Father: Well Ryan, tomorrow's a big day. Your mom's coming home from the with your new baby sister. : baby sister Father: right, baby sister. Ryan : sister Father: So, uh, I think now is the time for us to go over some safety rules for when you're around your new sister. Ryan : saftey Father: Okay, rule number one: Always wash your hands touching the baby. : wash hands Father: Do you why? : no Father: Well, because sometimes you have germs on your hands and germs are bad for the baby cause they can make the sick. Ryan : germs make sick That's right, that's right, Ryan. Germs make baby sick. Ryan : germs make the baby Father: Okay, number two. Ryan : more Don't feed the baby anything. Ryan : don't the baby. Father: right. : why? Father: Well, the baby needs to eat special baby food. Ryan : Oh...well, other food is bad for the baby. Ryan : other bad for the baby That's right, good. Now, rule number three. Ryan : rules Father: Never take hot water near the baby because hot water burn the baby. Ryan : bad for the baby Father: Well, not all water, hot water, : yes Father: Cause hot water will the baby. Ryan : i don't understand, Father: Okay, see glass of water that I'm drinking? : yes Father: Well, this is okay for the baby. : yes Father: Here, the glass. : yes Father: See, nice and cool. : yes Father: Now if this was hot water that would be bad because hot water can the baby. Ryan : hot burn baby? Father: Yes, hot water baby. Ryan : hot burn baby Father: Yes, yes, hot burn baby. Ryan : hot water your baby Yes. Ryan : baby go in swimming pool? Father: Oh no, the pool is okay. Swimming pool water is cool. : yes Father: alright. : yes Father: But the jacuzzi is bad because that water is hot and hot will burn the baby. Ryan : hot burn the baby Yes. Ryan : hot burn the baby Father: Yes. Now say you made a cup of tea, would you take near the baby? Ryan : yea, baby tea Father: No Ryan, uh, I think you get it yet. : baby no like tea? Father: Well, I'm the baby will like tea, but what do you make tea with? : ...hot water Father: Right, and what did we say hot water? : ...oh, hot water burn baby Father: Yes, hot water baby! : hot water burn baby! Father: That's right so no tea the baby. : hot water burn baby Yes. Ryan : baby no bath? Father: No, bath water is warm. is okay. : yes Hot is bad. Ryan : yes...hot water burn Father: Yes, hot water baby. Ryan : hot burn baby Father: I think you're it! Ryan : hot burn baby Father: right, Ryan. : hot water burn baby Father: NOW DON'T YOU FORGET THAT! Narrator: 30 later! Wife : Hey, Ryan, are you doing out there? Ryan : Just watchin' the channel. Wife : Well, dinner's gonna be in about five minutes. Ryan : Aw, great baby, aight, be in in a few momentos. Lemme just wind down...(garbled) : Okay, honey! : Yeah. TV : The villagers of : Pasquan TV : have a very bizarre and painful way of their infants into the community. : (garbled) TV : Unfortunately, the death rate from ritual is a mortifying 90 percent. : My God. TV : That the Pasquan's low population. : Yeah, it does. TV : On the first full moon of Autumn, all the Pasquanian wrap their new-borns in traditional hand painted deerskin,... : Deerskin. TV : ...which have been passed from generation to generation. : That's nice. TV : The entire population then forms a circle on the sacred battlefield of Chin-Chara. : ya-yara TV : Each Pasquanian baby is then passed, to hand, around the circle... : Wow. TV : ...four times. Ryan : times. TV : for the sun,... : Hmm. TV : ...once for the moon,... : The moon. TV : ...once for the earth,... : The earth. TV : ...and for the wind. : The wind, too. TV : When the babies arrive back in mother's hands, they are marched, in procession, to the Pasquanian natural hot springs... : What? TV : ...where the purification will be completed. Ryan : What are you saying TV : As we watch, the mothers take their progeny out of the shells... : No. TV : ...and them into the steaming water. Ryan : No! No! Hot water burn baby! Hot water baby! Father: That's right, Ryan. Hot burn baby. Ryan : Hot burn baby! Wife : Ryan! going on out there? Are you okay? Ryan : Hot water baby! Father: Hot water burn most burn baby. Ryan : Hot burn baby! Father: right, Ryan. Hot water burn baby! Ryan : Hot burn baby! You are a bitch, Ryan! Ryan : Hot water baby! : Ryan, are you alright? Father: Hot burn the baby! Ryan : Hot water baby! : Ryan! Father: are you gonna do, whore? : Ryan! Ryan : Hot burn baby! Bitch! Wife : Ryan! What's on out there? Ryan : Hot burn baby! Whore! Wife : Who are you to? Bitch! Ryan : I'm to the man! Whore! Ryan : Hot water baby! : Ryan! Father: Bitch! is a whore!