Luyện nghe bài hát Drunk on the striped table

in my featherless, sagging, wings,
i

my Phoenician, waterlogged, and forty foot wings
in the air
i am drunk against the striped table
pushing these banners into the airless
waving flags as i murmur the recipes of prayers to the vendors
and the pharisees in pumping iron against the sun

the recipes of semitic vendors, egyptian
shaking their backs the sun
with the sounds of sheets of metal
splashing the naked
with wild and the soft fragrance
of
and

i on the beach looking for a place to sleep
My arms are hidden beneath my sailing
i am and fucked up and i fall in the sand
and in the warm cradle of a billion rocks

i dreamed of
she to us in babylon
and she was rattling
her true
and she was dressed in syrian rags
her face had powder on it and there were
little brown moons her eyes
and i saw her
an women parading around naked
powerful, but still after all
doing it the old way
with clothes and force

now i in the afternoon
the arcade is with children
are walking by staring at me
pre-pubescent faces are coming a little too
i even remember if i have on any underwear

i get up and away
i never even this stuff was here
the music, the games, the money
this commune living
these black suck
these harmonica
all go back to the north
canada, new jersey, where they do that

II.

I abandon the old way when i first got to san diego. I fucked anybody i wanted to. I was, however, gang raped by a blues in an old school bus. That was pretty
horrible. were only three of them. I can't remember if i got the third on e off me. I think i did. I was so ashamed.

Perhaps people think if you don't scream you're not being raped. Perhaps they think if you say to yourself, just let him do it and he won't hurt you. Or even
provocative, just let him do it and maybe he'll like you. And of course you've saying no, no, don't . Or pushing but not pushing too much. Because you're just a little
girl really, and afraid, and you're so tired, and you just want someplace to sleep.

That's what it's when you run away from home.
Lots of people rape you. And you'll let them. Just to have a place to sleep.
The thing was, after they fucked me, and all this juice all over my thighs, didn't even let me sleep there.
You think this only happens to me? crazy. You think this only happens to girls who are rough? You're wrong. You think this only happens in stories?
Look you.

Still i liked the of being assertive. I liked the idea of free love in san diego. i liked the idea of saying i want you instead of waiting around so some guy can get his rocks
off thinking you didn't really want him that he won something from you that you want to give him. This strategy, this tradition, is a kind of rape.

This idea that men are suppose to win you, that you are suppose to be aloof, is a but significant dramatization of rape. I do not like it. not one bit. that sam i am that
sam i am. i do not that sam i am.

now i could no more say get here and eat this sweet me than i could
swallow a bull
or write names on the in blood
or wear the victims on my head
or row a boat across the atlantic again

and though sometimes i am at the desk, or
at a eating dinner
and there is one, some slave, or some anything

eating mine
and no one
or every ones
and everyone is
i could never anything to reality now
reality is cracked by the blows of
men and nights with pointed
snapping at the air
i
and all things now
take place my many layered

my
my
are

did you go
when things bad, anyway?
i sat beside you in bathroom all night.
you were
you were talking to me like a
you gone, man, gone
you just kept in the bath
and getting out and letting the run out
and getting in again
and all that food i
it was all the walls in the kitchen
and there was a wave
and the waves very, very high
and the dogs turning into carrots
and the valentines melting beneath
and neon
where shattered places the road
the road through echo park
that still
naked body
the bed you
stupid lamps
your echoes
the last
of me you
you me.
you loved me

where did you go?i knew you like that scene of girls chasing you the street. that's why you always liked to have a very hip car, because it was important that they
chase you in the right car, and i was not about to you.

i that story of that italian girl in philadelphia chasing you down the night street you were in a taxi cab, that's a nice image. then the japanese girl. but then my feet
were starting toward you and you were turning the corner onto sunset and you left me there in a day cold turkey. and all i can think of i philadelphia cheese steak
sandwich philadelphia sandwich.

philadelphia cheese steak and every time i think cheese steak i see all wet cheese and steak.
Here comes the parade! Look! it comes!
I let you go.
I let you go. You to rip girls. I had to let you go.