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ADAM: I am a goat.
I live on the of a pick-up truck.
The Old Man tied me with a 3 ft. rope.
Am I
He don't a fuck.
OLD Hey goat!
I'm gonna your head in with the hickory stick!
ADAM: Sometimes he his fists-a.
He's filled with anger and with rage,
and tells me I like piss-a.
His drink, Beam.
His chaser, a beer.
that, various alchohols.
That's the beatings get so severe,
I sleep,
I he falls.
But don't feel for me.
Things always this bad.
Why I was a young talking goat,
the Old Man was like my dad.

I from the hills of Europe.
where I met the Old Man.
He was in the woods,
I him directions,
He me a tuna can.
he stopped in his tracks and he said,
OLD Hey goat!
ADAM: Would you to live with me?
I got a house a pick-up truck
in a place D.C.-a.
I said, "sure why I got no family. You seem like a nice guy."
So we off to America,
the home of pie.

On the boat the Old Man me,
I would be a for his wife.
"A goat," he exclaimed,
"She's never this in her life!"
I so special.
Well, I just couldn't it,
after all years,
I had a friend.
He my beard,
he my hooves,
I prayed it never end.

But we got to his house,
was no wife.
Only a short, letter.
It : I'm leaving you for your brother
because he me better.
His eyes filled with of sadness.
His heart was filled grief.
To suit himself he a pint of Old Grandad,
and me like a side of beef.
I screamed, "send me back to the of Europe!"
He just his head and said,
OLD Nope!
No one will ever leave me again,
to sure,
put on the 3 ft. rope-a.
Present-day I've been on the for 51 years.
My friend is the A.M. radio.
the neighborhood children stop by,
but it's always rocks and beer bottles they throw.
At first they're to see a talking goat,
they gather 'round to hear what I to say.
But I guess my stories go on too long,
so leave and giggle,
I a bidet.
But you know was a night
I did get off the truck,
when the Old Man was out drunk.
Three neighborhood took me to a rock and roll concert.
The of music?
Old funk.

It was the time I'd been off the truck,
the music made me control.
The lead singer asked if we were fun,
I said, "fucking crank rock and roll-a!"
The women at the show beautiful,
as they sexily on the soft grass.
One of them even my fur.
me in the goat ass!
Then some long-haired guys grabbed me by the
and threw me in the pit-a.
They me around and treated me nice
til I nervously sprayed them shit-a.
Then the stopped.
And was quiet.
And all the rock and started a
fucking riot.
ROCK AND ROLLERS: the goat!
the goat!
the goat!
the goat!
ADAM: chased me under the bleachers.
They me onto the street-a.
They chased me an alley and said I was dead fucking goat meat-a.
But I saw a sight,
that I'd never I'd see.
The Old Man swinging his stick,
but he swinging at me.
OLD MAN: you pot smoking turkeys!
Don't you press luck!
ADAM: The long-hairs ran away
as I onto the truck-a.
When we got the Old Man said, "goat you broke the sacred law."
No!
Please!
Sorry!
Shit!
"I'll let it go time,
but if you again,
I'll break fucking jaw."
Super!
Great!
Okay!
you Old Man for saving my life.
Thank you and again.
You could let them barbeque me,
but you acted a friend.
"I'm not friend.
I don't even you.
I'm not drunk," he said.
To his point,
he drank a of grain alchohol,
and beat the shit out of my head.
Ow! Ow! Ow! hurting me Old Man.

night I suffered a concussion,
Deep my goat brain.
I still cannot my tailbone.
And I'll probably will walk straight again.
I guess call me,
goat.
A bag for the Old Man to mock.
Just his wife left him,
for his abnormaly large cock.
He could've my buddy.
But instead he's a old fuck.
And once I go to sleep,
in my home.......
the of the pick-up truck.
night Old Man!
OLD MAN: Yeah, night goat!

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