I was sitting naked in a Inn down in Orlando And it was the morning of the day of the year I know who I was and I thought I mightve been Evan Dando But if I was him then what the was I doing here
So I asked one simple question would I do with the rest of my life? If I knew I couldnt fail, I guess I'd get the hell out of And find me a rich and wife
'Cause I dont want to do a damn And I want to be And I want to get paid And I want to be hated
I dont want to do a thing lie in the sun And be loved, loved, Loved, loved by
So I called up the front desk to see if I rent a porno They said you better a credit card I said, Honey, Im hard up but I aint got no Visa I said, Honey you please, uh, help me? She said she was but I think she was just disgusted
And I was kinda disgusted myself 'cause it had all come to this And I felt like a but goddamn it gets lonely When youre sitting in your hotel naked as a jaybird Down in Orlando in the of the night
So I up an old friend to see how he was doing But he sounded like a robot and it was like I barely him So I said I had to go, then I couldnt it any longer You the desire to throw my naked body Out the fifth floor of the Inn kept getting stronger
I to take a cold shower but I couldnt get my nerve up I just sat in that hotel room and to cut my own hair That was the worst idea I had all day But goddamn, it gets lonely in F L O R I D A
Then I to myself just what the hell was a jaybird And just the hell does it look like and what the hell am I doing So I tried to write a song about it but is all I got You know I sang it for your girlfriend and she she liked it a lot
Except the part killing myself And the part about trying to find a rich She said, You should have to sea world You might have had a better
I said, Honey, thanks for the input, thanks for the But I think that the only way Im going back to Orlando Is if I live twice
'Cause I want to do a damn thing And I to be appreciated And I want to get paid And I want to be hated
I dont want to do a damn lie in the sun And be loved, loved, Loved, loved by