My Brother

Phaugh... There's something wrong round here,
what is it
Ohh! it's you
COME HERE AND SIT DOWN,
YOUR GONNA HAVE THE TRUTH
TOLD ABOUT YOU AND PUT ON RECORD.

'ERE PLEASE DON'T SIT TOO CLOSE TO ME
BECAUSE I'VE JUST HAD MY BREAKFAST...
THANK-YOU
Who put salt in the sugar bowl
Who put fireworks in the coal
Who put a real live toad in the hole
MY BROTHER
Who put jam in mothers shoe
Who made real caterpillars stew
Who locked Grandad in the loo
MY BROTHER
My brother said it wasn't he
who put shampoo in Grandma's tea
My brother said that it was me
My brothers rotten
Who squeezed toothpaste round the hall
Who put soot in the baby's b###
Who drew things on the garden wall
MY BROTHER
You autha see what he drew.
auhh what a surprise
nobody knew what it was realy
but everybody had a good idea
and he wrote slogans
"Down with young mothers" that was one
'cause he don't think our mum knows
how to bring us up right
I don't think so either
you know
every night when we're wide awake,
she makes us go to bed, and
every morning when we're fast asleep
she makes us get up
Whos pet mouse made autnie shreik
Who ate glue and couldn't speak
What clever dick was sick for a week
MY BROTHER
Who keeps maggots in a tin
Plays the twist on his violin
Whos been gettin' at the gin
MY BROTHER
He looks just like a chimney sweep
but dirt they say is just skin deep
I know he's good when he's asleep!
but you don't know what he's dreamin' about (do ya)
Who wouldn't mind if I ride his bike
Who lets me shot his gun if I like
Who says I'm best at Football, Ludo, Snakes & Ladders
Hide & Seek, Chasin' each other up and down the garden
pinchin' little girls up the high street
Well he's gotta say I'm best
'cause I'm bigger than he is and if he don't say I'm best
at everything I'll bash him. HaHa
MY LOVELY LOVELY BROTHER
come on, come on mate, lets get out of here
bofore you fall down the hole in the middle
come on give us your hand' we're gonna wal...
'ere what you had in your hand
'ave ya
Corrrrr!!!!!