Luyện nghe bài hát SaaSholes

I'm sick and of all these SaaSHoles
Fake motherfuckers, just about
ain't nothing wrong with monetizing shit
But a hockey stick won't fix a tiny

Worst of all
Dumbest motherfuckers playing
Whoring it up on social
They'd sell their for uh Wikipedia

(I guess B2B stands for Bullshit 2 Bullshit)

Doing fake work to pass the
Going to conferences, pretending to
Strung out on addies, toothless
Jacking off ta booth babes; their useless

Scooters,
Riding around with them Apple
Need another big valuation to get suitors
chased by dickhead recruiters

Gentrifying the city, real uprooters
Laptop got an iPad and other minicomputers
But they got real Scooters
Scooters, Scooters,

(Are you into I'm not a stalker by the way)

SaaSHoles, the assholes
I'm not talking 'bout no billionaire
This is for all you wantrepreneurs
And tech losers (F***ing losers!)

Talkin bout employee count instead of burn
Buy a lot of hoodies trying to
pour your retirement money down the drain
No SaaShole's ever gonna make that VC money

(Wait: how can 30,000 all be 30 under 30? Uhhhh)

Propping up decks with stats
Trying to all them crypto cats
Too ratchet for the One Cafe
Wait, Soylent isn't

(I didn't know MRR stood for Realistic Regalia?!)

SaasHoles!
Dance for VC money, Like a stripper working them
SaasHoles!
Vanity metrics matching their goals
SaasHoles!
those cougars down at the Rosewood glory holes
SaasHoles!
They'll eat your like black holes, black holes, black holes, black holes
SaasHoles!
And Don't forget to feed the trolls! You don't know where money goes
SaasHoles!
They're just assholes! Mother f***ing, f***ing SaasHoles

(I a pindick, but I really like you)

SaaSHoles, the real
This is what happens when yah give millions to average

(Are you guys seriously out of Jersey Give me the Dorkins)

Buying designer chickens Pharaohs
Working in a basement no windows
Oh no, another overdose!
Too much he went comatose!
(Wake up bro! up!)

Liz used to generate big cash
Big hockey stick on all her
...but THEN: her company
(Wait, are you about Theranos?)
there grandpa's retirement goes
That blood money shows
Now grandpa has to at Lowe's

SaasHoles!
Scooters,
Riding around with them Apple
Need another big valuation (SaasHoles!) to get suitors
Getting chased by recruiters
SaasHoles!

Gentrifying the city, like uprooters
Laptop bag's got an iPad (SaasHoles!) and minicomputers
(SaasHoles!)
But they got real cool
Scooters,
SaasHoles!