Well, ya got trouble, my friend, here, I say, trouble right in River City. Why sure I'm a player, mighty proud I say I'm mighty proud to say it. I consider the hours I spend With a cue in my are golden. Help you cultivate sense And a cool and a keen eye. Did ya take and try to give An iron-clad leave to From a three-rail billiard But as I say, It takes judgement, brains, and to score In a baulk game, I say that any boob kin And a ball in a pocket. And they that sloth. The big step on the road To the of deg-ra-Day-- I say, first, wine from a teaspoon, beer from a bottle. An' the thing ya know, Your son is playin' for In a suit. And list'nin to some big Jasper Hearin' him about horse-race gamblin'. Not a trottin' race, no! But a race where set down right on the horse! Like to see stuck-up jockey'boy Sittin' on Dan Patch? Make your boil? Well, I say. Friends, let me you what I mean. You got one, two, three, four, five, six in a table. Pockets that the diff'rence a gentlemen and a bum, With a "B," And that rhymes with "P" and stands for pool! And all week your River City be frittern away, I say young men'll be frittern! Frittern away their noontime, suppertime, too! Get the in the pocket, Never mind Dandelions pulled Or the door patched or the beefsteak pounded. mind pumpin' any water 'Til your parents are caught the Cistern empty On a Saturday night and trouble, Oh, yes we got lots and a' trouble. I'm of the kids in the knickerbockers, Shirt-tail ones, peekin' in the pool Hall window school, ya got trouble, folks! Right here in City. Trouble a capital "T" And that rhymes with "P" and that for pool! Now, I know all you folks are the right parents. I'm gonna be frank. Would ya like to know what kinda conversation On while they're around that Hall? tryin' out Bevo, tryin' out cubebs, Tryin' out Mades like Cigarette Fiends! And all about How they're gonna up a tell-tale breath with Sen-Sen. One night, they leave the pool hall, for the dance at the Arm'ry! Libertine men and women! And Rag-time, music That'll grab your son and your With the of a jungle animal instinct! Mass-steria! Friends, the brain is the devil's playground!
Trouble, oh we got trouble, Right here in City! With a "T" That rhymes "P" And that for Pool, stands for pool. We've got trouble! Right here in City, here! Gotta out a way To the young ones moral after school! Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble...
Mothers of City! Heed that warning before too late! for the tell-tale sign of corruption! The minute your son the house, he rebuckle his knickerbockers below the knee? Is there a nicotine on his index finger? A dime novel hidden in the crib? Is he starting to memorize jokes Capt. Whiz Bang? Are certain words creeping into his Words like, 'swell?" And your old man?" Well, if so my friends, Ya got trouble, Right in River city! a capital "T" And that with "P" And stands for Pool. surely got trouble! Right in River City! the Maine, Plymouth Rock and the Golden Rule! Oh, got trouble. We're in terrible, trouble. game with the fifteen numbered balls is a devil's tool! Oh yes we got trouble, trouble, trouble! With a "T"! Gotta it with "P"! And stands for Pool!!!