1] She was on her way to becoming a graduate even stop to talk to the average kid The of latina I'd sit and contemplate marriage with Fuck the horse and shit, her love was never for hire Disciplined, intellectual beauty's I desire Flyer than Salma or Jennifer Lopez Everyone told me, kickin' it to her was At first I thought, she didn't mess with broke kids The thug niggaz always talking about, how they kids But the rich-sniff-coke kids got no "I'm not interested" is what her body language would say Everyone the way, gave up trying to get in it It didn't matter how good your was, she wasn't with it All the block bitches was jealous, but admit it Talk shit, and to everyone that they did it 'Cause they the long list of niggaz that they let hit it And no one ever them shit except McDonald's and did-dick Smoking weed thoughts of envy, whenever they lit it She spoke intelligently and they bit it, always to copy But when they to use her vocab, they sounded sloppy She had a style, all her own, and pure I was in the head for her, and there wasn't a cure
- Jean Grae] Don't you know that, time for no man And our fate, it's all I'm blessed just to you To have loved and have lost, to hold you all night Can't find, a why God came, you and I If I had the chance again, I'd let you go Hold tight to your love, 'cause you never
2] Her are brown and beautiful, yet empty and sad I to talk to her occasionally, and she was glad That I just another nigga trying to get in it So now and then we'd stop and talk for a minute I didn't have a gimmick so the minutes turned to On her birthday, I her a poem with flowers I took her out to dinner after her cousin's baby shower We talked about, power to the people and We spent more together but it was never enough I never tried to sneak a touch, or even cop a I was too interested, in keeping it Perfectly honest and complete, she always call me "carino," And never Technique, bought me a new book to read every 2 or 3 Forever changing the expression of my when I speak It was of her, I even deaded all of my freaks She convinced me, to stop out on the streets To stop robbin' and stealin', from people you Instead I took her out to the and the Bronx Zoo, Museo del and the Metropolitan too Got to the point I was either with her or my crew So I one day, to tell her my feelings was true I couldn't live without her so I told her, facing my But honey's only response, was a face full of She only sob hysterically, holding me tight I tried to speak, but she wouldn't until I left sight I felt a moth who got himself too close to the light Except I didn't burn, I turned cold after night
3] I on with my life, college and my career Ended up up like an animal for a year Where the C.O.'s talk to you like they the overseer Then I got sent to the hole, when my exit was At night in my cell, I'd close my and I'd see her Hold her close in my dreams, but I woke she disappeared Just an empty cell until the state me parole In the summer, came back, in and on track But the fact of the matter, is I still cold after my mother, hugged me, cryin' at home My real would catch me thinkin', out of my zone Fuckin' lots of different women, but I still alone Relatively well-known around the New underground But I kept thinking of her and how we to be down The sound of her voice, and the smell of her hair Though physically, somehow it was still there I had to do something, the shit was too much to bear So I went and visited the building where she used to The world looks a lot different you do a bid Your way of done changed While primitive minds are still in the same game Like her cousin who was on the corner cocaine in the lobby and tapped the button next to her last name Her mom buzzed me up and hugged me up, a mother oughta But her facial expression changed, when I asked about her
4] She told me that there was a note for me, was left behind She had left it there waiting, for such a time I was inclined to ask about it but she brought it up I saw a tear swelling up in her eye, and then she She told me where the letter was and I thinking the worst my position, stepped over and opened the door And sure enough there was an envelope my name on the floor "Nobody loves you more than me carino" is what the letter
"By the time you get to read this, I'll be dead But when you left in '97 a part of me went to I thank God at least I got to know love really was But it hurt me, to see what true love does 'Cause even we never made love, you were all that there was It was because I loved you so much that I had to make you You made me the way I thought, you made me want to believe And then I up, and I let you get close to me It was hard to not be when people spoke to me This was not the way I thought my life was to be Baby don't you see, I had a blood transfusion that me with HIV Hope didn't exist for me since in 1993 I died a virgin, I wish I could've given to you I in the hospital because there was no one else but you that you'll meet me in paradise inevitably No matter what, I'll keep your forever with me"
What happened for the rest of the day is still a But I wishing that I was dead, instead of her She was on August 3rd The ends without a sequel And now you know why Technique, don't fucking fall in love people Hold the that you love closely if they're next to you The one you love, not the person that simply has sex you Appreciate them to the extent, and then beyond 'Cause you never really what you got, until it's gone