Seven in the evening Watchin stupid on TV I'm out on the sofa When my comes in the room and sees me
And she says, Is 'Behind the Music' Lynyrd Skynyrd?" And I say, "I don't know, say, gettin' late What cha wanna do for
She says, "I had a big lunch So I'm not hungry" I said, "Well you know, I'm not starvin' either but I eat"
She said, "So what do you in mind?" I said, "I don't know, what you?" She says, "I don't care, if you're let's eat" I said, "That's we're gonna do!"
"But first you gotta me it is you're hungry for!" And she says, "Let me What's in our refrigerator?"
I said, "Well, tuna, I know" She said, "That went bad a ago!" I said, "Is the okay?" She said, "You that yesterday!"
I hopped up and I said, "I don't Do you want to get delivered?" She's like, "Why would I to eat liver? I don't even liver!"
I'm like, "No, I said " She's like, "I you say liver!" I'm like, "I know what I said" She's like, "Whatever, I don't want any liver!"
Well, I was say something But my cell phone to ring Now who could be me? I checked my caller ID
It was just cousin callin' For the time today My said, "Let it go to voicemail" I said, "Okay"
"Where were we? Oh, dinner, So what do you do?" She said, "Why don't you whip up in the kitchen?" "Yeah?" I said, "Why you?"
And then she "Baby, we just go out to dinner, please?" I says no, she says yes, I says no, she yes I no, she says yes, oh, here's your keys"
I a little bit closer Say, "Okay, ya wanna go?" She says, "How The Ivy?" I said, "Yeah, I don't know"
I feel like, gettin all dressed up And expensive food says, "Olive Garden?" I say, "Nah, I'm not in the
And Burrito King make me gassy no doubt" She says, "Just forget it" I said, "No, I swear I'm take you out!"
Then I get an I say, "I know we'll do!" She says, "What?" I say, "Guess" She says, "What?" I say, "We're to the drive-thru!"
So we head out the front Open the garage I open the car doors And we get in those car
Put my key in the And I turn it sideways Then we fasten our belts As we out the driveway
we drive to the drive-thru Heading off to the We're approaching the close to the drive-thru
Almost at the drive-thru Now here at the drive thru Here in line at the Did I the drive-thru?
Well, we are in the drive-thru line Me and her Cars in front of us, in back of us All waiting to order
There's some idiot in a With his brights on me I out the window and scream "Hey, what cha to do, blind me?"
My says, "Maybe we should park We could go eat inside" I said, "I'm bunny slippers So I leavin' this ride"
Now a woman on a box Is sayin', "Can I your order, please?" I said, "Yes indeed, you can We'd like two hamburgers with and cheese"
my wife says "Baby, hold on, changed my mind! I I'm gonna have a chicken sandwich this time"
I said, "You get a cheeseburger!" She says, "That's not I'm hungry for" I put my head in my hands and "I know who you are anymore!"
The on the speaker says "I don't all day!" I said, "Then our order And be on our way!
"I wanna get a sandwich And I want a too" like, "You want onions on that?" I'm like, "Yeah, I said that I do
Plus we need fries And don't you forget it And two root beers No, just one, split it"
I said, "I'm guessin' that You're not too bright So read me my order make sure you got it right"
She says, "One, you want a sandwich Two, you a cheeseburger Three, fries and a large root beer" "Stop, go no further!"
"I never ordered a large root I medium, not large!" Then she says, "We're havin' a I you at no charge"
"Oh" And all I could say was "oh" And she says, "Now somethin' else I really think you should know
You can unlimited refills For a quarter more" I say, "Great, we're in the drive-thru So what I want that for?"
Then she says, "Wait a Your voice sounds so familiar, hey, is Paul? And my wife is all like, "No, that ain't Now me, who's this Paul?
She says, "Oh, he's some guy Who goes to with me I sat him last year And I off of him in Geometry
I said, "I know a guy Paul He used to be my He was prematurely And he moved to Pittsburgh last
He also had bladder And a really bad on his toe" And she says, "Mister, please, you can stop right That's way more than I to know!"
And then we both quiet And things got intense And then she says, "Next please, That'll be five dollars and two cents"
So we inched in line Movin' slow I got a bored So I turned on the
Click, it off Because my wife was getting a So we just sat there quietly For her
Then I at her And she back at me And I said, "Um I you have somethin' in your teeth"
She turned away me And then turned and said, "Did I get it?" I said, "Yeah, well, I mean, of it But hey, ya know, don't it"
Then she said, "How now?" I said, "Yeah, There's still a little bit there but don't It's just a piece of toast"
Now at the pay window Or whatever you it Put my hand in my I can't believe no wallet!
And the lady at the like "Well well, that'll be five eighty-two" I around to my wife and say "How much you got on you?"
She just her eyes and says "I'll pay for I guess" So she reaches into her And busts out the American
I it to the lady And she says, "Oh It's gotta be only We don't take cards here"
I took back the card and "Gee, Well that sucks!" And when I found out My wife was only carryin' bucks
I said, "I you were to hit the ATM today" She says, "I got around to it So where's wallet anyway?
And I said, "Nevermind Just me to find some change" Now the lady at the Is looking at me kinda
And she says, "Mister, We gotta move line along" I said, "Now hold your horses lady We be long"
So I looked inside the glove box And the mat beneath my feet I a nickel in an ashtray And a pennies and a dime in the space between the seats
Before long I had a little Of coins of every The lady counts it up and "You're about a dollar short"
And now my woman's got this weird on her face She screams, "You I even really hungry in the first place"
And so I around To the cashier I and said, "Okay Forget the sandwich then"
So I up my change up my receipt And I to the pickup window Man, I just can't to eat
And now we see this acne Kid sixteen Wearin' a dorky nametag says "Hello, my is Eugene"
And he me a paper bag I look him in the And I say to him "Hey, I get some ketchup for my fries?"
Well he at me And I at him And he at me And I at him
And he at me And I at him And he says, "I'm did you want again?"
I say, "Ketchup!" And he says, "Oh yeah, that's I just spaced out for a second I'm kind of burnt tonight"
And then he me the ketchup And then we're finally away And the food is me mad With its bouquet
I'm to death By the time we up at the traffic light I say, "Baby, gimme that I just have a bite!"
So she in the bag And pulls out the And she hands me the And I up the burger
And then I the paper I into those buns And I just believe it forgot the onions!