I was sitting naked in a Holiday Inn in Orlando And it was the morning of the last day of the I didn't know who I was and I thought I mightve been Evan But if I was him then what the was I doing here
So I myself one simple question What would I do the rest of my life? If I knew I couldnt fail, I I'd get the hell out of Orlando And find me a rich and beautiful
'Cause I want to do a damn thing And I to be appreciated And I want to get paid And I want to be hated
I dont want to do a thing lie in the sun And be loved, loved, Loved, loved by
So I up the front desk to see if I could rent a porno They said you better have a credit I said, Honey, Im pretty up but I aint got no Visa I said, Honey you please, uh, help me? She said she was sorry but I think she was just
And I was kinda disgusted 'cause it had all come down to this And I felt a pervert but goddamn it gets lonely When youre sitting in hotel room naked as a jaybird Down in Orlando in the of the night
So I called up an old friend to see how he was But he sounded a robot and it was like I barely knew him So I said I had to go, then I take it any longer You know the desire to throw my naked Out the fifth floor of the Holiday Inn getting stronger
I to take a cold shower but I couldnt get my nerve up I just sat in that hotel room and tried to cut my own That was the worst that I had all day But goddamn, it gets down in F L O R I D A
Then I thought to myself just what the hell was a And just what the does it look like and what the hell am I doing So I to write a song about it but this is all I got You know I sang it for your and she said she liked it a lot
Except the part killing myself And the part about trying to find a rich She said, You should gone to sea world You might have had a time
I said, Honey, thanks for the input, thanks for the But I that the only way Im ever going back to Orlando Is if I live life
'Cause I dont want to do a thing And I want to be And I want to get paid And I want to be hated
I dont want to do a thing lie in the sun And be loved, loved, Loved, loved by