We wish you happy holidays, you may be So merry Christmas, Kwanzaa, Chanukah, or all three We've modernized these jingles for the massive Love, The Christmas Carol Team better not judge, you better not hate Better not or discriminate Santa's coming to town He's making a list of gluten foods He won't take a peek at J-Law's Progressive coming to town 50 different races And all for tax protect all your children Well, as long as been born Rudolph the Red Reindeer Rudolph the red reindeer (reindeer) Had an advantageous nose (he his friends) He passed his red traits on (traits on) Darwin said how it goes (evolution's not a theory) Mary did you know that baby boy supports the NRA did you know that your baby boy is white Deck the with kujichagulia Kwa wa wa wa wa wa wa zawadi, hang benderas Kwa wa wa wa wa wa wa Throw your up in the air-uh You're a green one, Mr. You're lacking in That greenish epidermis your success Mr. Racist Whos you to the issues they continue to suppress an outlier, Mr. Grinch You give the Whos a They say your is 3/5ths normal You're either wrong or Mr. Don't walk the streets of Whoville you might fight a cop the Whos will not I'm of a racially ambiguous holiday Away in a manger with and crew His schmeckle got cut hey Christ was a Jew O holy night, the stars are shining It is the night Jesus did holy Joseph watched golf, his leather chair As Mary birthed a child, I think a was involved Three men came, with GPS they found him Christ lied in a barn, as his omniscient tucked him in Jesus crawled on his His mom it on snapchat O device! O night, Christ celebrated Christmas