Father: Well Ryan, tomorrow's a big day. Your mom's coming home from the hospital with your new sister. Ryan : baby Father: That's right, sister. : baby sister Father: So, uh, I think now is the time for us to go over some safety rules for when around your new baby sister. Ryan : rules Father: Okay, rule number one: Always your hands before touching the baby. : wash hands Father: Do you know : no Father: Well, because sometimes you have germs on your hands and germs are bad for the baby they can make the baby sick. Ryan : make baby sick Father: That's right, that's right, Ryan. make baby sick. : germs make the baby sick Father: Okay, number two. Ryan : more Father: Don't the baby anything. Ryan : don't the baby. Father: right. : why? Father: Well, because the needs to eat special baby food. : why? Father: Oh...well, food is bad for the baby. : other food bad for the baby Father: right, good. Now, rule number three. : more rules Father: Never take hot water near the baby because hot will burn the baby. Ryan : water bad for the Well, not all water, just hot water, : yes Father: Cause hot water burn the baby. Ryan : i don't understand, Father: Okay, see this glass of that I'm drinking? : yes Father: Well, this is okay for the baby. : yes Father: Here, the glass. : yes Father: See, nice and cool. : yes Father: Now if this was hot water that would be bad because hot can burn the baby. Ryan : hot water baby? Yes, hot water burn baby. Ryan : hot water burn Father: Yes, yes, hot water baby. Ryan : hot water your baby Yes. Ryan : baby can't go in swimming Father: Oh no, the swimming pool is okay. Swimming water is cool. : yes Father: alright. : yes Father: But the jacuzzi is bad because that water is hot and hot will burn the baby. Ryan : hot water the baby Yes. Ryan : hot water burn the Father: Yes. Now say you made a cup of tea, would you take that near the Ryan : yea, like tea No Ryan, uh, I don't think you get it yet. Ryan : baby no like Father: Well, I'm sure the will like tea, but what do you make tea with? : ...hot water Father: Right, and what did we say hot water? Ryan : ...oh, hot water burn Father: Yes, hot water baby! : hot water burn baby! Father: That's right so no tea the baby. : hot water burn baby Yes. Ryan : baby no take No, bath water is warm. Warm is okay. : yes Hot is bad. Ryan : yes...hot burn baby Father: Yes, hot burn baby. Ryan : hot water burn I think you're gettin' it! Ryan : hot burn baby Father: right, Ryan. Ryan : hot burn baby NOW DON'T YOU EVER FORGET THAT! Narrator: 30 later! : Hey, Ryan, what are you doing out there? Ryan : Just the discovery channel. Wife : Well, gonna be ready in about five minutes. Ryan : Aw, great baby, aight, I'll be in in a few momentos. just wind down...(garbled) : Okay, honey! : Yeah. TV : The of Pasquan Ryan : TV : have a very bizarre and painful way of welcoming infants into the community. : (garbled) TV : Unfortunately, the death from this ritual is a mortifying 90 percent. : My God. TV : That explains the low population. : Yeah, it does. TV : On the first moon of Autumn, all the Pasquanian mothers wrap their new-borns in traditional hand painted deerskin,... : Deerskin. TV : ...which have been along from generation to generation. : That's nice. TV : The entire Pasquan then forms a circle on the sacred battlefield of Chin-Chara. : ya-yara TV : Each Pasquanian is then passed, hand to hand, around the circle... : Wow. TV : ...four times. Ryan : times. TV : for the sun,... : Hmm. TV : ...once for the moon,... : The moon. TV : ...once for the earth,... : The earth. TV : ...and for the wind. : The wind, too. TV : When the babies arrive back in mother's hands, they are marched, in procession, to the Pasquanian natural hot springs... : What? TV : ...where the purification will be completed. : What are you saying here? TV : As we watch, the mothers their progeny out of the deerskin shells... : No. TV : ...and dunk them the steaming water. Ryan : No! No! Hot water burn baby! Hot burn baby! Father: That's right, Ryan. Hot water baby. : Hot water burn baby! Wife : Ryan! What's going on out Are you okay? Ryan : Hot water baby! Father: Hot water burn definitely burn baby. : Hot water burn baby! Father: right, Ryan. Hot water burn baby! Ryan : Hot water baby! You are a bitch, Ryan! Ryan : Hot burn baby! : Ryan, are you alright? Father: Hot water the baby! Ryan : Hot water baby! : Ryan! Father: What are you gonna do, : Ryan! Ryan : Hot water baby! Bitch! Wife : Ryan! What's on out there? Ryan : Hot burn baby! Whore! Wife : Who are you to? Bitch! Ryan : I'm to the man! Whore! Ryan : Hot burn baby! : Ryan! Father: Bitch! is a whore!