Luyện nghe bài hát English is Cuh-ray-zee

English is the most widely language in the history of the planet.
One out of every seven human can speak or read it.
Half the world's books, 3/4 of the mail are in English.
It has the vocabulary, perhaps two million words,
And a body of literature. But face it:
is cuh-ray-zee!

Just a few examples: There's no egg in eggplant, no or apple in pineapple.
Quicksand works slowly; rings are square.
A writes, but do fingers fing?
Hammers don't ham, don't groce. Haberdashers don't haberdash.
is cuh-ray-zee!

If the plural of tooth is teeth, the plural of booth be beeth?
It's one goose, two geese. Why not one moose, two
If one index, two indices; why not one Kleenex, two Kleenices?
is cuh-ray-zee!

You can comb through the annals of history, but not one annal.
You can make amends, but not one amend.
If you a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one, is it an odd or an end?
If the taught, why isn't it true that a preacher praught?
If you wrote a letter, did you bote your tongue?
And if a vegetarian eats vegetables, what a humanitarian eat?
is cuh-ray-zee!

Why is it that night falls but never and day breaks but never falls?
In what other language do drive on the parkway and park on the driveway?
Ship by truck but send cargo by Recite at a play but play at a recital?
Have noses that run and feet that
is cuh-ray-zee!

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the
When a wise man and a wise guy are different?
To overlook something and to something are very different,
But quite a lot and a few are the same.
How can the weather be hot as hell one day and as hell the next?
is cuh-ray-zee!

You have to marvel at the lunacy of a language in which your house can down
While it is up. You fill out a form by filling it in.
In your alarm clock goes off by going on.
If pro is the opposite of con, what is the of progress?

Well, was invented by people, not computers
And reflects the of the human race.
So why when the stars are out, they're visible,
But when the lights are out, invisible.
When I wind up my watch I start it, but I wind up this rap,
I end it. is cuh-ray-zee!