Seven o'clock in the Watchin somethin' on TV I'm zoned out on the When my comes in the room and sees me
And she says, Is this the Music' Lynyrd Skynyrd?" And I say, "I don't know, say, it's late What cha wanna do for
She says, "I kinda had a big So I'm not hungry" I said, "Well you know, I'm not starvin' but I could eat"
She said, "So what do you in mind?" I said, "I don't know, about you?" She says, "I don't care, if you're let's eat" I said, "That's what we're do!"
"But you gotta tell me What it is you're for!" And she says, "Let me left in our refrigerator?"
I said, "Well, tuna, I know" She said, "That went bad a ago!" I said, "Is the okay?" She said, "You that yesterday!"
I hopped up and I said, "I know Do you to get something delivered?" She's like, "Why I want to eat liver? I don't even liver!"
I'm like, "No, I 'delivered' " like, "I heard you say liver!" I'm like, "I should know I said" She's like, "Whatever, I just don't any liver!"
Well, I was say something But my cell phone started to Now who could be me? I checked my caller ID
It was cousin Larry callin' For the third time My said, "Let it go to voicemail" I said, "Okay"
"Where we? Oh, dinner, right So do you wanna do?" She said, "Why don't you whip up in the kitchen?" "Yeah?" I said, "Why you?"
And she says "Baby, can't we go out to dinner, please?" I no, she says yes, I says no, she says yes I says no, she yes, oh, here's your keys"
I step a little bit Say, "Okay, where ya go?" She says, "How The Ivy?" I said, "Yeah, I don't know"
I don't like, gettin all dressed up And eatin' expensive says, "Olive Garden?" I say, "Nah, I'm not in the
And Burrito King would me gassy no doubt" She says, "Just forget it" I said, "No, I swear I'm take you out!"
I get an idea I say, "I know what do!" She says, "What?" I say, "Guess" She says, "What?" I say, "We're to the drive-thru!"
So we head out the front Open the door I open the car doors And we get in those car
Put my key in the And then I turn it we fasten our seat belts As we pull out the
Then we to the drive-thru off to the drive-thru We're the drive-thru close to the drive-thru
Almost there at the Now we're at the drive thru Here in at the drive-thru Did I mention the
Well, here we are in the line Me and her in front of us, cars in back of us All just to order
There's some in a Volvo With his on behind me I lean out the and scream "Hey, what cha tryin to do, me?"
My wife says, "Maybe we park We could go eat inside" I said, "I'm bunny slippers So I ain't leavin' ride"
Now a on a speaker box Is sayin', "Can I your order, please?" I said, "Yes indeed, you can like two hamburgers with onions and cheese"
Then my wife "Baby, hold on, I've my mind! I think I'm have a chicken sandwich this time"
I said, "You get a cheeseburger!" She says, "That's not I'm hungry for" I put my in my hands and scream "I know who you are anymore!"
The voice on the says "I don't all day!" I said, "Then take our And be on our way!
"I get a chicken sandwich And I want a too" She's like, "You want on that?" I'm like, "Yeah, I already that I do
Plus we need fries And don't you forget it And two medium beers No, just one, we'll it"
Then I said, "I'm that probably not too bright So me back my order Let's sure you got it right"
She says, "One, you want a chicken Two, you want a Three, curly and a large root beer" "Stop, go no further!"
"I never a large root beer I medium, not large!" Then she says, "We're a special I you at no charge"
"Oh" And that's all I say was "oh" And she says, "Now theres else That I think you should know
You can have refills For a quarter more" I say, "Great, except in the drive-thru So what would I that for?"
Then she says, "Wait a Your voice so familiar, hey, is this Paul? And my wife is all like, "No, that ain't Now me, who's this Paul?
She says, "Oh, he's some guy Who to school with me I sat him last year And I copied off of him in
I said, "I a guy named Paul He used to be my He was bald And he moved to last summer
He had bladder problems And a really bad on his toe" And she says, "Mister, please, you can stop right That's way more than I to know!"
And we both were quiet And things got intense And then she says, "Next please, That'll be five and eighty two cents"
So we ahead in line Movin' slow I got a little So I turned on the
Click, it off my wife was getting a headache So we both sat there quietly For her
I looked at her And she back at me And I said, "Um I you have somethin' in your teeth"
She away from me And then back and said, "Did I get it?" I said, "Yeah, well, I mean, of it But hey, ya know, don't it"
she said, "How about now?" I said, "Yeah, There's still a bit there but don't worry It's just a piece of toast"
Now at the pay window Or whatever you it Put my hand in my I believe there's no wallet!
And the at the window's like "Well well well, that'll be eighty-two" I around to my wife and say "How have you got on you?"
She just her eyes and says "I'll pay for I guess" So she reaches into her And busts out the American
I hand it to the And she says, "Oh It's be cash only We don't take cards here"
I took back the and said "Gee, really? Well sucks!" And that's I found out My wife was carryin' three bucks
I said, "I thought you to hit the ATM today" She says, "I got around to it So your wallet anyway?
And I said, "Nevermind Just help me to some change" Now the at the window Is looking at me kinda
And she says, "Mister, We gotta move this along" I said, "Now hold your horses lady We be long"
So I looked inside the glove box And the mat beneath my feet I a nickel in an ashtray And a couple pennies and a in the space between the seats
Before I had a little pile Of of every sort The lady counts it up and "You're still about a short"
And now my woman's got this look Frozen on her She screams, "You I wasn't really hungry in the first place"
And so I turned To the again I and said, "Okay Forget the chicken then"
So I pick up my up my receipt And I drive to the pickup Man, I can't wait to eat
And now we see acne ridden Kid about Wearin' a dorky that says "Hello, my is Eugene"
And he hands me a bag I look him in the And I say to him "Hey, Could I get some for my fries?"
Well he at me And I at him And he at me And I at him
And he at me And I at him And he says, "I'm did you want again?"
I say, "Ketchup!" And he says, "Oh yeah, right I just spaced out there for a I'm really kind of tonight"
And then he me the ketchup And then we're drivin' away And the is drivin' me mad With its bouquet
I'm to death By the time we up at the traffic light I say, "Baby, gimme burger I just gotta a bite!"
So she in the bag And out the burger And she me the burger And I up the burger
And then I the paper I bite those buns And I can't believe it forgot the onions!