Me and my got us a wild hair And figured we wanted to go So we loaded up in my ragtop We had a little bit of money and a whole lot of And with Junior blaring on the radio We got a full of gas and we was on our way
We we'd go down to New Orleans We barrelling' down old 17 a man with a blinking red light was on our tail He said, "You were 60 in a 45 But I'm gonna let you go this But if I catch you again, I'm gonna you in the county jail"
We said, "Thank you sir, you been nice And you ain't have to tell us twice" And we Southbound and down with the wind blowing in our faces We on rolling and pretty soon The radio was cooking out a tune And we pulling into Houston and checking out all the places
I was feeling dry and I said, "I We ought to stop and get a drink" Old Jim said, "Yeah we got time to kill" We kept on rolling and I seen spot We into the parking lot Of this called, 'The Cloud Nine Bar and Grill'
We walked through the door and the was jammed The lights were low, they had a rock band And some orange haired feller about suicide I said, "Jim, this ain't our of place He said, "Well, let's just have one anyway" So against my better judgment we walked on
up to the bar and we sat down This feller walked up and said, "I'll buy round" And he sat down on the barstool to Jim He looked like a girl but he talked a guy He had lipstick on and mascara in his And everybody in that place just about like him
I said, "Jim, ain't our kind of bar just go on out and get back in the car 'Cause there's be trouble, ain't no sense in taking a chance" We was getting up, ready to leave somebody grabbed old Jim by the sleeve And this good looking girl, she was my buddy to dance
I said, "Jim, don't do it, there's missing There's dancing and fellers kissing There's a in high heeled shoes wearing panty hose" He said, "Partner, I just can't turn down You just go over there and one more round dance with the lady and we'll get on down the road"
So he walked away and left me But this funny feller kept coming on And he was me mad with some of the things he said Then he put his hand on my I said, "If you don't get paw off me I'm gonna locate your nose around the other of your head"
He said, "I love it when you get that fire in eye I said, "Well, try this on for size" And I unloaded on him and he went out a light Everybody in that place must been his friend They all for me, I said, "This is the end" But where I come from, we give up without a fight
They were screaming and and scratching and clawing I was punching and and kicking and pawing I was my own, 'cause I've been in a scrap or two Old Jim come up out of the blue And that gal he was with, come up too And proceeded to beat on me with a high heel
I grabbed her by the hair it came off in my And that girl was just a beautiful man And old Jim got sick right there on the floor He dropped that dude like a from a gun Smeared his lipstick, his makeup run And me and old Jim started our way to the door
Man, we lit out of there in that I put in on the floor and it stayed way We was going' the highway doing about a hundred and ten We were for home and we was getting nearer a red light came on the rear view mirror And that same blame cop was pulling us again
Now I'm here in this county jail I had to call my Daddy to go our But I learned me a lesson that I never will again I've done up drinking', I've give up bars And running the country in souped up cars I'm back where the women are women and the men are men