Seven in the evening Watchin somethin' on TV I'm zoned out on the When my comes in the room and sees me
And she says, Is this the Music' Lynyrd Skynyrd?" And I say, "I don't know, say, it's gettin' cha wanna do for dinner?
She says, "I had a big lunch So I'm not hungry" I said, "Well you know, I'm not starvin' either but I eat"
She said, "So do you have in mind?" I said, "I don't know, what you?" She says, "I don't care, if you're let's eat" I said, "That's what gonna do!"
"But first you gotta me it is you're hungry for!" And she says, "Let me What's in our refrigerator?"
I said, "Well, tuna, I know" She said, "That bad a week ago!" I said, "Is the okay?" She said, "You that yesterday!"
I hopped up and I said, "I don't Do you want to get delivered?" She's like, "Why would I to eat liver? I even like liver!"
I'm like, "No, I 'delivered' " like, "I heard you say liver!" I'm like, "I know what I said" like, "Whatever, I just don't want any liver!"
Well, I was gonna say But my cell started to ring Now who could be me? I checked my caller ID
It was just Larry callin' For the third today My said, "Let it go to voicemail" I said, "Okay"
"Where we? Oh, dinner, right So do you wanna do?" She said, "Why you whip up somethin in the kitchen?" "Yeah?" I said, "Why you?"
And then she "Baby, can't we go out to dinner, please?" I says no, she yes, I says no, she says yes I says no, she says yes, oh, your keys"
I a little bit closer Say, "Okay, where ya go?" She says, "How The Ivy?" I said, "Yeah, well I know"
I don't feel like, all dressed up And expensive food says, "Olive Garden?" I say, "Nah, I'm not in the
And Burrito King would make me no doubt" She says, "Just forget it" I said, "No, I I'm gonna take you out!"
Then I get an I say, "I know what do!" She says, "What?" I say, "Guess" She says, "What?" I say, "We're to the drive-thru!"
So we head out the door the garage door Then I open the car And we get in car doors
Put my key in the And then I turn it Then we our seat belts As we out the driveway
Then we to the drive-thru off to the drive-thru We're the drive-thru Getting to the drive-thru
Almost there at the Now we're at the drive thru in line at the drive-thru Did I the drive-thru?
Well, here we are in the line Me and her Cars in front of us, in back of us All just waiting to
There's idiot in a Volvo his brights on behind me I lean out the window and "Hey, cha tryin to do, blind me?"
My says, "Maybe we should park We could go eat inside" I said, "I'm wearin' bunny So I leavin' this ride"
Now a woman on a box Is sayin', "Can I your order, please?" I said, "Yes indeed, you can We'd like two hamburgers with and cheese"
Then my says "Baby, hold on, changed my mind! I I'm gonna have a chicken sandwich Instead time"
I said, "You get a cheeseburger!" She says, "That's not what I'm for" I put my head in my hands and "I don't who you are anymore!"
The voice on the speaker "I have all day!" I said, "Then our order And be on our way!
"I wanna get a chicken And I a cheeseburger too" She's like, "You want on that?" I'm like, "Yeah, I already that I do
Plus we curly fries And don't you dare it And two medium root No, just one, split it"
Then I said, "I'm guessin' You're not too bright So me back my order Let's make you got it right"
She says, "One, you want a sandwich Two, you a cheeseburger Three, fries and a large root beer" "Stop, go no further!"
"I never ordered a root beer I medium, not large!" Then she says, "We're havin' a I you at no charge"
"Oh" And that's all I say was "oh" And she says, "Now theres somethin' I really think you should know
You can unlimited refills For a quarter more" I say, "Great, except in the drive-thru So what I want that for?"
Then she says, "Wait a Your sounds so familiar, hey, is this Paul? And my wife is all like, "No, ain't Paul Now tell me, who's Paul?
She says, "Oh, he's just guy Who goes to with me I sat him last year And I copied off of him in
I said, "I a guy named Paul He used to be my He was prematurely And he moved to last summer
He had bladder problems And a really bad on his toe" And she says, "Mister, please, you can stop there That's way more I needed to know!"
And then we were quiet And things got real And she says, "Next window please, That'll be five dollars and two cents"
So we inched in line Movin' slow I got a bored So I on the radio
Click, it off Because my wife was a headache So we just sat there quietly For her
I looked at her And she back at me And I said, "Um I think you have somethin' in teeth"
She turned from me And then back and said, "Did I get it?" I said, "Yeah, well, I mean, of it But hey, ya know, don't it"
she said, "How about now?" I said, "Yeah, There's still a little bit there but don't It's probably just a of toast"
Now we're at the pay Or you call it Put my in my pocket I can't there's no wallet!
And the at the window's like "Well well well, be five eighty-two" I around to my wife and say "How much you got on you?"
She just rolls her eyes and "I'll pay for I guess" So she into her purse And busts out the American
I hand it to the And she says, "Oh It's be cash only We take credit cards here"
I back the card and said "Gee, really? Well sucks!" And when I found out My was only carryin' three bucks
I said, "I thought you to hit the ATM today" She says, "I got around to it So your wallet anyway?
And I said, "Nevermind Just help me to some change" Now the lady at the Is at me kinda strange
And she says, "Mister, We gotta move line along" I said, "Now hold your stinkin' horses We be long"
So I looked inside the glove box And checked the mat beneath my I found a in an ashtray And a couple pennies and a dime in the between the seats
Before I had a little pile Of coins of every The lady counts it up and "You're still a dollar short"
And now my woman's got this weird on her face She screams, "You I wasn't even really hungry in the place"
And so I turned To the again I and said, "Okay Forget the chicken then"
So I pick up my Pick up my And I drive to the pickup Man, I just can't to eat
And now we see acne ridden Kid about Wearin' a dorky nametag says "Hello, my is Eugene"
And he hands me a bag I look him in the And I say to him "Hey, Could I get ketchup for my fries?"
he looks at me And I at him And he at me And I at him
And he at me And I at him And he says, "I'm did you want again?"
I say, "Ketchup!" And he says, "Oh yeah, that's I spaced out there for a second I'm really kind of tonight"
And then he hands me the And then we're drivin' away And the food is me mad With its bouquet
I'm starvin' to By the time we pull up at the light I say, "Baby, that burger I just have a bite!"
So she in the bag And out the burger And she me the burger And I pick up the
And then I the paper I bite into those And I can't believe it They the onions!