L.L. J 'em well And as you all I am hard as
up at 9:30 on a Saturday morn' Hemmed my control, turned my stereo on Then I reached for a since I don't use the picks And the was kinda cold so I put on my kicks
Walked to the and ate some cornflakes As I bop to a tape of Cut breaks With hardcore, heavyweight, b-boy Connoisseur of hardcore and Cut Creator's
in the shower, it was boiling hot So I stayed there a 'cause I like it a lot Jumped out, off, put on the Denim cologne I called up Earl on the telephone
He told me a jam that I could do later on 10 g's a Limo for one strong song So I said, yeah, I was with it, up and got geared Got a magnifying glass then I brushed my
some tapes of some Def Jam tunes As I waited for this to ring my bell at noon 12 o'clock came, the door crack The freak walked in a mink on her
Put her on the rack, threw my [Incomprehensible] on Then I threw in a of the quiet storm We Roundhill Cavern, ate soft mignons She said, "L.L., when you're let me taste your tongue?"
My got pale, I wam-bammed the tail Did it so hard I went to jail She left, came over and we went outside in the BM to bust a joyride
Went up to A.J. in my black wheel I'm not a sucker on the corner to scrape up a meal The want sex, the fellas try to plex But those who flex end up broke necks
Signed some for a posse of freaks Said, "It's L, baby, I ain't with Chic" We with the skeezers for 10 minutes more Then I in my ride and the freaks slammed the door
Due 'cause I'm a people think I do crimes They don't know I'm a connoisseur of hip-hop rhymes Some smile, try to L.L. a hoodlum at times But he don't my autograph's on his wife's behind
L.L. has iced all the up slobs of rap so to hell with the mob Don't run the cops, making suckers jock And I'm only 18 making more than your
Tormentor of toys and boys And I dare any to call it noise Peeped at the clock, it said later to Creator and broke out with E
Went up to White Castle for a shake Thinking a 100'000 that I'd soon make Finished up the snack, up, out my seat E-Love hit the and he made up a beat
Kicked a few lines, stepped out the Since tonight is a bore I'm in the for more We jumped in my ride, I took a at the time It was almost 7:30 and the was at nine
L.L. J will soon stand at a jam With of people screaming, "Touch my hand" But since I had a hour a half for tat I was searching for the cutie who's my perfect
Her name was Renee, her face was But she had the kinda body that made Jay wanna I said, "No need to rehearse", then I made my Said, "You got a good team, girl but you a new coach"
Said, "My name's L.L.Cool, if I may But I'm not for conversation, I'm here to seduce Wanna mix it up baby, feel you grind 'Cause it ain't 5th grade and these ain't rhymes"
"And I that you adore my sure side hardcore Check out the L.L. behind closed doors So tell your buddies you're busy, tell your boyfriend it Forget the silk dress 'cause you ain't need it"
"Unplug clock, do away with the light After five minutes or more you hear me say, that's Your body is bad and I you got a Caddy When we make you can call me daddy"
"I'm L.L. Cool J, say hey, I'm not a but I still wanna play Promise you, I'm not wack when I'm in the that I leave you starving for me to come back"
"But in the meantime, put your digits And the next I see ya I'm going to town" Stepped away the freak, it was a quarter to nine When I rolled to the jam I saw the on line
Took a trip around the side, so I could get If you call me a tiger, then the stage is my I rip, and crush, heavy metal bands rust Them flaky knuckleheads I crumble up crust
Walked in my dressing room and I heard four knocks They said, "L.L., running late and it's time to rock" Told Cut Creator what the would be Then I said "Lord have mercy" and slapped with E onstage, I heard the girlies scream And that's the very moment I up from the dream