Literal Assassins Creed 4: Black Flag Trailer

Stargate, sparkle, Ubisoft.
Nod at the boat and people die everywhere, people die (that's a call back).
This is the longest he's ever gone without killing anyone.
He wonders if his future son will carry out the tradition of killing everyone one he sees.
It's his lunch break luckily.
Toast of Equality!
Hurry with the toast, there's a drunken hot girl walking to the right,
Bet she'd love to see a fight...
Bad guy music begins as the pony tail twins barge in,
Look down on the people that you're better than.
Ominous orchestral note, time to let the patrons know Happy Hour's over,
Time for everything to suck.
Mysterious hooded man watches (from a distance)
Take a second to sober up (low tolerance)
Target confirmed.
Hooded man turns
Bandana man sees hooded mans subtle arm movement signal, which tells him to go make a toast to the people.
And then he lets all of them know, it was a toast to DEATH!
You shouldn't toast before you know what the toast is for.
Bear hug, head bash, bottle smash
Slow-mo person pass stab face
Again and again and again.
Another wine bottle pass in slow motion
Hooded man feels good
Hey! Dont touch the hood
If you try to stab the hoodless man, he'll stab you in the abdomen, man.
And steal your wallet. Duh.
Look right!
Colonial running shoe commercial
They thought they could catch the boat
Not even close.
Captain walk to the edge of the dock, snap turn, let's go!
Chase that freaking boat sailed by Heath Ledger's ancestor.
Celebrate, sail into the sunset, fade.
The captains not about to let the bird-bow-boat get away.
Gimme that telescope. Give it!
Use the mini telescope
Aim the cannon at the boat, shoot four, only two go through
Maybe two were blanks?
Strike a pose, Edward turns the boat
Red cloaked captain probably should've let that bird-boat go
Oh no!
Cannons not shooting blanks anymore!
DARKNESS!
Murder Hood goes on.
Inception bwaah
Someone's gonna get splinters
And second hand smoke
Im just sayin', be careful
Watch out for the hooks!
Ooh! Should've listened
Edward wants to ascend
Shoot your gun to cut the rope, just to make it difficult
Flying up to run away, no more murdering today...
NOT!
Can't believe they bought that
Same thing goes for all their hats
I prefer my Murder Hood, people die 'cause I look so good
D-rop the pistols
Throw a stick
His friend makes sure his death is quick
Guess I'll do the same for you! (Assuming you want me to!)
This is gonna end badly for you
It already has for your crew
Listen, I'll give you some free ones. DEEAHH! DAAHH!
Convincing enough?
Look you disarmed me, now I am completely defenseless!
NOT!
Booyah!
Last words: Port or Starboard?
Assassins Creed 4: Black Flag
Cut to Kenway's boat sitting in a bay
Ever since I got this diamond filled with DNA, it feels like someones watching me
DeliCIA