Luyện nghe bài hát Story of Reuben Clamzo & His Strange...

by Arlo

Wanna hear something? You that Indians never ate
clams. They have linguini! And so what happened
was that was allowed to grow unmolested in the
waters of America for millions of years. And
they got big, and I talking about clams in
general, I'm about each clam! I mean each one
was a couple of million years old or older. So
they have got bigger than this whole room. And
when they get that big, God gives little feet so
that they could walk around easier. And when get
feet, they get dangerous. I'm about real
dangerous. I ain't about sitting under the
water waiting for you. I'm about coming after
you.

being on one of them boats coming over to
discover America, like Columbus or something,
there at night on watch, everyone else is drunk
or asleep. And you're for America and the
going up and down. And you don't like it anyhow.
But you gotta there and watch, for what. Only he
knows, and he ain't watching. You the waves
lapping against the side of the ship. The is
going behind the clouds. You hear the pitter of
footprints on deck. IS THAT YOU KIDS? IT AIN'T.
MY GOD. IT'S THIS GIANT CLAM!

Imagine those feet coming on deck. A clam twice
the size of the ship. Feet first. You're
there shivering with fear, you one of these. This
is a belaying pin. They used to have stuck in
the holes all around the ship ..you didn't
know this is for; you probably had an idea, but
you wrong. They used to have these stuck in the
all along the sides of the ship. Everywhere.
You wouldn't know what this is for unless you was
guy night.

I mean, you'd this out of the hole, run on over
there, BAM BAM on them little feet! into the
ocean go a hurt, but not defeated, humungus
giant clam. Ready to strike again when
was better.

You not even the coastal villages was safe from
them big clams. You know them big clams had an
range of 15 miles. Think of that. I mean our
early pioneers and the settlers little houses
all up and the coast you know. A little inland
and stuff like that And they have houses like
we got now, with bathrooms and stuff. They little
privies out back. And at night, maybe a kid would
have to go, and he'd go out there in the
moonlight. And all hear for miles around...
(loud clap/belch)....one kid for America. One more
smiling, smurking, humungus clam.

So Americans built forts. forts. You know them
pictures of them with the wooden points all
around. You probably them points was for Indians.
But that's stupid! 'Cause know about doors. But
clams didn't. Even if a clam about a door, so what?
A couldn't fit in a door. I mean, he'd come stomping
up to a fort at night, put them feet on points, jump
back crying, coming out of them everywhere. But
couldn't live in forts forever. You couldn't
just one big fort around America. How would you go
to the

So what they did was they formed of people. I mean
they had groups of all up and down the coast form
these alliances. Like up North it was call the
Clamshell Alliance. And farther South is was called
the Catfish Alliance. They had these all up and
down the coast defending themselves against
threatening monsters. These humungus clams. And
they'd go out there, if was maybe fifteen of them,
they'd be singing songs in fifteen harmony. And when
one disappeared, that's how they knew where the clam
be.

Which is why Americans only sing in four harmony to
very day. That proved to be too dangerous. See, what
they did was be singing these songs called Clam
Chanties, and they'd have big spears called clampoons.
And they'd be walking up and the beach and the method
they eventually where they'd have this guy, the
most heavy duty true blue American, courageous
type dude they find and they'd have him out there
walking up and the beach by himself with other chicken
dudes behind the sand dunes somewhere.

He'd be singing the verses. They'd be the chorus.
And clams would hear 'em. And clams music. So clams
would out of the water and they'd come after this one
guy. And all you'd see pretty was flying all over,
the sand flying


FINALLYTHEMANWOULD over a big sand dune, roll over
the side, the clam would come over the dune, in the
hole and fourteen guys would come out and stab the
out of him with their clampoons.

That's the way it was. That was one way to with them.
The other way was to weld two clams together. l
it. I'm losing it. Hey. What can you do. Another
night to hell.

Hey, this was back then. This was very serious.
I mean these songs now are just piddley songs. But
back then these songs controversial. These was
radical, almost revolutionary songs. times was
different and clams was a threat to America. right.
So we want to sing this tonight about the one last...
You see what did was there was one man, he was one
of these men, his name always be remembered, his
name was Clamzo, and he was one of the last great
clam men there ever was. He stuck the last stab,
the last into the last clam that was ever seen
on continent.

he would be out of work in an hour. He did it
anyway so that you and me go to the beach in
safety. That's right. Made America safe for the
likes of you and me. And so we sing this in his
memory. He went whaling like most of them guys did.
And he got out of that when he died. You know, was
much more dangerous whales. Clams can run in the
water, on the or on the ground, and they are so big
that they can jump and they can spread their
kinda shells and kinda almost fly like one of them
squirrels.

You be standing there thinking that your perfectly
and all of a sudden WHOP....That's ' true...And so
this is the song of this guy by the name of Clamzo,
and the song takes place right after he this clam
and the clam was, through this kinda death dance
over on the side somewhere. The song there and he
goes into whaling and you through the I next...

I sing the part of the guy on the by himself. I go
like this: "Poor old Clamzo" and you go "Clamzo Boys,
Clamzo". That's the part of the fourteen dudes over
on the other side. what they used to sing. They'd be
these clams out of the water. Like taunting them,
making fun of them. Clams would get mad and come out.

Here we go. I want you to sing it in case you ever an
occasion to join an Alliance. You know some of these
Alliances are still around. Still defending America
things them clams. If you ever wants to join one, now
you have some historic background. So you know where
guys are coming from. It's not some 60's movement or
something, things go back a long time.

Notice the distinction you're to have to make now
between the and easy "Clamzo Boys Clamzo" and the
more "Clamzo Me Boys Clamzo". Stay serious.
songs are serious. That's what Pete Seeger told me.
"Arlo I only to tell you one thing...folk songs are
serious". I said "right". do it in C for Clam...
Iet's do it in B...for boy that's a big clam... s do
it in G for Gee, I hope that big don't see me. Let's
do it in F...for he sees me. do it back in A...for A
clam is coming. Better get this song done quick. The
of Reuben and His Strange Daughter in the Key of A.

1. Oh poor old Reuben
(I) boys Clamzo
Oh old Reuben Clamzo
(II) Clamzo me boys

2. Oh, was no sailor
(Clamzo Clamzo) (Refrain I)
So they shipped him on a
(Clamzo me Clamzo) (Refrain II)

3. Because he was no (Ref. I)
He would not do his (Ref. II)

4. he was so dirty (Ref. I)
We gave him five and (Ref. II)

5. Oh Reuben Clamzo's (Ref. I)
She her dad for mercy (Ref. II)

6 She brang him wine and (Ref. I)
And a bit more she oughta (Ref. II)

7 Well he got his seaman's (Ref. I)
a terror to the whalers (Ref. II)

8.And he where 'er the whalefish blow (Ref I)
As the hardest on the go (Ref. II)

9 Oh poor old Clamzo (Ref. I)
Oh old Reuben Clamzo (Ref. II)