Woman: Thanks for (beeped out) ishow may I help you? Milton: Oh god you answered; let me to the toy department! Woman: OK hold. Yes I've got an emergency! Deborah: This is Deborah, can I help Milton: Oh thank god answered! Is this the toy Yes it is. Milton: I an emergency! I'm calling about Furby! Deborah: I'm sorry, I don't any. Milton: No! I'm not calling I need the Furby; I'm calling I have a defective Furby that's spitting all of violent words at me!
Yes ma'am. I'm a sir!!! Deborah: sir. My name is Milton; I bought little Furby for my 14 year old boy Chauncey, 493 pounds, and I that I would get him a Furby if he dropped 25 pounds. He's down 520 you know! Yes ma...yes sir.
Milton: to this Furby! I'm gonna put the phone to the Furby right now! It's all kinds of demonic noises and its making all kinds of and gestures at me! Furby: here you little brat, I'LL KILL YOU! He-he-he! Milton: Did you that? Yes, yes sir. Milton: It said it was gonna kill me! Did you hold on it's talking again! Oh-h, eat me! Milton: Now it's using profanity! Did you that! Yes sir. Milton: Where is coming from; I think we're looking at a lawsuit here! Where are you calling from? Milton: I'm my house right now. Furby: I'm going to kill your mommy an ax! DID YOU JUST HEAR THAT!? Deborah: Yes sir, can you on a minute please? Milton: It said it was going to kill my mommy an ax! What kind of are you people' selling over there! Deborah: are you from sir? Milton: Oh! It's again! Shut the hell up jackass! Milton: TO THAT! How can I smoke crack! Oh-h-h! Milton: It just it smokes crack! Sir, can I let you talk to my manager please. Milton: Little Furby is promoting drug use! Yes, put manager on the phone immediately because I'm calling a lawyer next! OK, hold on please. Yes! Manager: Hello how may I help you Milton: Yes is the manager? Manager: Yes it is; how can I you. Is this a decision making manager or a patsy for the higher-ups! Manager: Sir, how can I you, I'll try my best. Milton: I have a defective Furby I purchased from you guys, it's spitting out all kinds of vulgar and demonic phrases, and I'm about to call a lawyer to sue your ass off! What did you say the Furby was doing, and where did you buy it? Milton: I bought it your store here... (making Exorcist noises) Milton: Now its making the Exorcist noises! Hang on. on; let me...let me shake it a bit to see if I can get it to talk. You're a little whore. He-he-he! Milton: did you that! Manager: Sir, are you sure a Furby doll? Milton: Yes I am it just me a whore did you hear that!!! Manager: um... Hold, listen... Furby: You smell like a ass! Oh-h-h. Milton: Now its' me a camels ass!!! Manager: What are you people' selling there! Manager: Well, as far as I know we uh, good s... Milton: I'm gonna to turn that into Fludgecow when I get through with you! thing is starting to scare the hell out of me!! DIE! DIE! DIE! He-he-he. Milton: It just me to die, die, die! Where did you say you...
Furby: I spit acid into your eye and blind you!! He-he! Oh my god! Milton: Now it's threatening to spit into my eyes and blind me! I heard! Milton: I thinkshould I call the Manager: II know what to do! Milton: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! A MANAGER! I THINK IM GOING TO CALL THE BOMB UNIT, AND HAVE THEM TAKE THIS DAMN THING AWAY!!! Furby: Oh-h... I'm to give you diarrhea! Milton: Now it's threatening me with transmitted diseases! He-he Manager: I've never a Furby doll say any of those things! Milton: Oh right! What the is goingis this some kind of joke! No! I Milton: If this is your idea of a joke, I'm going to sue ass off personally too!! You're going to be living in a street pushing a cart in about 3 weeks! Sir I understand that... Furby: I a gun! I'm going to shoot you now! He-he-he-he-he-he-he! Milton: Now it's threatening to shoot me a gun! Sir, I hear these things, but I just... Milton: GOT A GUN! IT'S GOT A GUN! (Gun sounds, Milton screaming and laughing) Sirsir? Oh my god! Ioh (dial tone)