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It was time to make the it was very very early
It was 2:37 in the
I turned off my alarm clock and I stumbled several
boxes and my girlfriend on the way to the bathroom
While I for the fluorescent lights
To flicker on I I saw in the dark...
Something was up and I tell what
But my mind got the there was something to see
So I shut my eyes to squeeze the
Out of the back of my head but I missed my
The lights were on now and I couldn't
There was a in the mirror and he was staring at me

Don't get me
I'm not about some kind of figurative stranger here
No existential bullshit from or Billy Joel
I'm not saying I didn't recognize in the mirror
Or that I didn't like the of person I saw
No I'm talking about an actual kind of stranger here
the villain in issue 104 of the Flash
There was no this was not your everyday reflection
This was middle aged balding Jewish guy and he had a moustache
There's a stranger in my mirror there's a new on the wall
After that incident I thought that I'd seen it all
Things like this are always to me
Well I stood there looking in my twenty-dollar bathrobe
With my Indicator toothbrush sticking in between my
My eyes just opened wider when I looked back in the
And saw the stranger with his staring back in disbelief
Then I ran my down the length of the mirror
To see if the stranger would follow my
Our actions in perfect synch
And I just exactly who was in control
So I grabbed my girlfriend's Lady Bic
And ran it down the length of my to see if he would bleed
Blood was flowing from of our cheeks
But I couldn't tell whose blood was in my bowl

I am enough to be this old bald fat guy's son
I've even met an Arab and I don't even own a gun
Things this are always happening to me
There was that time when the shopping mall devoured my Sue
And when my pet turned to stone I didn't know what to do
I scolded my from behind my mirrored shield
That was the same week Veidt removed my intrinsic field
I had to lose
So I played the
It was run by Jackson
I said, "Put those stones,"
dropped my canary
I had a in a convent
said, "Get thee to a nunnery."
And another friend who stuttered and quoted
I had a girl in New City
were all killed by the Invunche
Or the time when I awoke from dreams
transformed in my bed into a vermin
And those days each August when my shadow
is replaced by of Ethel Merman
I'd love to tell these stories and I'm sure you like to
But right now I've got to face this in my mirror
Well it was all quite interesting to have my
But it was boring and I had to use the loo
So I leaned into the mirror and then I leaned a little
And then I leaned a little closer and quietly said, "Boo!"
Well the stranger grabbed his and heaved and wheezed and choked
And hemorrhaged and fell on the
I tried to help him but unfortunately I lacked the ability to
solid objects like mirrors
And even if I could I don't CPR
So I hit the and then quietly walked out the door
I could til tomorrow to shave
Or maybe I'll just give it up and a beard
Or a moustache like the guy who's inside of my mirror

There's a dead guy in my there's a dead guy on the floor
I hope to God that I won't see that dead guy
Things like this are happening to me
If a moral to this story
Then I'd really like to hear what you it is
(Tell me the moral me the moral
Tell me the moral me the moral)
Like if there's a stranger in your
know which side of the room is his
(That's not a moral that's not a
me the moral tell me the moral)
How about ever try to shave while under fluorescent lights
You know that a fact
(I was hoping you say something like
"Nothing in this world is as it appears")
Or go frightening bald fat Jewish guys
If you want them having heart attacks
more like it and I guess that concludes
Our overlength adventures the man in the mirror

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