I own a mansion, but live in a A king-size bed, but I on the couch I'm Mr.Brightside, glass is half But my tank is half empty, just blew
This happens, thirty minutes from home Gotta lay a log and only option I have is McDonald's bathroom In a public stall dropping a So every someone walks in the john I get Madden ''Shady, what What? Come on, man, I'm crapping And asking me for my got damn autograph on a napkin? Oh, that's odd, I just to run out of tissue Yeah, hand me that, on second thought I'd be glad ''Thanks, dawg, name's Todd, a big I my ass with it, crumbled it up in a wad and threw it back and Told him ''Todd, you're the shit'' when does all of crap end? Can't park my ass causing an accident Puff my gas, cut my grass, can't out the fucking trash someone passing through my sub harassing I'd my blessings, but I suck at math I'd rather wallow then bass from succotash But the is my stomach gas I mix my corn with my mash Potato, so what, ho, kiss my bumpkin ass Missouri Southern roots, the fuck is upperclass Call dinner, call dinner supper Tupperware in a covered plastic up the ass Stuck in the past, iPod, what the fuck is B-boy to the core, mule, I'm a ass
Maybe that's why I so strange Got it all, but I won't change Maybe that's why I can't Detroit It's the that keeps me going This is the inspiration I I can never turn my on a city that made me (Life's been to me so far)
They call me classless, I heard that, I second and that Don't what the fuck I would doing if it weren't rap Probably be a turd-sack But I blew, never turned Turned forty and sag Teenagers act more fucking mature, you gonna say to me? I on my own terms, asshole, I'm going berzerk My nerves are bad, but I love the my work has I get to meet famous people, at her, dag Her nylons ran, her skirt And I heard she drag-races, *burp* Fucking my shirt tag You're Danica Patrick (yeah) work, be the perfect match 'Cause you're a vacuum, I'm a My apologies, no disrespect to But the heck is all of these buttons? You expect me to sit here and learn Fuck I gotta do to this new song from Luda? Be an expert at I'd be an encyclopedia Britannica, hell with a Playstation I'm still on my first from Zelda Nintendo, bitch, run, jump, punch, stab and I the on my spaghetti, put in on bread Make a sandwich with and belch They say this butter is bad for my health, but I think there's more trash from the trailer Jed Clampett, Redd welfare mentality helps to Keep me grounded, that's why I take full advantage of wealth, I Managed to dwell within parameters cramming the shelves full of hamburger helper I can't even help it, is the hand I was dealt to Creature of habit, feel like I'm trapped in an shelter With all these pet God to hell, I can't stand all these kids with their camera cellphones I go anywhere, I get so mad I can yell, the Other day got little elaborate and stuck a fucking dead cat in my mailbox to Burger King, they spit on my onion rings I think my karma is catching up me
that's why I feel so strange Got it all, but I still change Maybe that's why I can't Detroit It's the motivation that keeps me This is the inspiration I I can never my back on a city that made me (Life's been to me so far)
Got friends on Facebook, all over the Not sure what that means, they tell me good So I'm artist of the decade, I got a plaque I'd hang it up, but the frame is all
I'm trying to be lowkey, hopefully nobody me In produce hunched over, giant Over stop as I mosey over to the aisle By the yogurt this guy approached me Embarrassed, I just did Comerica Hova Show's over, I'm hiding in Kroeger groceries He just had front row seats, told me to sign poster Then me "wow, up close didn't know you had crow's feet" I'm at a crossroad till shopping at Costco Sloppy Joe's, waffles Got caught my nose, ah Look over see two hot hoes still up in one of my nostrils Right next to 'em at the light fucking shit is taking forever to change I'm stuck, these bitches are loving it it in Chuckling, do nothing, play it off ''What you bumping? Trunk Muzik? Yelawolf's better'', fucking They want me to flip at the label, but I won't to it The pressure, they want me to follow up with another one after Was so highly coveted, but what good is a fucking recovery if I it? I'mma drop the ball if I don't get a grip Hopping on shrubbery on you sons of Wrong to fuck with, bitch Quit snapping fucking of my kids I love my city, but you me to my limit, what a pity The I complain about It's like there ain't a in the sky and it's raining out Aid stain on the couch, I'd never get it out Bitch, I got an in my house and a mouse, I'm living the dream
Maybe that's why I so strange Got it all, but I still change Maybe that's why I can't leave It's the that keeps me going is the inspiration I need I can never turn my back on a city that me (Life's good to me so far)