Luyện nghe bài hát Words of Wisdom

Tom: I'm going to back and I'm going to start a therapeutic massage center only for for...
Mark: I'm going to my own nudist colony
Tom: That would be grose, you tried in our bus one time
Mark: I tried to start our own nudist colony in our bus and it was pretty much just me hanging out naked, love you Tom
Tom: They love me so fuck everybody
Mark: Yea fuck all you guys out that are cheering, yea we hate you Tom you suck dick burn in hell
Tom: Yea fuck that, hey I say I say fuck the hating Tom thing that's what I say, are we Mark
Mark: You know what it is you know what it is a lot of these people are just now hopping on the we hate Tom bandwagon, like been hating tom since like 1995 I'm old school hating Tom guy alright
Tom: Oh shit, hey let's all say some dirty words, everybody say fuck, everybody say shit, everyone say dick, everyone say an ass hole
Everyone say, everyone say we hate Mark, yea
Tom: Hey now let's do this one, everyone say fuck fuck shit fuck, that's the of words you should be using at home kids
That's right
Tom: do we do now
Mark: I want everyone to call me an ass again
Tom: What's up I your hair it's very nice
Mark: You like his hair oh cool thanks he appreciates that a lot
Tom: I wanted to say I liked but but I thought that was to foward you know
Mark: Hey this next song is for all the ladies in the hezouse, hea he it's for all the ladies in the
Mark!
Mark:
Tom: the fuck up
Mark: It's for all the ladies in the houaeiouze, weee. Hey you know what hang on I want to this like a
(belch) exuse me
Mark: Tom
Sorry
Mark: I want to make this like a big golf tournimant everyone shut up everybody just clap like a golf tourniment
Tom: That's what it sounds like I get done having sex, 15,000 people cheering me on, I could take all of you in my bed right fucking now, but you're not invited Mark. You have got giant boobs and I doubt you're 18, do you have a note from your mom, I want to meet your mom...
Mark: Hey put those 13 year old away, if I wanted to see 13 year old boobs I'd hang out by the Junior high like my dad like my dad does
Tom: Hey you know what I learned in grade
Mark: that your dad has a bent weiner
My dad's weiner was bigger than mine then and still is
Mark: I want everyone here to scream, fuck you Tom,we fucking hate you you're going to in hell and die a horrible firery death cause' we hate you stupid pieces of shit
Tom: I that
Thanks
Tom: You want to give me shirt, this smells like blood and feces, dinner time ok what does this say here
It smells like blood and feces, so it's your dad's shirt
Tom: Hey uh just like every other band we believe in a safe form of sex we Mark, that we do so Mark's going to tell you about how safe we are
Mark: Let me tell you the safest form of sex, it's when you get super drunk and you have sex with like ten people totally unprotected and you do intravenous drugs at the same time, no it's not true
Tom: It's not true you have to carry a weapon. How many of you guys have girlfreinds and how many of your girlfriends have guy friends, I hope not having sex
Mark: And more importanly how of your girlfriends have girlfriends
Tom: Cause' we believe in the that exists between two vaginas
Mark: The special kind of love of all is the love that exists between two naked women while I watch
We need her to put her shirt back on
Mark:
Tom: It just took away my boner, my boner just died, I had one and now it's
Mark: Please I saw your boobs and my ran away. Hey hey hang on everyone everyone seriously I need your attention for just a second please, I think somebody lost a contact down here so everyone look around a contact lense hey someone lost a contact lense so uh...
I lost my virinity
Mark: an I out for it
Tom: I lost a testacle, hey what if testacles were things you could lose on a everyday basis that would suck, you've got three, hey I've got to go pee pee
Do you want to go pee and I'll talk to the kids for a second
Tom: Do you think you can talk for time
No uh uh
Tom: Why don't you your thoughts
Mark: Why don't you just wet pants and we'll call it even
Tom: Should I just piss in my pants right here, if you guys all pitch in a dollar each piss my pants right here now, that should pay me about two-hundred bucks maybe
I'll give you three-hundred dollars to piss your pants right now
Tom: give you four-hundred bucks to eat my shit
Mark:
Tom: Sold, apparently there's a kid that's hurt now and I think they're helping them out right now, it looks like they're right there
Mark: Make a hole people a hole
Tom: All you people over make way for the hurt kid and bring me their wallet
Mark: I wish now you know let me tell you something...
I'm gay!
Mark: There's thousands and thousands of people here today like semis and fucking buses and multiple bands and all kinds of shit, I wish now I would have taken bass lessons, sorry sorry
Tom: So do I, I you did too
Mark: I'm thinking for Christmas this year I'm going to ask for
I know a guy, he has sex with his sister, he used his dick to pop her four foot blister, and I know it's not that cool, he fucked her in my swimming pool, he's got three testacles, and he loves to do shit, fuck yea. Hey how come every time we say a joke it has to be about fucking sex masturbation insest, or anything grose like that you know
Mark: Is there anything in the world
Tom: There's nothing else to talk
Mark: Hey can you that little girl out of there she's not having so much fun right now, hey
Tom: Uh exuse me, guard sir
Mark: The one right in of you, yea
Tom: Yea that girl right there needs to come out, if you're a small person the front is not the best view, and if you hate seeing shitty bands any of this is not a good view, whole everything every seat here. Mark's middle name is Rebecca, they thought he was a...
Mark: That's right, my middle Rebecca because my dad wanted a girl, he treats me like one
Tom: I still have to go pee and I'm holding it in still, I'll piss my pants though for money, I'll eat a nugget of my own poop for bucks, I'll pay you twenty bucks and I'll eat it
Mark: You shave ass
Tom: You have hair on nothing but your balls, Mark has no hair on his whole body but a fucking wolverine in his pants, I swear to God, it's got teeth and shit
It's true
Tom: got a scary looking penis
It's true I need your tax deductable donations for the shave Mark's balls program, please
Tom: It's for charity
Mark: Please send what you can, donate your
Tom: You guys think that touring for our own, no this is a charity tour for Mark's balls
Mark: We're trying to raise money to shave my nuts, please give generously
Tom: There's no metal strong enough to be the teeth on any of electric shaver, what do we do now, oh I need a new guitar
Mark: We a new guitar, we need a new guitarist, any one out there play guitar
Tom: Does anybody know how to play guitar cause' I'm not very good, don't really respect me
Mark: If I were a girl, every time I to the gynecologist, I'd fake an orgasm
Bad kids
Mark: Bad christmas
Bad christmas spirit
Mark: Hey ok I light now
We're going to point out every single person that didn't sing
Mark: Santa Claus is going to come to your house and under all your trees
Tom: Santa Claus is going to come rape your dogs, Oh God you know what I'm kind of ashamed of being myself today, and yesterday and the day before that, not really pround of who I am or how I look. Any one have one of those days were you don't even really like what you're wearing, you know, you don't like how your hair looks, and kind of bumed about how your penis is so small and bent and wierd. That is the ugliest but I have ever seen. Let's hear it for not wiping! And this guy fuck wiping dude, brings down the forest. Ok this is a song I wrote...
That guy has a science fair project up his ass
Tom: Uh what head's up seven up, everyone close your eyes and if I come by and if I come by and put my in you but than you're the one.
I think that Satan has a couple of
Well kids it's been a really fun show, and I want you all to know that we'll come back soon, but before I go I want to say I think Tom is extemely good looking and all the girls out there should think he's looking. Tom has one of the best butts that I've ever seen, shimi shimi coco puff shimi shimi right shimi shimi coco puff. Does anybody here want to sleep with me. I'm really a nice guy, it's really not Satan...
It's me it's not let's all be happy he's not here say fuck Satan

Alright I'm out of jokes and out of songs, I we're done.