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Seven o'clock in the
Watchin somethin' on TV
I'm zoned out on the
When my comes in the room and sees me

And she says, Is 'Behind the Music'
Lynyrd Skynyrd?"
And I say, "I don't know, say, it's late
What cha wanna do for

She says, "I had a big lunch
So I'm not hungry"
I said, "Well you know,
I'm not starvin' but I could eat"

She said, "So do you have in mind?"
I said, "I don't know, what you?"
She says, "I don't care, if you're hungry eat"
I said, "That's what we're do!"

"But you gotta tell me
What it is hungry for!"
And she says, "Let me
left in our refrigerator?"

I said, "Well, tuna, I know"
She said, "That bad a week ago!"
I said, "Is the okay?"
She said, "You that yesterday!"

I hopped up and I said, "I know
Do you to get something delivered?"
She's like, "Why I want to eat liver?
I even like liver!"

I'm like, "No, I 'delivered' "
She's like, "I you say liver!"
I'm like, "I know what I said"
She's like, "Whatever, I just want any liver!"

Well, I was gonna say
But my phone started to ring
Now who be callin' me?
Well I my caller ID

It was just cousin callin'
For the third today
My said, "Let it go to voicemail"
I said, "Okay"

"Where we? Oh, dinner, right
So what do you do?"
She said, "Why don't you up somethin in the kitchen?"
"Yeah?" I said, "Why you?"

And then she
"Baby, can't we go out to dinner, please?"
I says no, she says yes, I no, she says yes
I no, she says yes, oh, here's your keys"

I step a bit closer
Say, "Okay, ya wanna go?"
She says, "How The Ivy?"
I said, "Yeah, I don't know"

I don't like, gettin all dressed up
And eatin' expensive
says, "Olive Garden?"
I say, "Nah, I'm not in the

And Burrito would make me gassy
no doubt"
She says, "Just about it"
I said, "No, I swear I'm take you out!"

Then I get an
I say, "I know we'll do!"
She says, "What?" I say, "Guess"
She says, "What?" I say, "We're to the drive-thru!"

So we head out the door
Open the garage
Then I the car doors
And we get in those car

Put my key in the
And then I it sideways
Then we our seat belts
As we out the driveway

Then we to the drive-thru
off to the drive-thru
We're the drive-thru
Getting to the drive-thru

there at the drive-thru
Now we're here at the drive
in line at the drive-thru
Did I mention the

Well, here we are in the drive-thru
Me and her
Cars in front of us, in back of us
All just waiting to

some idiot in a Volvo
With his on behind me
I lean out the window and
"Hey, what cha tryin to do, me?"

My wife says, "Maybe we park
We could go eat inside"
I said, "I'm bunny slippers
So I ain't this ride"

Now a woman on a box
Is sayin', "Can I your order, please?"
I said, "Yes indeed, you can
like two hamburgers with onions and cheese"

Then my says
"Baby, hold on, I've my mind!
I I'm gonna have a chicken sandwich
Instead time"

I said, "You get a cheeseburger!"
She says, "That's not I'm hungry for"
I put my in my hands and scream
"I don't who you are anymore!"

The voice on the says
"I have all day!"
I said, "Then our order
And be on our way!

"I wanna get a sandwich
And I a cheeseburger too"
She's like, "You want on that?"
I'm like, "Yeah, I already that I do

Plus we need fries
And don't you dare it
And two medium beers
No, just one, split it"

Then I said, "I'm guessin'
probably not too bright
So read me back my
make sure you got it right"

She says, "One, you want a chicken
Two, you want a
Three, fries and a large root beer"
"Stop, go no further!"

"I never ordered a root beer
I medium, not large!"
she says, "We're havin' a special
I you at no charge"

"Oh"
And that's all I say was "oh"
And she says, "Now theres somethin'
That I think you should know

You can unlimited refills
For just a more"
I say, "Great, except we're in the
So what would I that for?"

Then she says, "Wait a
Your sounds so familiar, hey, is this Paul?
And my wife is all like, "No, ain't Paul
Now tell me, who's Paul?

She says, "Oh, just some guy
Who to school with me
I sat behind him last
And I off of him in Geometry

I said, "I a guy named Paul
He used to be my
He was bald
And he moved to last summer

He also had problems
And a really bad on his toe"
And she says, "Mister, please, you can right there
That's way than I needed to know!"

And then we were quiet
And things got real
And then she says, "Next please,
That'll be dollars and eighty two cents"

So we inched ahead in
Movin' slow
I got a bored
So I on the radio

Click, it off
my wife was getting a headache
So we both sat there quietly
For her

Then I at her
And she back at me
And I said, "Um
I think you have in your teeth"

She turned away me
And then back and said, "Did I get it?"
I said, "Yeah, well, I mean, of it
But hey, ya know, don't it"

she said, "How about now?"
I said, "Yeah,
There's still a little bit there but don't
It's probably just a of toast"

Now we're at the pay
Or you call it
Put my hand in my
I can't believe no wallet!

And the lady at the window's
"Well well well, be five eighty-two"
I turn around to my and say
"How have you got on you?"

She just her eyes and says
"I'll pay for I guess"
So she reaches her purse
And busts out the American

I hand it to the
And she says, "Oh
It's be cash only
We take credit cards here"

I took the card and said
"Gee, Well that sucks!"
And that's when I out
My wife was only carryin' three

I said, "I you were
to hit the ATM today"
She says, "I never got to it
So where's your wallet

And I said, "Nevermind
Just help me to some change"
Now the lady at the
Is looking at me kinda

And she says, "Mister,
We move this line along"
I said, "Now hold your stinkin' lady
We be long"

So I looked around inside the box
And checked the mat my feet
I a nickel in an ashtray
And a pennies and a dime in the space between the seats

long I had a little pile
Of coins of sort
The counts it up and says
"You're still about a short"

And now my woman's got this look
on her face
She screams, "You
I wasn't even really in the first place"

And so I around
To the cashier
I and said, "Okay
Forget the sandwich then"

So I up my change
up my receipt
And I to the pickup window
Man, I just can't to eat

And now we see this acne
Kid sixteen
Wearin' a dorky nametag says
"Hello, my is Eugene"

And he me a paper bag
I him in the eyes
And I say to him "Hey,
I get some ketchup for my fries?"

Well he at me
And I at him
And he at me
And I at him

And he at me
And I at him
And he says, "I'm
What did you again?"

I say, "Ketchup!"
And he says, "Oh yeah, that's
I just out there for a second
I'm really of burnt tonight"

And he hands me the ketchup
And then finally drivin' away
And the food is me mad
With its bouquet

I'm to death
By the time we up at the traffic light
I say, "Baby, that burger
I just gotta a bite!"

So she in the bag
And out the burger
And she hands me the
And I pick up the

And I unwrap the paper
I bite those buns
And I just can't it
forgot the onions!

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