Living In A Pet Shop

By Roger Brown

I GOT UP TODAY AND I TOOK A LOOK AROUND,
I WAS LIVING IN A PET SHOP.
LIVING THIS LIFE IS REALLY GETTING ME DOWN,
LIVING IN A PET SHOP.

ALL OF THIS NOISE AND ALL OF THIS CLATTER,
ALL DAY LONG WE JUST CHAT, CHAT, CHATTER.
OH, WHAT A LIFE, WILL IT EVER STOP?
LIVING IN A PET SHOP.

Aum -

I'VE BEEN HERE, IT'S ALL I EVER HAVE KNOWN,
LIVING IN A PET SHOP.
ALL I EVER WANTED WAS A HOME OF MY OWN
BUT I'M LIVING IN A PET SHOP.

YOU MIGHT SAY WE'RE A LITTLE OVERCROWDED, (meow-)
CHOCK-A-BLOC BUNNIES, THERE'S NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.
OH, WHAT A LIFE, WILL IT EVER STOP?
LIVING IN A PET SHOP.

COME ON, PEOPLE, WON'T SOMEBODY TRY ME?
I'M A NICE FELLOW, WON'T SOMEBODY BUY ME?

Aum -
Aum - (animal scat sing)

I GOT UP TODAY AND I TOOK A LOOK AROUND,
I WAS LIVING IN A PET SHOP.
LIVING THIS LIFE IS REALLY GETTING ME DOWN,
LIVING IN A PET SHOP.

(Meow -)
IF I STAY HERE MY HEART IS GONNA BREAK ME, (meow -)
IF YOU'RE GOING MY WAY, WON'T YOU, PLEASE, TAKE ME?
OH, WHAT A LIFE, WILL IT EVER STOP?
LIVING IN A PET SHOP,
LIVING IN A PET SHOP.

(Oh, what a life will it ever stop - aum-meow-)
(Oh, what a life will it ever stop - aum-meow-)
(Oh, what a life will it ever stop - aum-meow-)
(Oh, what a life will it ever stop - aum-meow-)
(Arf! Arf! Arf!...)

DIALOG:

"I SHALL BE BOUGHT BY SOMEONE RICH AND FAMOUS. I SHALL LIVE IN A GOLDEN CAGE IN A GREAT HOUSE." SAID THE WITH MOUSE TO A BUDGERIGAR. THEY WERE SITTING IN A WINDOW OF A PET SHOP IN LIVERPOOL. THEY SPOKE A LANGUAGE CALLED ANIMO WHICH NO HUMAN BEING CAN UNDERSTAND. ALL THE DOGS AND CATS, BIRDS AND FISH SPOKE ANIMO.
A LITTLE BOY CAME INTO THE SHOP.
"I'M LOOKING FOR A MOUSE." THE BOY BOUGHT THE MOUSE.
THE MOUSE OPENED HIS EYES IN A HOUSE IN LIVERPOOL. HE WAS IN A CAGE. PEOPLE WERE TALKING ABOUT HIM, HE COULDN'T' UNDERSTAND THEM. AT THIS TIME HE COULD SPEAK ONLY ANIMO.
"I MUST LEARN THIS LANGUAGE," THOUGHT THE MOUSE, "IF I'M TO GET ANYWHERE AT ALL."

"HEY, YOU LOT! COME AND GET YOUR SCOUSE!" SHOUTED MOTHER. SCOUSE IS A KIND OF STEW MADE IN LIVERPOOL. "HERE YOU ARE, MOUSE, HAVE A BIT OF SCOUSE, YOU'RE A LIVERPOOL MOUSE SO YOU SHOULD EAT SCOUSE. HEY! THAT'S WHAT I'LL CALL HIM, SCOUSE THE MOUSE!"
THE FATHER SWITCHED ON THE TELEVISION.
"TERRIFIC!"
SCOUSE THE MOUSE HAD DISCOVERED TELEVISION. HE WATCHED EVERYTHING. HE WATCHED THE ROCK GROUPS. SCOUSE'S FAVORITE GROUP WAS CALLED THE JOLLIES. THEY WERE A MUSICAL FAMILY.