You Saw My Blinker

This is a story I'll never forget
About the day my new car got hit
It caught me off guard 'cause it happened so quick
When I heard the crash I got mad as hell

Cruising down the highway fast not slow
Ninety miles an hour in my five point o
People waving at me 'cause they know who I am
Alpine stereo blasting a jam

"Put the top down" said my girlfriend
Then my damn hat blew off in the wind
I got kind of mad 'cause it's the hat I just bought
I should of put her out it was all her fault

Day was Friday, date was the tenth
My girl was looking good on her strength
She smacked my hand when I put it on her knee
I said, "Hit me again and I'll break your wrist"

That day I dressed all in white
Taking my girl to Palm Springs for the night
I was hoping I could find a short cut
I was tired plus I had a rash on my butt

There was this lady in a Pinto coupe
About ninety years old I could tell by the droop
Driving all fast, border line insane
Glasses so thick, couldn't stay in her lane

I swerved left and I swerved right
But she was still tailgating me too damn tight
To the left lane I tried to switch then
You saw my blinker bitch

We both pulled off on the side of the road
I was hot ready to explode
The only thing stopping me from breaking her nose
Was I was 21 and she was ninety years old

Then the police came turned the lights off
The lady started crying and the cop got soft
The cop said, "Oh it'll be okay"
Wrinkled old bag looking like a sharpei

I said, "Wait what's going on cop
Her cars fine, my car is wrecked"
Then I saw what happened in the crash
Her dentures came out got stuck in the dash

You hit me, I didn't hit you
Stop holding your neck, lady you can't sue
It's your fault, you caused all this
You saw my blinker bitch

Wednesday, October the fourth
That's when we got our day in court
That lady destroyed my case
When she came in a wheelchair and a neck brace

I jumped up I said, "You must be joking
Come on judge, her neck ain't broken
Well I'll be damned
Wrinkled old bag started crying on the stand"

The bailiff grabbed me slammed me on the ground
Judge said, "Boy you better come down
Aren't you one of them damn rap singers"
Yeah, then I gave him the finger

Judge held me contempt of court
For giving him the finger and things of that sort
Anything to say before you're dismissed
Just one "You saw my blinker bitch"