Luyện nghe bài hát Cousin Earl

Now you wanna talk bladder problems
Then the man you wanna talk to will probably be my Earl

I guess you all Earl
He lives out on Route 13 out on that maggot
Earl don't like it you get his maggot farm
Confused a worm farm
A farm is for worms and a maggot farm is for maggots

And Earl's got the biggest maggots in the state, feet long
Of course, now believes this might be due to the fact that
St. Medical Facility
Has been dumping waste on his property

Interesting thing about three-foot maggots is
That, well, one day the china
And the next day his television disappeared
And then a few after that his '57 Chevy disappeared
But they are the world's biggest maggots

Anyway one day Earl and I standin' in the kitchen
Giant maggots crawlin' the floor
And turns to me and he says

"Do you go to make a pork sausage
And find it's got hairs all over it?"
And he gives me a look still chills me to this day

Now Earl's got a son and they call him Junior
Which I think is clever since he is Earl's son
not really a normal boy
Ever since that accident

Anyway, he ran up $5,000 of 976 phone bills
He weird, unnatural numbers like 976-PIGG with two G's
And 976-SHEEP, which has five in it
I know a sick boy

Earl suggested that well, I talk to him
So I went his bedroom and I sat him down
But before I say a word Earl Junior looked at me and he said

"Didja ever go to make a pork
And find it's got hairs all it?"
And he gave me a look that chills me to this day

Now, Earl's got a daughter and they call her
And Effie-Sue, she don't look so much like a girl
As she looks a, a big pile of fungus
blames this too on the fact that
St. Smithen's Medical Facility has been dumpin' on his maggot

And I never had contact with Essie, Effie-Sue
Excuse me, I don't even think that much of her to get her right
I never had contact with her
She just just sits on the couch
Like a little ball of and just boils away

Well, one day, she at me
And that little ball of fungus its mouth
(Or what I guess was its I'd hate to think what else it could be)
And out of that orifice the words

"Didja ever go to make a, a pork
And it's got hair all over it?"
And then that, that pile of fungus
Gave me a look that me to this day

Now Earl's got a and we call her wife, we don't know her name
Because she's never really said that
For the longest time we she could only say two words
Which were 'Dog' and 'Pussy', we thought that 'Dog' and 'Cat'

But then we found out
she was really trying to say was "Dog-pussy"
One big hyphenated word which doesn't come up in conversation
Especially Baptists
We never her say anything other than that

You know she works at
Down at St. Smithen's Facility and Pork Sausage Distillery
Got a good paying job there she only does say those
Well that one

And we have her say another thing once
But that was a long time ago we were sittin' the house
And she at me and she said

"Do you ever go to make a sausage
And find that it's got growin' all over it?"
And she gave me a look that chills me to day

Now one day Earl took his whole family fishin' in Miller's Creek
He took his wife who could say, "Dog-pussy"
He took his son Junior who took the day off from calling
976 - barnyard
And he took that little that little of fungus daughter
of his along with him

They all got in a boat and they started fishing
Now St. Smithen's Medical and Pork Sausage Distillery
Has been known to dump their stuff into Creek
All sorts of heinous stuff, big floatin' in the creek
With little things on them say
'St. Smithen's Medical Facility and Pork Distillery'

Anyway was fishing
And he a wall-eyed bass which had twenty-seven eyes on it
It was a twenty-seven-eyed wall-eyed
Earl looked at it, and decided, "Umm, wouldn't this be to eat"

So he took out his to cut it open
But that looked up at him and it said
"Please, please don't eat me"
And said, "But I'm hungry I'm hungry"

"I work on a maggot
My wife can say 'Dog-pussy'
My daughter is a pile of
My son spent all of his college money calling numbers
I to eat you"

And that said, "Please, don't eat me, mister, please"
And he said, "I have to I to"
So the said, "Alright then, if you're gonna cut me open
Let me ask you one question"

ever go to eat a pork sausage
And find it's got growin' all over it?"

And then all eyes stared back at Earl
And they stared back at his wife who could say, 'Dog-pussy'
And they stared at his weird 976 - animal-calling son
And they stared back at little pile of pus
That passes for Earl's

And they gave them a
All twenty-seven eyes gave them a
A look that they will not forget until this day
Oh, man