Luyện nghe bài hát Story of Reuben Clamzo & His Strange...

by Guthrie

Wanna hear something? You that Indians never ate
clams. didn't have linguini! And so what happened
was that clams was allowed to grow in the
coastal waters of for millions of years. And
they got big, and I talking about clams in
general, I'm talking each clam! I mean each one
was a couple of million old or older. So imagine
they could have got bigger than whole room. And
they get that big, God gives them little feet so
that they could around easier. And when they get
feet, they get dangerous. I'm talking about
dangerous. I ain't talking about under the
waiting for you. I'm talking about coming after
you.

Imagine being on one of them boats coming to
discover America, like Columbus or something,
there at night on watch, everyone else is drunk
or asleep. And you're for America and the
boat's up and down. And you don't like it anyhow.
But you gotta there and watch, for what. Only he
knows, and he watching. You hear the waves
lapping the side of the ship. The moon is
behind the clouds. You hear the pitter patter of
little on deck. IS THAT YOU KIDS? IT AIN'T.
MY GOD. THIS HUMUNGUS GIANT CLAM!

Imagine those little feet on deck. A clam twice
the of the ship. Feet first. You're standing
there with fear, you grab one of these. This
is a belaying pin. They to have these stuck in
the holes all around the ..you probably didn't
know what this is you probably had an idea, but
you wrong. They used to have these stuck in the
holes all along the of the ship. Everywhere.
You wouldn't know this is for unless you was that
guy night.

I mean, you'd grab this out of the hole, run on
there, BAM BAM on them little feet! back the
ocean go a hurt, but not defeated, humungus
clam. Ready to strike again when opportunity
was better.

You know not the coastal villages was safe from
them big clams. You them big clams had an inland
range of about 15 miles. of that. I mean our
early and the settlers built little houses
all up and the coast you know. A little inland
and like that And they didn't have houses like
we got now, with bathrooms and stuff. built little
out back. And late at night, maybe a kid would
have to go, and he'd go stomping out in the
moonlight. And all hear for miles around...
(loud clap/belch)....one kid for America. One more
smiling, smurking, giant clam.

So Americans built forts. forts. You know them
pictures of forts with the wooden points all
around. You probably thought them was for Indians.
But that's stupid! 'Cause Indians about doors. But
clams didn't. if a clam knew about a door, so what?
A couldn't fit in a door. I mean, he'd come stomping
up to a fort at night, put them on them points, jump
crying, tears coming out of them everywhere. But
Americans couldn't in forts forever. You couldn't
just build one big fort around America. How you go
to the

So what did was they formed groups of people. I mean
they had groups of people all up and the coast form
these little alliances. Like up North it was the
Clamshell Alliance. And farther down is was called
the Catfish Alliance. They had Alliances all up and
down the defending themselves against these
threatening monsters. These humungus clams. And
they'd go out there, if was maybe fifteen of them,
they'd be singing songs in fifteen harmony. And when
one part disappeared, that's how they knew where the
be.

Which is why Americans only sing in four harmony to
this very day. That to be too dangerous. See, what
they did was they'd be singing these songs Clam
Chanties, and have these big spears called clampoons.
And they'd be up and down the beach and the method
they eventually devised where have this guy, the
strongest heavy duty true blue American, courageous
type dude they could find and they'd have him out
walking up and the beach by himself with other chicken
dudes hiding behind the dunes somewhere.

He'd be singing the verses. be singing the chorus.
And clams would hear 'em. And clams music. So clams
would come out of the water and come after this one
guy. And all see pretty soon was flying all over,
the sand flying


FINALLYTHEMANWOULD jump over a big sand dune, over
the side, the clam come over the dune, fall in the
hole and fourteen guys would come out there and the
shit out of him with clampoons.

the way it was. That was one way to deal with them.
The way was to weld two clams together. l don't
believe it. I'm losing it. Hey. What can you do.
shot to hell.

Hey, this was serious back then. was very serious.
I these songs now are just piddley folk songs. But
back then these songs were controversial. was
radical, almost revolutionary songs. Because was
different and was a threat to America. That's right.
So we to sing this song tonight about the one last...
You see what did was there was one man, he was one
of these men, his name will be remembered, his
was Reuben Clamzo, and he was one of the last great
clam men there ever was. He the last clam stab,
the last clampoon into the clam that was ever seen
on continent.

Knowing he would be out of in an hour. He did it
anyway so you and me could go to the beach in
safety. That's right. Made America safe for the
likes of you and me. And so we sing song in his
memory. He went into whaling most of them guys did.
And he got out of when he died. You know, clams was
much dangerous than whales. Clams can run in the
water, on the water or on the ground, and are so big
sometimes that they can jump and they can spread
shells and kinda almost fly like one of them flying
squirrels.

You could be standing thinking that your perfectly
and all of a sudden WHOP....That's ' true...And so
this is the of this guy by the name of Reuben Clamzo,
and the takes place right after he stabbed this clam
and the clam was, going this kinda death dance
on the side somewhere. The song starts there and he
goes into whaling and you through the I next...

I the part of the guy on the beach by himself. I go
this: "Poor old Reuben Clamzo" and you go "Clamzo Boys,
Clamzo". That's the part of the fourteen chicken over
on the other side. That's what used to sing. They'd be
these clams out of the water. Like taunting them,
making fun of them. would get real mad and come out.

Here we go. I want you to sing it in case you have an
occasion to join such an Alliance. You some of these
Alliances are around. Still defending America against
things like them clams. If you wants to join one, now
you have some historic background. So you know where
guys are coming from. It's not just some movement or
something, these go back a long time.

Notice the distinction you're going to have to now
the first and easy "Clamzo Boys Clamzo" and the
more complicated "Clamzo Me Boys Clamzo". serious.
Folk songs are serious. That's what Pete Seeger me.
"Arlo I only to tell you one thing...folk songs are
serious". I said "right". do it in C for Clam...
do it in B...for boy that's a big clam... Iet' s do
it in G for Gee, I hope that big clam see me. Let's
do it in F...for he me. Let's do it back in A...for A
is coming. Better get this song done quick. The Story
of Reuben Clamzo and His Strange in the Key of A.

1. Oh poor old Clamzo
(I) Clamzo Clamzo
Oh old Reuben Clamzo
(II) Clamzo me boys

2. Oh, was no sailor
(Clamzo Clamzo) (Refrain I)
So they him on a whaler
(Clamzo me Clamzo) (Refrain II)

3. he was no beauty (Ref. I)
He would not do his (Ref. II)

4. he was so dirty (Ref. I)
We gave him and thirty (Ref. II)

5. Oh Reuben daughter (Ref. I)
She begged her dad for (Ref. II)

6 She him wine and water (Ref. I)
And a bit than she oughta (Ref. II)

7 he got his seaman's papers (Ref. I)
He's a terror to the (Ref. II)

8.And he where 'er the whalefish blow (Ref I)
As the hardest on the go (Ref. II)

9 Oh old Reuben Clamzo (Ref. I)
Oh poor old Clamzo (Ref. II)