1] She was on her way to a college graduate Wouldn't even stop to to the average kid The of latina I'd sit and contemplate marriage with Fuck the horse and carriage shit, her was never for hire Disciplined, intellectual beauty's I desire Flyer than Salma or Jennifer Lopez Everyone told me, it to her was hopeless At first I just thought, she mess with broke kids The thug niggaz always about, how they smoke kids But the rich-sniff-coke got no play "I'm not even interested" is what her language would say Everyone around the way, up trying to get in it It didn't matter how good your game was, she with it All the block bitches was jealous, but wouldn't it Talk shit, and to everyone that they did it 'Cause regreted the long list of niggaz that they let hit it And no one ever gave them shit except McDonald's and Smoking weed with thoughts of envy, whenever lit it She spoke and they bit it, always trying to copy But when they tried to use her vocab, they sounded She had a style, all her own, respectful and I was in the head for her, and there wasn't a cure
- Jean Grae] Don't you know that, waits for no man And our fate, it's all I'm blessed just to you To have loved and have lost, just to hold you all find, a reason why God came, you and I If I had the again, I'd never let you go Hold tight to love, 'cause you never know
2] Her eyes are and beautiful, yet empty and sad I used to to her occasionally, and she was glad I wasn't just another nigga trying to get in it So every now and we'd stop and talk for a minute I didn't have a so the minutes turned to hours On her birthday, I her a poem with flowers Then I took her out to after her cousin's baby shower We talked about, power to the people and We spent more together but it was never enough I never tried to sneak a touch, or even cop a I was too interested, in it real Perfectly honest and complete, she would call me "carino," And never Technique, bought me a new to read every 2 or 3 weeks changing the expression of my thoughts when I speak It was of her, I even deaded all of my freaks She convinced me, to hangin' out on the streets To stop robbin' and stealin', from people you I took her out to the Apollo and the Bronx Zoo, Museo del and the Metropolitan too Got to the where I was either with her or my crew So I decided one day, to tell her my feelings was I couldn't live without her so I told her, facing my But honey's only response, was a face of tears She only sob hysterically, holding me tight I tried to speak, but she wouldn't stop until I sight I felt like a moth who got too close to the light Except I didn't burn, I turned after that night
3] I went on with my life, college and my Ended up locked up an animal for a year Where the C.O.'s to you like they were the overseer Then I got sent to the hole, when my exit was At night in my cell, I'd my eyes and I'd see her Hold her close in my dreams, but when I she disappeared Just an empty cell until the gave me parole In the summer, came back, in tact and on But the of the matter, is I still felt cold Even after my mother, me, cryin' at home My real niggaz catch me thinkin', out of my zone Fuckin' lots of different women, but I felt alone Relatively around the New York underground But I kept thinking of her and how we used to be The sound of her voice, and the smell of her hair Though gone physically, it was still there I had to do something, because the shit was too to bear So I and visited the building where she used to live The world looks a lot different you do a bid Your way of life changed primitive minds are still stuck in the same game Like her cousin who was on the corner slangin' Stepped in the lobby and tapped the button to her last name Her mom buzzed me up and me up, like a mother oughta But her facial expression changed, when I asked about her
4] She told me that there was a for me, that was left behind She had it there waiting, for such a long time I was inclined to ask it but she brought it up first I saw a tear swelling up in her eye, and then she She told me where the letter was and I thinking the worst Reversed my position, stepped over and opened the And sure enough there was an with my name on the floor "Nobody loves you than me carino" is what the letter said
"By the time you get to read this, I'll be dead But you left in '97 a part of me went to Heaven I God at least I got to know what love really was But it hurt me, to see what true really does 'Cause even though we never love, you were all that there was It was because I loved you so much I had to make you leave You made me doubt the way I thought, you made me to believe And I slipped up, and I let you get close to me It was hard to not be openly when people to me This was not the way I my life was supposed to be don't you see, I had a blood transfusion that left me with HIV Hope didn't for me since late in 1993 I died a virgin, I wish I could've given to you I cried in the hospital because was no one else but you Promise that you'll me in paradise inevitably No matter what, I'll keep love forever with me"
happened for the rest of the day is still a blur But I wishing that I was dead, instead of her She was buried on 3rd The story ends a sequel And now you know why Technique, don't fucking fall in love people Hold the that you love closely if they're next to you The one you love, not the person that has sex with you Appreciate them to the extent, and then beyond you never really know what you got, until it's gone