Luyện nghe bài hát I'm An Asshole

Folks, I'd like to sing a song about the American
me, about you, the way our American hearts beat
Down in the bottom of our chests, about the feeling

We get in the cockles of our hearts, maybe the cockles
Maybe in the area, maybe in the liver
Maybe in the kidneys, maybe even in the colon, we know

I'm a regular Joe with a regular job
I'm your average white suburbanite
I football and porno and books about war

I've got an average house a nice hardwood floor
My wife and my job, my and my car
My feet on my and a Cuban cigar

But that just ain't enough
To keep a man like me
(Oh no)
No way
(Uh-uh)

No, gotta go out and have fun
At someone else's
(Oh yeah)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

I really slow in the ultrafast lane
While people me are going insane

I'm an
(He's an asshole, an asshole)
I'm an
(He's an asshole, an asshole)

I use public toilets and piss on the
I walk in the summertime saying
"How about heat?"

I'm an
(He's an asshole, an asshole)
I'm an
(He's the world's asshole)

Sometimes I park in handicapped
handicapped people make handicapped faces

I'm an
(He's an asshole, an asshole)
I'm an
(He's a fucking asshole)

Maybe I be singing this song
and raving and carrying on
Maybe they're right when they tell me I'm

Nah!

I'm an
(He's an asshole, an asshole)
I'm an
(He's the biggest asshole)

You know I'm gonna do?
I'm get myself a 1967 Cadillac, El Dorado convertible
Hot pink with whaleskin hub and all leather cow interior
And big brown baby seal eyes for headlights,
And I'm gonna drive in that baby at 115 mph

Getting one mile per gallon, sucking down quarter
Cheese burgers McDonald's in the old fashioned
Non-biodegradable containers
And when I'm done sucking down grease ball burgers

I'm gonna wipe my mouth with the American
And I'm gonna toss the Styrofoam container right out the side
And there a goddamned thing anybody can do about it
You why? Because we got the bombs, that's why

Two words, fucking weapons, okay?
Russia, Germany,
They can have all the they want
can have a big democracy cake walk
Right the middle of Tienanmen square

And it won't make a of difference
Because we've got the bombs, John Wayne's not dead
He's frozen and as soon as we find the cure for
We're gonna thaw out the duke and he's gonna be pissed off
You why? Have you ever taken a cold shower?

Well multiple that by 15 times
how pissed off the Duke's gonna be
I'm gonna get the Duke and John

(Hey)
And Lee
(Hey)
And Sam
(Hey)
And a case of whiskey and down to Texas
(Hey, you you really are an asshole)
Why don't you just and sing the song pal

I'm an
(He's an asshole, an asshole)
I'm an
(He's the biggest asshole)

A S S H O L E,
A S S H O L E

Arf arf arf arf arf arf arf
achng tum a fung tum a fling chum
Ooh, ooh

I'm an asshole and of it