Seven in the evening somethin' stupid on TV I'm out on the sofa When my comes in the room and sees me
And she says, Is this the Music' Lynyrd Skynyrd?" And I say, "I don't know, say, it's late cha wanna do for dinner?
She says, "I had a big lunch So I'm not hungry" I said, "Well you know, I'm not either but I could eat"
She said, "So do you have in mind?" I said, "I don't know, about you?" She says, "I don't care, if you're let's eat" I said, "That's what we're do!"
"But first you gotta me What it is you're for!" And she says, "Let me What's in our refrigerator?"
I said, "Well, tuna, I know" She said, "That went bad a ago!" I said, "Is the okay?" She said, "You that yesterday!"
I hopped up and I said, "I know Do you to get something delivered?" She's like, "Why would I want to eat I don't like liver!"
I'm like, "No, I 'delivered' " like, "I heard you say liver!" I'm like, "I know what I said" like, "Whatever, I just don't want any liver!"
Well, I was say something But my phone started to ring Now who could be me? Well I my caller ID
It was just cousin callin' For the time today My said, "Let it go to voicemail" I said, "Okay"
"Where were we? Oh, dinner, So do you wanna do?" She said, "Why don't you whip up in the kitchen?" "Yeah?" I said, "Why you?"
And then she "Baby, can't we go out to dinner, please?" I says no, she says yes, I says no, she yes I says no, she says yes, oh, your keys"
I step a bit closer Say, "Okay, ya wanna go?" She says, "How The Ivy?" I said, "Yeah, I don't know"
I don't feel like, gettin all up And expensive food says, "Olive Garden?" I say, "Nah, I'm not in the
And Burrito would make me gassy no doubt" She says, "Just forget it" I said, "No, I swear I'm gonna you out!"
Then I get an I say, "I know we'll do!" She says, "What?" I say, "Guess" She says, "What?" I say, "We're to the drive-thru!"
So we head out the front the garage door Then I open the car And we get in those car
Put my key in the And I turn it sideways we fasten our seat belts As we out the driveway
Then we drive to the Heading off to the We're the drive-thru Getting to the drive-thru
there at the drive-thru Now we're at the drive thru in line at the drive-thru Did I the drive-thru?
Well, here we are in the drive-thru Me and her Cars in of us, cars in back of us All just to order
There's some idiot in a With his brights on me I out the window and scream "Hey, cha tryin to do, blind me?"
My wife says, "Maybe we park We just go eat inside" I said, "I'm wearin' bunny So I ain't this ride"
Now a woman on a box Is sayin', "Can I take order, please?" I said, "Yes indeed, you can like two hamburgers with onions and cheese"
Then my wife "Baby, on, I've changed my mind! I think I'm gonna have a chicken Instead time"
I said, "You get a cheeseburger!" She says, "That's not I'm hungry for" I put my head in my and scream "I know who you are anymore!"
The voice on the speaker "I have all day!" I said, "Then take our And be on our way!
"I wanna get a sandwich And I want a too" She's like, "You onions on that?" I'm like, "Yeah, I already that I do
Plus we need curly And don't you forget it And two root beers No, just one, split it"
Then I said, "I'm guessin' You're probably not too So me back my order Let's sure you got it right"
She says, "One, you a chicken sandwich Two, you a cheeseburger Three, curly fries and a root beer" "Stop, go no further!"
"I ordered a large root beer I medium, not large!" Then she says, "We're a special I you at no charge"
"Oh" And that's all I say was "oh" And she says, "Now theres else That I really you should know
You can have refills For a quarter more" I say, "Great, except we're in the So what would I want for?"
Then she says, "Wait a Your voice sounds so familiar, hey, is Paul? And my wife is all like, "No, that Paul Now tell me, who's this
She says, "Oh, he's just guy Who to school with me I sat him last year And I copied off of him in
I said, "I a guy named Paul He used to be my He was bald And he moved to Pittsburgh summer
He had bladder problems And a bad infection on his toe" And she says, "Mister, please, you can stop right That's way than I needed to know!"
And we both were quiet And got real intense And then she says, "Next please, That'll be five and eighty two cents"
So we ahead in line Movin' painfully I got a little So I on the radio
Click, it off Because my wife was getting a So we both just sat there For her
I looked at her And she looked at me And I said, "Um I think you have somethin' in teeth"
She away from me And then back and said, "Did I get it?" I said, "Yeah, well, I mean, of it But hey, ya know, sweat it"
Then she said, "How now?" I said, "Yeah, There's still a little bit there but worry probably just a piece of toast"
Now at the pay window Or whatever you it Put my in my pocket I believe there's no wallet!
And the lady at the window's "Well well, that'll be five eighty-two" I around to my wife and say "How have you got on you?"
She just rolls her and says "I'll pay for I guess" So she into her purse And out the American Express
I it to the lady And she says, "Oh gotta be cash only We don't take credit here"
I took back the and said "Gee, really? Well sucks!" And when I found out My wife was only carryin' bucks
I said, "I you were to hit the ATM today" She says, "I got around to it So your wallet anyway?
And I said, "Nevermind Just help me to find change" Now the lady at the Is looking at me strange
And she says, "Mister, We gotta move this along" I said, "Now hold your horses lady We be long"
So I looked around inside the box And checked the mat my feet I a nickel in an ashtray And a couple pennies and a dime in the space between the
Before I had a little pile Of of every sort The lady counts it up and "You're about a dollar short"
And now my got this weird look on her face She screams, "You I wasn't even really hungry in the place"
And so I around To the again I and said, "Okay Forget the chicken then"
So I up my change Pick up my And I drive to the window Man, I just can't to eat
And now we see acne ridden Kid about Wearin' a dorky nametag that "Hello, my is Eugene"
And he hands me a bag I look him in the And I say to him "Hey, Could I get some for my fries?"
he looks at me And I at him And he at me And I at him
And he at me And I at him And he says, "I'm did you want again?"
I say, "Ketchup!" And he says, "Oh yeah, right I just spaced out there for a I'm really kind of tonight"
And then he me the ketchup And then we're drivin' away And the food is me mad With its bouquet
I'm starvin' to By the time we pull up at the traffic I say, "Baby, that burger I just gotta a bite!"
So she in the bag And out the burger And she hands me the And I up the burger
And then I unwrap the I bite into those And I just believe it They the onions!