What Are the Odds?

Susan:
4.57 billion years ago
A tiny speck appears out in space
In the black sits a quietly spinning sphere
Where something wack is about to take place

Heidi:
What are the odds
That this planet would be the perfect distance from the sun?
What are the odds
Scientists say, they're about an octillion to one

The first amino acid sits alone in a puddle
Feeling lonely and somewhat incomplete
And when he least expects it, he suddenly finds himself
Metabolizing from the heat

Jeff + Hunter:
And then to his surprise
He suddenly multiplies
And every millisecond,
He celebrates a new birth

All:
And soon he makes his way
Through all of the oceans
He's a part of every plant and dinosaur on the earth
Whoa, (spoken) dinosaur
Oh, that amino acid is the key that will open the door

What are the odds
That all this prehistoric fauna gets to have so much fun?
What are the odds?
Wikipedia says a quinticilliontrillion to one

Heidi:
A stegosaurus roams around the planet's first chapter
Finding pretty flowers to munch

Susan:
Then a little baby, super cute velociraptor
Will grow up to eat the steggy for lunch

Jeff:
Unbeknownst to all the planet earth's beautiful creatures
Something horrible is closing in

All:
A giant-ass rock crashes into Earth
And though it brings the end to an era
A new and bizarre one is about to begin

Hunter:
Hermit crabs and baby turtles
Start crawling 'round everywhere
And before we know, there are lots of spunky monkeys
That are swinging through the jungle air

Jeff:
The bumblebees start zooming around
With the beetles and the dragonflies
And then the lizards get together
And invent the feather
To become the birds in the skies

Susan + Heidi:
And then the turtles and the monkeys and the beetles and the birds
Dominate the biosphere mix

All:
And soon The Turtles and The Monkees and The Beatles and The Birds
Dominate the Billboard Hot 100 Charts in 1966

Hunter:
Years whiz by, like, forty milla-skion
The earth is running rampant with the human being

All:
And what are the odds that one girl and one guy
Would find one another and unify?

Jeff + Hunter:
A boy drives a Hot Rod and lives in Escondido
He turns 20 and he's ready to roam

Susan + Heidi:
A girl watches Mod Squad alone in Toledo
She, too, gets a hankering

All:
That it's time to leave home

Jeff + Hunter:
So she leaves Ohio

Susan + Heidi:
And he leaves Cali

All:
They head East to their new domains
They meet one night at a bowling alley
It's love at first sight at Fantasy Lanes
Then one night something happens to them
After sharing a malt and french fries
This man and this woman get up on each other
Something starts to grow
And nine months later, something new enters this world
And it opens its eyes

What are the odds
That we would get this world and mix up like a cinnamon bun?
What are the odds
That we would get through Mussolini and Attila the Hun?
What are the odds
That we would make it through Andrew Dice Clay and Nora Dunn?
What are the odds?
Probably about an "anjillion" gazillion to one
An "anjillion" gazillion to one
Ann Jillian