Kickapoo (SNL Version)

A long ass freaking time ago
In a town called Kickapoo
There lived a humble family
Religious through and through
But yay, there was a black sheep
And he knew just what to do

His name was young J.B.
And he refused to step in line
A vision he did see-eth
Freaking rocking all the time
He wrote a tasty jam
And all the planets did align

Oh, the dragon's boards were blazing
As I stepped into his cave
Then I sliced his freaking cockles
With a long and shiny blade

'Twas I who bugged the dragon
Buckalizing buckaloo
And if you try to buck with me
Then I shall buck you too

Gotta get it on in the party zone
I gotta lock and load in the party zone
Gotta lick a toad in the party zone
Gotta break the code in the party zone

You've disobeyed my orders, son
Why were you ever born?
Your brother's ten times better than you
Jesus loves him more

This music that you play for us
Comes from the depths of Hell
Rock 'n' roll's the Devil's work
He wants you to rebel

You'll become a mindless puppet
Beelzebub will pull the strings
Your heart will lose direction
And chaos, it will bring

You'd better shut your mouth
You better watch your tone
You're going for a week
With no telephone

Don't wanna hear you cry
Don't let me hear you moan
You gotta praise The Lord
When you're in my home

Dio, can you hear me?
I am lost and so alone
I'm asking for your guidance
Won't you come down from your throne?

I need a tight compadre
Who will teach me how to rock
My father thinks you're evil
But man, he can suck a rock

Rock is not the Devil's work
It's magical and rad
I'll never rock as long as I am
Stuck here with my dad

I hear you, brave young Jables
You are hungry for the rock
But to learn the ancient method
Sacred doors, you must unlock

Escape your father's clutches
And this oppressive neighborhood
On a journey, you must go
To find the land of Hollywood

In The City of Fallen Angels
Where the ocean meets the sand
You will form a strong alliance
And the world's most awesome band

To find your fame and fortune
Through the valley you must walk
You will face your inner demons
Now go, my son and rock

So he bailed from freaking Kickapoo
With hunger in his heart
And he journeyed far and wide
To find the secrets of his art

But in the end, he knew
That he would find his counterpart
Rock, rock, rock