I woke up, some sweat pants on Then I fed my cat and I walked to the mart And I really want a donut, shouldn't get a Bought a donut, fuck it man it's really Supposed to be on a diet, I be like Ryan He thirty pounds on that paleo But fuck it man I love shit I was gonna get for the summer I was start doing my crunches But looking at my stomach I'mma go to the beach, but I'm not my shirt off in public My girl shaped like a bottle of Me? I'm like a bottle of nope I'd like to a hot dog, some bon bons A large soda, and tacos to go
I never knew a carbohydrate was Turns out it's all the snacks I love
I wanna be like Hugh Jackman, you know man a really huge package I wanna be the Batman And Ben Affleck packing If you ain't gonna treat Garner right You don't to have that You better pass that to the Matt Damon He eat the like Pac Man
You know I feel good about place You know I feel good about this You know I feel good about shake You know I good about these plates You know I feel good about crepes You know I good about this cake You know I just love how it I'm not gonna wait, I'm not tripping my weight, no
Happy New Everybody got a But the next day, we forget it never do 'em I to the gym and got a membership Five on the treadmill and I never lift That was four years ago I should probably this But they me I gotta do it in person, ain't that a bitch? But tomorrow though, get fit Get me a band and a fit-bit Get me workout shoes, and a bench press lulu lemons and a french press I'mma focus do some private yoga my shoulders, I'mma hide the donuts Realign my posture, no for sofas I'm finally sober no Coronas But again, that's And today man I gotta go big it's my last day Before I lose that weight, I get one last plate and go big I ate all night, on ice I up and I felt like shit And I said, "you what, man fuck it I should probably on Monday instead" let's eat
You know I feel good about place You know I feel good about steak You I feel good about this shake You I feel good about these plates You know I good about this crepes You know I feel about this cake You know I just love how it I'm not wait, I'm not tripping about my weight, no