Lifeboats

I just want to feel alive
And love myself
From the in and the outside

'Cause every time
That I start to feel whole
I knock myself on the ground
Because it's all that I've known

Just like the streets
Burn a hole through your shoe
My soul has been worn out too
I'm 25 and I still don't fit in
Directionless, like a blind man painting

Mother, I'm so sorry
I can't go on like this
The lifeboats are leaving
With or without me

What's the point of falling in love?
If I don't love myself
What's the point of being alive
If all I want is out

So I thought that it only feels right
To make the seizures they danger my mind
Lay late at night on the black and blue moons
I question the reasons that I self-abuse

I'm so pathetic, it makes me sick
I'm a fingerless pianist
I see reflections, I clench my fists
I'm a violin without the strings

Mother, I'm so sorry
I can't go on like this
The lifeboats are leaving
With or without me

What's the point of falling in love?
If I don't love myself
What's the point of being alive
If all I want is out

There is no love, there's only this
Just lust and lies and selfishness
A black hole where the sun once was
I'm never falling back in love
'Cause it has never been enough

This is that pity
Of playing once with love
Now that I've become a man
The feeling's grown

The therapy and through the pills
I can't let go
But what about the fuckin' fact
I'm still alone

What do you do when you got nothing left?
Give up, give up and hope for the best
I throw it in the ocean I and have to sit
Waiting on a nameless rescue ship

What do you do when you got nothing left?
Give up, give up and hope for the best
I throw it in the ocean, I and have to sit
Waiting on a nameless rescue ship

Mother, I'm so sorry
I can't go on like this
The lifeboats are leaving
With or without me

What's the point of falling in love?
If I don't love myself
What's the point of being alive
If all I want is out