Luyện nghe bài hát Words of Wisdom

Tom: I'm going to come back and I'm going to start a therapeutic massage only for for...
Mark: I'm going to start my own colony
Tom: That would be grose, you tried that in our bus one
Mark: I tried to start our own nudist colony in our bus and it was pretty much just me hanging out naked, love you Tom
They love me so fuck everybody else
Mark: Yea fuck all you guys out that are cheering, yea we hate you Tom you suck dick burn in hell
Tom: Yea fuck that, hey I say I say fuck the hating Tom thing what I say, are we ready Mark
Mark: You know what it is you know what it is a lot of these people are now hopping on the we hate Tom bandwagon, like I've been hating tom since like 1995 I'm old school hating Tom guy alright
Tom: Oh shit, hey let's all say some words, everybody say fuck, everybody say shit, everyone say dick, everyone say Mark's an ass hole
Everyone say, everyone say we hate Mark, yea
Tom: Hey now let's do this one, everyone say fuck fuck shit fuck, that's the kind of words you should be at home kids
Mark: That's
Tom: do we do now
Mark: I want to call me an ass hole again
Tom: What's up I like your hair very nice
Mark: You his hair oh cool thanks he probably appreciates that a lot
I wanted to say I liked your but but I thought that was to foward you know
Mark: Hey this next song is for all the in the hezouse, hea he it's for all the ladies in the heoueoueouze
Mark!
Mark:
Shut the fuck up
Mark: It's for all the ladies in the houaeiouze, weee. Hey you know what hang on I want to this like a
Tom: (belch) me
Exuse Tom
Tom:
Mark: I want to make this like a big golf tournimant shut up everybody just clap like it's a golf tourniment
Tom: That's what it sounds like when I get done having sex, 15,000 people cheering me on, I could take all of you in my bed right fucking now, but you're not invited Mark. You have got giant boobs and I doubt 18, do you have a note from your mom, I want to meet your mom...
Mark: Hey put those 13 old boobs away, if I wanted to see 13 year old boobs I'd hang out by the Junior high like my dad like my dad does
Tom: Hey you know what I learned in grade
Mark: What's that dad has a bent weiner
My dad's weiner was bigger than mine then and still is
Mark: I want everyone here to scream, fuck you Tom,we fucking hate you you're going to burn in hell and die a horrible firery death we hate you stupid pieces of shit
Tom: I that
Thanks
Tom: You want to give me your shirt, this smells like blood and feces, dinner ok what does this say here
Mark: It like blood and feces, so it's your dad's shirt
Tom: Hey uh just like every other band we believe in a safe of sex don't we Mark, that we do so Mark's going to tell you about how safe we are
Mark: Let me tell you about the safest form of sex, it's when you get super drunk and you have sex with like ten people totally unprotected and you do drugs at the same time, no it's not true
Tom: It's not true you have to a weapon. How many of you guys have girlfreinds and how many of your girlfriends have guy friends, I hope you're not having sex
Mark: And more how many of your girlfriends have girlfriends
Tom: Cause' we believe in the love that between two vaginas
Mark: The most special kind of love of all is the love that exists between two naked while I watch
Tom: We need her to put her shirt on
Please
Tom: It just took away my boner, my boner just died, I had one and now it's
Mark: Please I saw your boobs and my wiener ran away. Hey hey hang on everyone everyone seriously I need your attention for just a second please, I think somebody lost a down here so everyone look around a contact lense hey someone lost a contact lense so uh...
I lost my virinity
Mark: an I out for it
Tom: I lost a testacle, hey what if testacles were things you could on a everyday basis that would suck, you've only got three, hey I've got to go pee pee
Mark: Do you want to go pee and I'll to the kids for a second
Tom: Do you think you can for enough time
No uh uh
Tom: Why don't you gather thoughts
Mark: Why don't you just wet pants and we'll call it even
Tom: I just piss in my pants right here, if you guys all pitch in a dollar each I'll piss my pants right here now, that should pay me about two-hundred bucks maybe
Mark: I'll you three-hundred dollars to piss your pants right now
I'll give you four-hundred bucks to eat my shit
Mark:
Tom: Sold, apparently there's a kid that's hurt right now and I think helping them out right now, it looks like they're right there
Mark: Make a hole make a hole
Tom: All you people over make way for the hurt kid and bring me their wallet
Mark: I now you know let me tell you guys something...
I'm gay!
Mark: There's thousands and thousands of people here today there's like semis and fucking buses and multiple and all kinds of shit, I wish now I would have taken bass lessons, sorry sorry
Tom: So do I, I you did too
I'm thinking for Christmas this year I'm going to ask for lessons
Tom: I know a guy, he has sex with his sister, he used his dick to pop her four foot blister, and I know it's not that cool, he fucked her in my pool, he's got three testacles, and he loves to do shit, fuck yea. Hey how come every time we say a joke it has to be about fucking sex masturbation insest, or anything grose like that you know
Is there anything else in the world
Tom: There's nothing else to about
Mark: Hey can you that little girl out of there she's not having so much fun right now, hey
Tom: Uh exuse me, security sir
Mark: The one right in of you, yea
Tom: Yea that girl right there to come out, if you're a small person the front is not the best view, and if you hate seeing shitty bands any of this is not a good view, this whole everything every seat here. Mark's middle name is Rebecca, they thought he was a...
Mark: That's right, my middle names because my dad wanted a girl, he treats me like one
Tom: I still have to go pee and I'm holding it in still, I'll piss my pants though for money, I'll eat a nugget of my own poop for twenty bucks, pay you twenty bucks and I'll eat it
You shave your ass
Tom: You have hair on nothing but your balls, has no hair on his whole body but a fucking wolverine growning in his pants, I swear to God, it's got teeth and shit
It's true
Tom: He's got a scary penis
Mark: It's true I need your tax deductable donations for the shave Mark's balls program,
Tom: for charity kids
Mark: Please what you can, donate your time
Tom: You guys think that we're for our own, no this is a charity tour for Mark's balls
Mark: We're trying to raise enough to shave my nuts, please give generously
Tom: There's no metal strong enough to be the teeth on any of electric shaver, what do we do now, oh I need a new guitar
We need a new guitar, we need a new guitarist, any one out there play guitar
Tom: Does anybody how to play guitar cause' I'm not very good, people don't really respect me
If I were a girl, every time I went to the gynecologist, I'd fake an orgasm
Tom: Bad
Bad christmas spirit
Tom: Bad christmas
Mark: Hey ok I need now
Tom: We're going to out every single person that didn't sing
Mark: Santa Claus is going to come to your house and under all your trees
Tom: Santa Claus is going to rape your dogs, Oh God you know what I'm kind of ashamed of being myself today, and yesterday and the day before that, not really pround of who I am or how I look. Any one have one of those days were you don't even really like what you're wearing, you know, you don't like how your hair looks, and kind of bumed about how your penis is so small and bent and wierd. That is the ugliest but I have ever seen. Let's hear it for not wiping! And this guy fuck wiping dude, brings down the rain forest. Ok this is a song I wrote...
Mark: That guy has a science project up his ass
Tom: Uh what head's up seven up, everyone your eyes and if I come by and if I come by and put my finger in you but than you're the one.
I think Satan has a couple of comments:
Well kids it's been a really fun show, and I want you all to know that we'll come back soon, but before I go I want to say I think Tom is extemely good looking and all the girls out there should think good looking. Tom has one of the best butts that I've ever seen, shimi shimi coco puff shimi shimi right shimi shimi coco puff. Does anybody here want to sleep with me. I'm really a nice guy, it's really not Satan...
It's me it's not Satan let's all be happy he's not here say fuck

I'm out of jokes and out of songs, I think we're done.