Luyện nghe bài hát Drunk on the striped table

in my featherless, sagging, wings,
i

my Phoenician, waterlogged, and forty foot wings
in the air
i am laying against the striped table
pushing these into the airless beach
these flags as i murmur the recipes of prayers to the vendors
and the pharisees in bikinis iron against the sun

the recipes of vendors, egyptian vendors
shaking their against the sun
laughing with the sounds of sheets of
the naked pharisees
with wild bikinis and the fragrance
of
and

i walk on the beach looking for a to sleep
My arms are beneath my sailing skin
i am broke and fucked up and i fall in the
and in the warm cradle of a billion rocks

i of cher
she to us in babylon
and she was rattling
her true
and she was dressed in high syrian
her face had white powder on it and were
brown moons beneath her eyes
and i saw her
an arabic women parading around
powerful, but still after all
doing it the old way
with sparkling and force

now i awake in the
the is filled with children
are walking by staring at me
pre-pubescent faces are coming a too close
i even remember if i have on any underwear

i get up and walk
i never even this stuff was here
the music, the games, the money
this living sucks
black panthers suck
these harmonica
should all go to the north
canada, new jersey, ever they do that

II.

I abandon the old way when i got to san diego. I fucked anybody i wanted to. I was, however, gang raped by a blues band in an old school bus. That was pretty
horrible. There were only of them. I can't remember if i got the third on e off me. I think i did. I was so ashamed.

Perhaps people think if you don't scream you're not raped. Perhaps they think if you say to yourself, just let him do it and he won't hurt you. Or even more
provocative, just let him do it and maybe he'll like you. And of course you've been no, no, don't . Or pushing but not pushing too much. Because you're just a little
girl really, and you're afraid, and you're so tired, and you just want to sleep.

That's it's like when you run away from home.
of people will rape you. And you'll let them. Just to have a place to sleep.
The thing was, after they fucked me, and all this juice all over my thighs, they even let me sleep there.
You think this only happens to me? You're crazy. You think this only happens to girls who are rough? wrong. You think this only happens in stories?
behind you.

Still i liked the idea of being assertive. I liked the idea of free love in san diego. i liked the idea of saying i want you instead of waiting around so some guy can get his
off you didn't really want him that he won something from you that you didn't want to give him. This strategy, this tradition, is a kind of rape.

This idea that men are suppose to win you, that you are suppose to be aloof, is a small but significant dramatization of rape. I do not it. not one bit. that sam i am that
sam i am. i do not like sam i am.

now i could no more say get down here and eat sweet me than i could
swallow a bull
or write names on the walls in
or wear the horns on my head
or row a boat across the atlantic ocean

and though i am sitting at the desk, or
at a eating dinner
and there is some one, slave, or some anything

eating alone
and no one
or eating every
and everyone is
i could bring anything to reality now
is cracked by the blows of terrible
men and nights with teeth
poison at the air
i
and all good now
take place inside my layered

my
my
are

did you go
when went bad, anyway?
i sat beside you in that all night.
you crying
you were talking to me a baby
you gone, man, gone
you just getting in the bath
and out and letting the water run out
and then getting in
and all food i made
it was all the walls in the kitchen
and was a heat wave
and the waves were very, high
and the dogs were turning carrots
and the valentines were beneath
and neon
where shattered pave the road
the winding through echo park
that still
your body
the bed you
those lamps
your body
the last
of me you
you me.
you me madly

where did you go?i knew you like scene of girls chasing you down the street. that's why you always liked to have a very hip car, because it was important that they
you in the right car, and i was not about to chase you.

i knew that story of that italian girl in philadelphia chasing you the night street you were in a taxi cab, that's a nice image. then the japanese girl. but then my feet
were starting toward you and you were the corner onto sunset and you left me there in a second day cold turkey. and all i can think of i philadelphia cheese steak
sandwich philadelphia sandwich.

philadelphia cheese steak and every i think cheese steak i see all this wet cheese and steak.
Here the parade! Look! Here it comes!
I let you go.
I let you go. You to rip girls. I had to let you go.