Luyện nghe bài hát Words of Wisdom

Tom: I'm going to back and I'm going to start a therapeutic massage center only for for...
Mark: I'm to start my own nudist colony
Tom: That would be grose, you tried in our bus one time
Mark: I tried to start our own nudist colony in our bus and it was much just me hanging out naked, they love you Tom
They love me so fuck everybody else
Mark: Yea fuck all you guys out there that are cheering, yea we hate you Tom you suck burn in hell
Tom: Yea fuck that, hey I say I say fuck the hating Tom that's what I say, are we ready Mark
Mark: You what it is you know what it is a lot of these people are just now hopping on the we hate Tom bandwagon, like I've been hating tom since like 1995 I'm old school hating Tom guy alright
Tom: Oh shit, hey let's all say some dirty words, everybody say fuck, everybody say shit, everyone say dick, say Mark's an ass hole
Mark: Everyone say, everyone say we Mark, yea
Hey now let's do this one, everyone say fuck fuck shit fuck, that's the kind of words you should be using at home kids
Mark: That's
What do we do now
Mark: I want everyone to call me an ass hole
What's up I like your hair it's very nice
Mark: You like his hair oh cool thanks he probably that a lot
Tom: I wanted to say I your but but I thought that was to foward you know
Mark: Hey this song is for all the ladies in the hezouse, hea he it's for all the ladies in the heoueoueouze
Mark!
Mark:
Tom: Shut the up
Mark: It's for all the ladies in the houaeiouze, weee. Hey you know what hang on I want to this like a
(belch) exuse me
Mark: Tom
Sorry
Mark: I to make this like a big golf tournimant everyone shut up everybody just clap like it's a golf tourniment
Tom: That's what it sounds like when I get done having sex, 15,000 people cheering me on, I could take all of you in my bed right fucking now, but you're not invited Mark. You have got giant and I doubt you're 18, do you have a note from your mom, I want to meet your mom...
Mark: Hey put those 13 year old boobs away, if I wanted to see 13 year old boobs I'd out by the Junior high like my dad like my dad does
Tom: Hey you know what I in fifth grade
Mark: What's that your dad has a weiner
Tom: My dad's was bigger than mine then and still is
Mark: I want everyone to scream, fuck you Tom,we fucking hate you you're going to burn in hell and die a horrible firery death cause' we hate you stupid pieces of shit
Tom: I heard
Thanks
Tom: You want to give me your shirt, this smells like blood and feces, time ok what does this say here
Mark: It smells blood and feces, so it's your dad's shirt
Tom: Hey uh just like every other band we believe in a safe of sex don't we Mark, that we do so Mark's going to tell you about how safe we are
Mark: Let me tell you about the safest form of sex, it's when you get super drunk and you have sex with like ten people totally unprotected and you do drugs at the same time, no it's not true
Tom: It's not you have to carry a weapon. How many of you guys have girlfreinds and how many of your girlfriends have guy friends, I hope you're not having sex
Mark: And more importanly how many of your have girlfriends
Tom: we believe in the love that exists between two vaginas
Mark: The special kind of love of all is the love that exists between two naked women while I watch
We need her to put her shirt back on
Mark:
Tom: It just took away my boner, my boner died, I had one and now it's gone
Mark: Please I saw your boobs and my wiener ran away. Hey hey hang on everyone everyone seriously I need your attention for just a second please, I think somebody lost a contact down here so everyone look a contact lense hey someone lost a contact lense so uh...
Tom: I lost my
Mark: an I out for it
Tom: I lost a testacle, hey what if testacles were things you could lose on a everyday basis that would suck, you've got three, hey I've got to go pee pee
Mark: Do you want to go pee and I'll talk to the kids for a
Tom: Do you think you can talk for time
No uh uh
Tom: Why don't you gather thoughts
Mark: Why don't you just wet pants and we'll call it even
Tom: Should I just piss in my pants right here, if you guys all pitch in a dollar each I'll piss my pants right here now, that should pay me about bucks maybe
I'll give you three-hundred dollars to piss your pants right now
Tom: I'll give you four-hundred bucks to eat my
Sold
Tom: Sold, apparently there's a kid that's hurt right now and I they're helping them out right now, it looks like they're right there
Mark: Make a hole people make a
All you people over there make way for the hurt kid and bring me their wallet
Mark: I now you know let me tell you guys something...
I'm gay!
Mark: There's thousands and thousands of people here there's like semis and fucking buses and multiple bands and all kinds of shit, I wish now I would have taken bass lessons, sorry sorry
So do I, I wish you did too
Mark: I'm thinking for this year I'm going to ask for lessons
Tom: I know a guy, he has sex with his sister, he his dick to pop her four foot blister, and I know it's not that cool, he fucked her in my swimming pool, he's got three testacles, and he loves to do shit, fuck yea. Hey how come every time we say a joke it has to be about fucking sex masturbation insest, or anything grose like that you know
Mark: Is there anything in the world
Tom: nothing else to talk about
Mark: Hey can you help that little girl out of there she's not having so much fun now, hey
Tom: Uh exuse me, guard sir
Mark: The one right in of you, yea
Tom: Yea that girl right there to come out, if you're a small person the front is not the best view, and if you hate seeing shitty bands any of this is not a good view, this whole everything every seat here. Mark's middle name is Rebecca, they thought he was a...
Mark: That's right, my middle names Rebecca my dad wanted a girl, he treats me like one
Tom: I still have to go pee and I'm holding it in still, piss my pants though for money, I'll eat a nugget of my own poop for twenty bucks, I'll pay you twenty bucks and I'll eat it
Mark: You your ass
Tom: You have hair on nothing but your balls, has no hair on his whole body but a fucking wolverine growning in his pants, I swear to God, it's got teeth and shit
Mark: It's
He's got a scary looking penis
Mark: It's true I need your tax deductable donations for the shave Mark's balls program,
Tom: for charity kids
Please send what you can, donate your time
Tom: You guys think that we're touring for our own, no this is a charity tour for balls
Mark: trying to raise enough money to shave my nuts, please give generously
Tom: There's no metal strong enough to be the teeth on any kind of electric shaver, what do we do now, oh I need a new
Mark: We need a new guitar, we need a new guitarist, any one out play guitar
Tom: Does anybody know how to play guitar cause' I'm not very good, people really respect me
Mark: If I were a girl, every I went to the gynecologist, I'd fake an orgasm
Tom: Bad
Bad christmas spirit
Tom: Bad christmas
Mark: Hey ok I light now
Tom: We're going to point out every single person that didn't
Mark: Santa Claus is going to come to your and shit under all your trees
Tom: Santa Claus is going to come rape your dogs, Oh God you know what I'm kind of ashamed of being myself today, and yesterday and the day before that, not really pround of who I am or how I look. Any one have one of days were you don't even really like what you're wearing, you know, you don't like how your hair looks, and kind of bumed about how your penis is so small and bent and wierd. That is the ugliest but I have ever seen. Let's hear it for not wiping! And this guy fuck wiping dude, brings down the rain forest. Ok this is a song I wrote...
Mark: That guy has a science project up his ass
Tom: Uh what head's up seven up, everyone close your eyes and if I by and if I come by and put my finger in you but than you're the one.
I think that Satan has a couple of
Well kids it's been a really fun show, and I want you all to know that we'll come back soon, but before I go I want to say I think Tom is extemely good looking and all the girls out there should think he's good looking. Tom has one of the best butts that I've ever seen, shimi shimi coco puff shimi shimi shimi shimi coco puff. Does anybody here want to sleep with me. I'm really a nice guy, it's really not Satan...
It's me it's not Satan let's all be happy he's not here say Satan

I'm out of jokes and out of songs, I think we're done.