I the motion of the car before I open my eyes. The air is blue-black, brown-black, black-black. of gas, oil, animals. I'm in the trunk.
My wrists and tied. over my mouth it almost my nose but I can barely. I must been here for hours, everything's and my head throbs like someone's on china.
The car stops. He turns off the -- but there are no traffic sounds. No sounds. No wind. What place has no wind? I turn my head the sounds like people watch radios something terrible happens.
My are sweating. Where am I? The trunk squeaks as he it up and the sun blinds me. He looks like a faceless Jesus surrounded by light. He me out of the trunk and bangs my head against the door. I try to cry out, but it like a hum.
He drags me, half-standing, along a dirt road a house. I can't see any other houses and it looks a farm. The screen door bangs behind me and I feel a deep, deep inside. All the rules changed here.
I'm dragged down a hall like a bag and I for a phone, other doors. Nothing but bare floors and brown in small rooms. He pulls me the bathroom and I crack my head as he pushes me onto the floor. Tilts his to the side and gazes at me as if I was a pet walks out.
I'm lying there for a long time, to get the tape off of me. My eyes are tearing. I make a sound. I can't get up and I keep rolling from side to side, not to make noise.
I've got to get him to to me. If I can get this thing off my I can talk to him. tell him my name. Have you killed other in here? I'm thinking you've got of them nailed down, on walls, hanging from ceiling fans swinging dead in wind.
Why did you me? If I had stayed to at the library I would have been there minutes longer maybe I'd have OK. Would have rushed the house, books piled up in my arms like a baby, and explanations why I was sorry. So I'm late everyone.
you have waited for me anyway? Would you have picked woman? Would I read about her in the paper and said oh my god, I was there night... and all my friends in a panic. Telling them then how much I them as if I'd never have the again.
I what everyone is doing now. Putting up signs. Showing my picture on the evening news. old friends. I'm not even considered missing yet.
The family fall apart and my parents will go crazy. Slowly. My brother will be so quiet at the funeral and the casket be closed. (I never even told anyone what of funeral I wanted when I died.)
Maybe years from now they'll find my on the floor and they'll have to use dental records to identify me. My will say "At least we know now. We always she was alive somewhere. We just she's in peace."
When I my dreams are crazy -- I'm flying over fields. I don't I sleep for more than twenty minutes and when I wake up, it like I'm under a heavy blanket. I'm still here.
As I wake up I a dog barking in the distance and I think I'm in my parents' in South Carolina. When I open my eyes, there's a pressed between them. I'll get married. I'll have kids. never go to Europe. I'll never learn to piano. never write a book.
The last I hear is a click