Father: Well Ryan, a big day. Your mom's coming home from the hospital with your new baby sister. : baby sister Father: That's right, sister. Ryan : baby Father: So, uh, I think now is the time for us to go over some safety rules for when you're your new baby sister. Ryan : saftey Father: Okay, number one: Always wash your hands before touching the baby. Ryan : wash Do you know why? : no Father: Well, because sometimes you have germs on your hands and germs are bad for the baby they can make the baby sick. Ryan : germs baby sick Father: That's right, that's right, Ryan. make baby sick. Ryan : germs make the sick Okay, rule number two. Ryan : more Father: Don't feed the anything. Ryan : feed the baby. That's right. Ryan : Well, because the baby needs to eat special baby food. Ryan : Father: Oh...well, food is bad for the baby. : other food bad for the baby Father: right, good. Now, rule number three. : more rules Father: Never take hot water near the baby because hot will burn the baby. Ryan : water bad for the Well, not all water, just hot water, : yes Father: Cause hot water burn the baby. Ryan : i understand, daddy Father: Okay, see glass of water that I'm drinking? : yes Father: Well, this is okay for the baby. : yes Father: Here, the glass. : yes Father: See, nice and cool. : yes Father: Now if this was hot water that would be bad because hot can burn the baby. Ryan : hot water burn Father: Yes, hot burn baby. Ryan : hot water burn Father: Yes, yes, hot burn baby. Ryan : hot water burn baby Yes. Ryan : baby go in swimming pool? Oh no, the swimming pool is okay. Swimming pool water is cool. : yes Father: alright. : yes Father: But the is bad because that water is hot and hot water will burn the baby. Ryan : hot water the baby Yes. Ryan : hot burn the baby Father: Yes. Now say you made a cup of tea, would you take near the baby? Ryan : yea, baby tea Father: No Ryan, uh, I think you get it yet. Ryan : no like tea? Father: Well, I'm sure the will like tea, but what do you make tea with? : ...hot water Father: Right, and did we say about hot water? Ryan : ...oh, hot water burn Yes, hot water burn baby! Ryan : hot water baby! That's right so no tea near the baby. Ryan : hot water burn Yes. Ryan : no take bath? Father: No, bath is warm. Warm is okay. : yes Hot is bad. Ryan : yes...hot water burn Yes, hot water burn baby. Ryan : hot water burn Father: I you're gettin' it! Ryan : hot water burn That's right, Ryan. Ryan : hot water baby NOW DON'T YOU EVER FORGET THAT! Narrator: 30 later! : Hey, Ryan, what are you doing out there? Ryan : Just the discovery channel. : Well, dinner's gonna be ready in about five minutes. Ryan : Aw, baby, aight, I'll be in in a few momentos. Lemme just wind down...(garbled) : Okay, honey! : Yeah. TV : The villagers of Ryan : TV : have a very bizarre and painful way of welcoming infants into the community. : (garbled) TV : Unfortunately, the rate from this ritual is a mortifying 90 percent. : My God. TV : That the Pasquan's low population. : Yeah, it does. TV : On the full moon of Autumn, all the Pasquanian mothers wrap their new-borns in traditional hand painted deerskin,... : Deerskin. TV : ...which have been passed from generation to generation. : That's nice. TV : The entire Pasquan population forms a circle on the sacred battlefield of Chin-Chara. Ryan : TV : Each Pasquanian baby is then passed, hand to hand, the circle... : Wow. TV : ...four times. Ryan : times. TV : for the sun,... : Hmm. TV : ...once for the moon,... : The moon. TV : ...once for the earth,... : The earth. TV : ...and for the wind. : The wind, too. TV : When the babies arrive in their mother's hands, they are marched, in procession, to the Pasquanian natural hot springs... Ryan : TV : ...where the ceremonial purification be completed. Ryan : What are you saying TV : As we watch, the mothers take their progeny out of the shells... : No. TV : ...and them into the steaming water. Ryan : No! No! Hot water baby! Hot water burn baby! That's right, Ryan. Hot water burn baby. Ryan : Hot burn baby! Wife : Ryan! What's going on out Are you okay? Ryan : Hot water baby! Hot water burn most definitely burn baby. Ryan : Hot burn baby! Father: right, Ryan. Hot water burn baby! Ryan : Hot burn baby! You are a bitch, Ryan! Ryan : Hot burn baby! Wife : Ryan, are you Father: Hot burn the baby! Ryan : Hot burn baby! : Ryan! Father: What are you do, whore? : Ryan! Ryan : Hot burn baby! Bitch! Wife : Ryan! going on out there? Ryan : Hot burn baby! Whore! Wife : Who are you to? Bitch! Ryan : I'm to the man! Whore! Ryan : Hot burn baby! : Ryan! Father: Bitch! is a whore!