Luyện nghe bài hát Words of Wisdom

Tom: I'm going to come back and I'm going to start a therapeutic center only for for...
Mark: I'm going to start my own nudist
That would be grose, you tried that in our bus one time
Mark: I tried to start our own nudist in our bus and it was pretty much just me hanging out naked, they love you Tom
Tom: love me so fuck everybody else
Mark: Yea all you guys out there that are cheering, yea we hate you Tom you suck dick burn in hell
Tom: Yea fuck that, hey I say I say fuck the hating Tom thing that's what I say, are we ready
Mark: You know what it is you know what it is a lot of these people are just now hopping on the we Tom bandwagon, like I've been hating tom since like 1995 I'm old school hating Tom guy alright
Tom: Oh shit, hey let's all say dirty words, everybody say fuck, everybody say shit, everyone say dick, everyone say Mark's an ass hole
Mark: Everyone say, everyone say we Mark, yea
Tom: Hey now let's do this one, everyone say fuck shit fuck, that's the kind of words you should be using at home kids
Mark: right
What do we do now
Mark: I want to call me an ass hole again
What's up I like your hair it's very nice
Mark: You like his hair oh cool thanks he appreciates that a lot
Tom: I wanted to say I your but but I thought that was to foward you know
Hey this next song is for all the ladies in the hezouse, hea he it's for all the ladies in the heoueoueouze
Mark!
Mark:
Tom: Shut the up
Mark: It's for all the in the houaeiouze, weee. Hey you know what hang on I want to make this like a
(belch) exuse me
Mark: Tom
Sorry
Mark: I want to make this like a big golf tournimant everyone shut up everybody just clap it's a golf tourniment
Tom: That's what it sounds like when I get done having sex, 15,000 people cheering me on, I could take all of you in my bed right now, but you're not invited Mark. You have got giant boobs and I doubt you're 18, do you have a note from your mom, I want to meet your mom...
Mark: Hey put those 13 year old boobs away, if I wanted to see 13 old boobs I'd hang out by the Junior high like my dad like my dad does
Tom: Hey you what I learned in fifth grade
Mark: What's your dad has a bent weiner
Tom: My dad's weiner was than mine then and still is
Mark: I want everyone here to scream, fuck you Tom,we fucking hate you you're going to burn in hell and die a horrible firery death we hate you stupid pieces of shit
I heard that
Mark:
Tom: You want to give me shirt, this smells like blood and feces, dinner time ok what does this say here
Mark: It like blood and feces, so it's your dad's shirt
Tom: Hey uh just like every band we believe in a safe form of sex don't we Mark, that we do so Mark's going to tell you about how safe we are
Mark: Let me you about the safest form of sex, it's when you get super drunk and you have sex with like ten people totally unprotected and you do intravenous drugs at the same time, no it's not true
Tom: It's not you have to carry a weapon. How many of you guys have girlfreinds and how many of your girlfriends have guy friends, I hope you're not having sex
And more importanly how many of your girlfriends have girlfriends
Tom: Cause' we in the love that exists between two vaginas
Mark: The most special kind of love of all is the love exists between two naked women while I watch
We need her to put her shirt back on
Mark:
Tom: It took away my boner, my boner just died, I had one and now it's gone
Mark: I saw your boobs and my wiener ran away. Hey hey hang on everyone everyone seriously I need your attention for just a second please, I think somebody lost a contact down here so everyone look around a contact lense hey someone lost a contact lense so uh...
I lost my virinity
Mark: an I out for it
Tom: I lost a testacle, hey what if testacles were things you could lose on a everyday that would suck, you've only got three, hey I've got to go pee pee
Mark: Do you want to go pee and I'll talk to the for a second
Do you think you can talk for enough time
No uh uh
Tom: Why don't you gather thoughts
Mark: Why don't you just wet your and we'll call it even
Tom: Should I just piss in my pants right here, if you all pitch in a dollar each I'll piss my pants right here now, that should pay me about two-hundred bucks maybe
Mark: I'll give you three-hundred dollars to piss your pants now
I'll give you four-hundred bucks to eat my shit
Mark:
Tom: Sold, apparently a kid that's hurt right now and I think they're helping them out right now, it looks like they're right there
Mark: Make a hole make a hole
Tom: All you people over make way for the hurt kid and bring me their wallet
Mark: I now you know let me tell you guys something...
I'm gay!
Mark: There's thousands and thousands of people here today there's like semis and fucking buses and bands and all kinds of shit, I wish now I would have taken bass lessons, sorry sorry
Tom: So do I, I you did too
Mark: I'm thinking for Christmas this I'm going to ask for lessons
Tom: I know a guy, he has sex with his sister, he his dick to pop her four foot blister, and I know it's not that cool, he fucked her in my swimming pool, he's got three testacles, and he loves to do shit, fuck yea. Hey how come every time we say a joke it has to be about fucking sex masturbation insest, or anything grose like that you know
Mark: Is there anything else in the
Tom: nothing else to talk about
Mark: Hey can you that little girl out of there she's not having so much fun right now, hey
Uh exuse me, security guard sir
Mark: The one in front of you, yea
Tom: Yea that girl right there needs to come out, if you're a small the front is not the best view, and if you hate seeing shitty bands any of this is not a good view, this whole everything every seat here. Mark's middle name is Rebecca, they thought he was a...
Mark: That's right, my middle names Rebecca because my dad a girl, he treats me like one
Tom: I still have to go pee and I'm holding it in still, I'll piss my pants though for money, I'll eat a nugget of my own poop for bucks, I'll pay you twenty bucks and I'll eat it
You shave your ass
Tom: You have hair on nothing but your balls, Mark has no hair on his whole body but a fucking wolverine growning in his pants, I to God, it's got teeth and shit
Mark: It's
Tom: He's got a looking penis
Mark: It's true I your tax deductable donations for the shave Mark's balls program, please
Tom: for charity kids
Mark: send what you can, donate your time
Tom: You guys think that we're for our own, no this is a charity tour for Mark's balls
We're trying to raise enough money to shave my nuts, please give generously
Tom: There's no strong enough to be the teeth on any kind of electric shaver, what do we do now, oh I need a new guitar
Mark: We a new guitar, we need a new guitarist, any one out there play guitar
Tom: Does anybody know how to guitar cause' I'm not very good, people don't really respect me
If I were a girl, every time I went to the gynecologist, I'd fake an orgasm
Tom: Bad
Mark: Bad spirit
Tom: Bad christmas
Mark: Hey ok I need now
Tom: We're going to out every single person that didn't sing
Mark: Santa Claus is going to to your house and shit under all your trees
Tom: Santa Claus is going to come rape your dogs, Oh God you know what I'm kind of ashamed of being myself today, and yesterday and the day before that, not really pround of who I am or how I look. Any one have one of those days were you don't even really like what you're wearing, you know, you don't like how your hair looks, and kind of bumed about how your penis is so and bent and wierd. That is the ugliest but I have ever seen. Let's hear it for not wiping! And this guy fuck wiping dude, brings down the rain forest. Ok this is a song I wrote...
That guy has a science fair project up his ass
Tom: Uh what head's up seven up, everyone close your and if I come by and if I come by and put my finger in you but than you're the one.
I think Satan has a couple of comments:
Well kids it's been a really fun show, and I want you all to know that we'll come back soon, but before I go I want to say I think Tom is extemely good looking and all the girls out there should think he's good looking. Tom has one of the best butts that I've ever seen, shimi shimi coco puff shimi right shimi shimi coco puff. Does anybody here want to sleep with me. I'm really a nice guy, it's really not Satan...
It's me it's not Satan let's all be happy he's not here say Satan

Alright I'm out of jokes and out of songs, I we're done.