"V is for Valentine..... No Vodka"

Remember those butterflies we felt in our stomach?
I drowned mine in opiates & Vodka.
it was 4am, February 14, I couldn't take it anymore.
I drank bottle after bottle, trying to forget you but it never worked.
Alcohol burns my throat, but your name hurts my head.
&I'd rather be hungover than stare blankly at my hands,
Trying to remember the way your love felt.
I search for you at the bottom of each & every bottle.
& in the ashes of my cigarettes, but you're gone so why do I even bother?

You called me your princess. But I Don't think a princess has nicotine & stomach acid on her breath,
Or gambles her soul in a game of texas hol 'em with Death.
So don't tell me I'm beautiful,
Until you've seen me at 4am on the bathroom floor,
Drowning in vodka, & tears.
Trying to purge out these last few years.
We were both addicted. But baby I was just another pack of cigarettes,
& you were the finest Heroine.

SO I'll just keep wasting my breath on a menthol,
Instead of wasting it on you.
There's no difference between you two at all,
when both drugs kill.
I'll rub the ember out on my skin.
Because it feels the same way it did,
Every time you layed in my bed.
In the end, My name was the only one I forgot.
Bottle after Bottle, Till I can say
"I love you not."