Father: Ryan, tomorrow's a big day. Your mom's coming home from the hospital with your new baby sister. Ryan : baby Father: right, baby sister. : baby sister Father: So, uh, I think now is the time for us to go over some safety rules for when you're around your new sister. : saftey rules Father: Okay, rule number one: Always wash your hands before the baby. : wash hands Father: Do you why? : no Father: Well, because sometimes you have germs on hands and germs are bad for the baby cause they can make the baby sick. : germs make baby sick Father: That's right, that's right, Ryan. Germs make sick. Ryan : germs make the sick Father: Okay, number two. Ryan : more Father: Don't feed the anything. : don't feed the baby. Father: right. : why? Father: Well, the baby needs to eat special baby food. Ryan : Father: Oh...well, food is bad for the baby. Ryan : other food bad for the That's right, good. Now, rule number three. Ryan : rules Father: Never take hot water the baby because hot water will burn the baby. : water bad for the baby Father: Well, not all water, hot water, : yes Father: hot water will burn the baby. Ryan : i understand, daddy Father: Okay, see this glass of that I'm drinking? : yes Father: Well, this water is for the baby. : yes Father: Here, the glass. : yes Father: See, nice and cool. : yes Father: Now if this was hot water that would be bad because hot water can the baby. Ryan : hot burn baby? Father: Yes, hot water baby. Ryan : hot burn baby Yes, yes, hot water burn baby. Ryan : hot water your baby Yes. Ryan : baby can't go in swimming Oh no, the swimming pool is okay. Swimming pool water is cool. : yes Father: alright. : yes Father: But the jacuzzi is bad because water is hot and hot water will burn the baby. : hot water burn the baby Yes. Ryan : hot water burn the Father: Yes. Now say you made a cup of tea, would you take near the baby? : yea, baby like tea Father: No Ryan, uh, I don't you get it yet. Ryan : baby no tea? Father: Well, I'm sure the baby will like tea, but do you make tea with? : ...hot water Father: Right, and what did we say about hot Ryan : ...oh, hot burn baby Yes, hot water burn baby! Ryan : hot water baby! Father: That's right so no tea the baby. Ryan : hot water baby Yes. Ryan : no take bath? Father: No, bath is warm. Warm is okay. : yes Hot is bad. Ryan : yes...hot water burn Father: Yes, hot water baby. Ryan : hot water burn Father: I you're gettin' it! Ryan : hot water baby That's right, Ryan. Ryan : hot burn baby NOW DON'T YOU EVER FORGET THAT! Narrator: 30 later! Wife : Hey, Ryan, are you doing out there? Ryan : Just the discovery channel. Wife : Well, dinner's be ready in about five minutes. : Aw, great baby, aight, I'll be in in a few momentos. Lemme just wind down...(garbled) : Okay, honey! : Yeah. TV : The of Pasquan : Pasquan TV : have a bizarre and painful way of welcoming their infants into the community. : (garbled) TV : Unfortunately, the death rate from this ritual is a 90 percent. : My God. TV : explains the Pasquan's low population. : Yeah, it does. TV : On the first full moon of Autumn, all the Pasquanian mothers wrap their new-borns in hand painted deerskin,... : Deerskin. TV : ...which have been passed along generation to generation. Ryan : nice. TV : The entire population then forms a circle on the sacred battlefield of Chin-Chara. : ya-yara TV : Each Pasquanian baby is passed, hand to hand, around the circle... : Wow. TV : ...four times. Ryan : times. TV : for the sun,... : Hmm. TV : ...once for the moon,... : The moon. TV : ...once for the earth,... : The earth. TV : ...and for the wind. : The wind, too. TV : When the babies arrive back in their hands, they are marched, in procession, to the Pasquanian natural hot springs... Ryan : TV : ...where the purification will be completed. Ryan : What are you here? TV : As we watch, the mothers their progeny out of the deerskin shells... : No. TV : ...and dunk them the steaming water. Ryan : No! No! Hot water baby! Hot water burn baby! Father: That's right, Ryan. Hot water baby. Ryan : Hot burn baby! Wife : Ryan! going on out there? Are you okay? Ryan : Hot burn baby! Father: Hot burn most definitely burn baby. Ryan : Hot burn baby! Father: right, Ryan. Hot water burn baby! Ryan : Hot burn baby! You are a bitch, Ryan! Ryan : Hot burn baby! Wife : Ryan, are you Hot water burn the baby! Ryan : Hot burn baby! : Ryan! Father: What are you do, whore? : Ryan! Ryan : Hot water baby! Bitch! Wife : Ryan! going on out there? Ryan : Hot water baby! Whore! Wife : Who are you to? Bitch! Ryan : I'm to the man! Whore! Ryan : Hot water baby! : Ryan! Father: Bitch! is a whore!