snap on a dumb ass fan
Every time I hear, "Hey dude, I love your band"
We ain't a band, bitch we don't play instruments
So why he get 90 and we only get 10 percent
And these guys, they can find every area code
([Em:] Proof carry my bag)
Bitch carry your own
Can't make it to the stage, security in my way
(Who the fuck are you? Where's Obie and Dre?)

Goddammit, I'm sick of this group
Time for me to go solo and make some loot
I told you I made the beats and wrote all the raps
'Till Kon Artist slipped me some crack
Lose Yourself video, I was in the back
Superman video, I was in the back
Fuck the media, I got some suggestions
Fuck Marshall, ask us the questions
Like who's D12, how we get started
(But what about Eminem?)
Bitch, are you retarded?
Anyway I'm the popularest guy in the group
Big ass stomach, bitches think I'm cute (hey sexy)
50 told me to do situps to get buff
I did two and a half, and then I couldn't get up
Fuck D12, I'm outta this band
I'm gonna start a group with the real Roxanne

Girl, why can't you see you're the only one for me
And it just tears my ass apart to know that you don't know my name

[Chorus - Bizarre]
These chicks don't even know the name of my band (Ha ha)
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands (Fuck Marshall)
'Cuz once I blow I know that I'll be the man
All because I'm the lead singer of my band
My Band
Roxanne
Shatan
Loves me

The hottest boy band in the world
D12!
[Eminem as a salsa singer]
I'm the lead singer of my band
I get all the girls to take off their underpants
And the lead singer of my band
My salsa makes all the pretty girl's wan' to dance my salsa
Look out for my next single, it's called My Salsa
My salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, my salsa
My salsa makes all the pretty girls wan' to dance
And take off their underpants
My salsa makes all the pretty girls wan' to dance
And take off their underpants, my salsa
Where'd everybody go?