Better Than This

I'm sorry
I wanted to be
So much better than this,
But I don't think I can
I say these words to keep your body
Close to my heart.

I know you're gone, but I still miss you all the time.
I say I'm fine but I can't keep you from my mind.
You knew the worst of me.
You loved the things I hated in myself.
You saw my greatest fears.
You sat with me those sixteen years,

When I hated my self, and hated you
For loving me all the same.
Please look away.
But now, I've grown,
And moved away from home;
I keep my problems to myself,

Because you taught me that strength
Wasn't building good support,
But rather needing nothing of the sort.
I keep steadfast in faith not to the world,
But to your voice drilling deep inside my head.
I've known the worst of this.

I've cut off everyone,
Because you taught me that's how a man
Should be.
I'm sorry
I wanted to be

So much better than this,
But I don't think I can
I say these words to keep your body
Close to my heart.
I know you're gone, but I still miss you all the time.
I say I'm fine but I can't keep you from my mind.
I wanted to be so much better
But I'm not.