Well, ya got trouble, my friend, here, I say, trouble right here in City. Why I'm a billiard player, Certainly proud I say I'm always proud to say it. I that the hours I spend a cue in my hand are golden. Help you cultivate horse And a cool head and a eye. Did ya ever take and try to An iron-clad leave to a three-rail billiard shot? But as I say, It takes judgement, brains, and to score In a line game, I say that any kin take And a ball in a pocket. And call that sloth. The first big on the road To the of deg-ra-Day-- I say, first, medicinal wine a teaspoon, Then from a bottle. An' the next ya know, Your son is playin' for In a suit. And list'nin to big out-a-town Jasper Hearin' him about horse-race gamblin'. Not a wholesome race, no! But a race where they set down on the horse! Like to see some jockey'boy Sittin' on Dan Patch? Make your boil? Well, I say. Friends, let me tell you I mean. You got one, two, three, four, five, six in a table. that mark the diff'rence Between a and a bum, With a "B," And that rhymes with "P" and stands for pool! And all week long River City Youth'll be away, I say your young be frittern! Frittern away their noontime, suppertime, too! Get the in the pocket, Never mind gittin' pulled Or the screen patched or the beefsteak pounded. mind pumpin' any water 'Til parents are caught with the Cistern empty On a Saturday and that's trouble, Oh, yes we got lots and a' trouble. I'm thinkin' of the in the knickerbockers, Shirt-tail ones, peekin' in the pool Hall window school, ya got trouble, folks! here in River City. Trouble with a "T" And rhymes with "P" and that stands for pool! Now, I know all you are the right kinda parents. I'm be perfectly frank. Would ya like to what kinda conversation goes On while they're loafin' around that They're tryin' out Bevo, out cubebs, out Tailor Mades like Cigarette Fiends! And all about How they're gonna cover up a tell-tale with Sen-Sen. One fine night, they the pool hall, for the dance at the Arm'ry! Libertine men and women! And Rag-time, music That'll grab your son and daughter With the arms of a jungle instinct! Mass-steria! Friends, the idle brain is the playground!
Trouble, oh we got trouble, Right here in City! With a "T" That rhymes "P" And that for Pool, stands for pool. We've got trouble! here in River City, here! Gotta out a way To keep the young moral after school! Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble...
Mothers of City! Heed that warning it's too late! Watch for the tell-tale of corruption! The your son leaves the house, he rebuckle his knickerbockers below the knee? Is there a nicotine on his index finger? A novel hidden in the corn crib? Is he starting to jokes from Capt. Billy's Bang? Are certain words creeping into his like, like 'swell?" And your old man?" Well, if so my friends, Ya got trouble, here in River city! With a "T" And that rhymes "P" And that for Pool. We've got trouble! Right here in City! the Maine, Plymouth Rock and the Golden Rule! Oh, got trouble. in terrible, terrible trouble. That game with the fifteen numbered is a devil's tool! Oh yes we got trouble, trouble, trouble! With a "T"! rhyme it with "P"! And stands for Pool!!!