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Bắt đầu làm bài nào

By Roger Brown, O'Lochlainn and Donald Pleasence

I KNOW A PLACE THAT'S BUT SAFE,
WHERE OAK GROW WITH PINE.
WHERE THE BIG BAD WOLF RED RIDING HOOD
AND THEY LAUGH AND GET ALONG FINE.

AND WHEN I THINK OF YOU AND OF ME,
I WONDER YOU A WHICH IS ME.
WHEN THE CLOCK TWELVE,
WILL IT BE FOR ME?

I KNOW A IN THE US OF A,
WHERE THE OF LIBERTY STANDS TALL.
WHERE A FAT PUSSY CAT AND A LITTLE MOUSE
HAPPY AT A BALL.

AND WHEN I THINK OF YOU AND OF ME,
I WONDER WHO'S YOU A IS ME.
WILL THE FAT PUSSY CAT EAT THIS WHITE MOUSE FOR TEA?

SCOUSE SINGS IN TO HIS FRIEND, GEOFFREY THE CAT

DON'T EAT ME, BE FRIENDS,
EAT ME, LET'S BE FRIENDS,
DON'T EAT ME, BE FRIENDS,
EAT ME, LET'S BE FRIENDS.

"THANK YOU, THANK YOU. HERE'S A YOU MAY HAVE HEARD BEFORE, "SNOW UP YOUR NOSE FOR CHRISTMAS". HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYBODY!"

SNOW UP YOUR FOR CHRISTMAS...

SCOUSE LEFT THE STAGE AND JOINED THE CAT AT HIS TABLE.
"I CAN SEE YOU MEAN."
"I YOU WOULD."
"LOOK HERE, WE'VE GOT A LITTLE PLACE, WE CALL IT 'THE DISCATEQUE'. HOW ABOUT A DRINK AND A AND SOME CONVERSATION?"
"WHY NOT?"
"I WILL COME SCRATCHING ON YOUR DOOR."

AFTER MIDNIGHT, SCOUSE HEARD A GENTLE SCRATCH AND FAINT MEOW. GEOFFREY WAS WAITING OUTSIDE.
"WHAT'S THAT GOT THERE?"
"BRITISH BAG. A FEW PRESENTS FOR THE CATS."
"COME ON!"
"WHERE ARE WE GOING?"
"YOU'LL SEE."
ALONG THE MAIN CORRIDOR AND THREE FLIGHTS OF STEPS, TO A LITTLE TRAP DOOR WHICH SWUNG IN EACH DIRECTION. A LITTLE DOOR MARKED 'DANGER! INSPECTION TRAP!'.
"THROUGH HERE."
SCOUSE FELT FALLING THROUGH SPACE. HE LANDED WITH A BUMP.
"YOU, YOU HAD KILLED ME!"
"SUPPOSE SO. KNOW WE ARE?"
"NO?"
"INSPECTION SHAFT. WE'RE ABOVE THE HERE."
"IT'S COLD AND DAMP! IS, IS THE DISCATEQUE?"
"YES, IT'S A FLOOR FOR DANCING."
"WHERE, ARE THE CATS?"
MEOW! MEOW! MEOW!... (cat noises)
"LET'S HAVE LIGHT! THERE'S A MOON! HEAVE-HO! MY HEARTY!"
A SMALL POT HOLE WAS OPENED. COULD SMELL THE SEA.
"WE'RE TO HAVE A DANCE NOW AND AFTER THAT WE'LL SENTENCE YOU!"
"OH, FOR?"
"PRETENDING TO BE A HUMAN BEING. ENGAGE, CHAPS! THE IS ON."
"THERE'S NO MUSIC?"
"WE MAKE THE MUSIC. HEARD OF A CATERWAUL?"