Luyện nghe bài hát Drunk on the striped table

in my featherless, sagging, wings,
i

my Phoenician, waterlogged, orchestrated and foot wings
in the air
i am drunk laying against the table
these banners into the airless beach
waving these as i murmur the recipes of prayers to the vendors
and the pharisees in bikinis pumping against the sun

the recipes of semitic vendors, egyptian
their backs against the sun
laughing with the sounds of of metal
splashing the naked
with wild and the soft fragrance
of
and

i walk on the beach looking for a to sleep
My arms are hidden beneath my sailing
i am broke and fucked up and i in the sand
and sleeping in the warm cradle of a rocks

i of cher
she came to us in
and she was rattling
her language
and she was in high syrian rags
her face had white on it and there were
brown moons beneath her eyes
and i saw her
an arabic women parading around
powerful, irreverent but after all
doing it the old way
with clothes and force

now i in the afternoon
the arcade is with children
families are walking by at me
pre-pubescent are coming a little too close
i don't even if i have on any underwear

i get up and walk
i never even knew stuff was here
the twirling music, the games, the
commune living sucks
these black panthers
these players
should all go to the north
canada, new jersey, where ever do that

II.

I abandon the old way when i first got to san diego. I fucked anybody i wanted to. I was, however, gang raped by a band in an old school bus. That was pretty
horrible. There only three of them. I can't remember if i got the third on e off me. I think i did. I was so ashamed.

Perhaps people think if you don't scream you're not raped. Perhaps they think if you say to yourself, just let him do it and he won't hurt you. Or even more
provocative, just let him do it and maybe he'll like you. And of you've been saying no, no, don't . Or pushing but not pushing too much. Because you're just a little
girl really, and you're afraid, and you're so tired, and you just someplace to sleep.

what it's like when you run away from home.
Lots of will rape you. And you'll let them. Just to have a place to sleep.
The thing was, after they fucked me, and all this juice all over my thighs, didn't even let me sleep there.
You think this only happens to me? You're crazy. You think only happens to girls who are rough? You're wrong. You think this only happens in stories?
behind you.

Still i liked the idea of being assertive. I liked the idea of love in san diego. i liked the idea of saying i want you instead of waiting around so some guy can get his rocks
off thinking you didn't really want him that he won something you that you didn't want to give him. This strategy, this tradition, is a kind of rape.

This idea that men are suppose to win you, that you are suppose to be aloof, is a small but significant dramatization of rape. I do not like it. not one bit. sam i am that
sam i am. i do not like sam i am.

now i could no more say get down here and eat this sweet me i could
a bull fighter
or names on the walls in blood
or wear the horns on my head
or row a boat the atlantic ocean again

and though sometimes i am at the desk, or
at a eating dinner
and there is one, some slave, or some anything

eating mine
and no one
or every ones
and everyone is
i never bring anything to reality now
reality is by the blows of terrible
men and nights pointed teeth
poison at the air
i
and all good now
take place my many layered

my
my
are

did you go
when things went bad,
i sat beside you in that all night.
you were
you were talking to me like a
you gone, man, gone
you just kept getting in the
and out and letting the water run out
and then getting in
and all that i made
it was all over the in the kitchen
and there was a heat
and the waves were very, high
and the dogs turning into carrots
and the valentines melting beneath
and neon
where shattered pave the road
the winding road through echo
echoes still
your body
the bed you
those stupid
your echoes
the shadows
of me you
you me.
you me madly

where did you go?i knew you that scene of girls chasing you down the street. that's why you always liked to have a very hip car, because it was important that they
chase you in the car, and i was not about to chase you.

i knew that story of that italian girl in philadelphia chasing you down the night street you were in a taxi cab, that's a image. then the japanese girl. but then my feet
were starting toward you and you were turning the corner onto sunset and you left me there in a second day cold turkey. and all i can think of i philadelphia steak
philadelphia cheesesteak sandwich.

philadelphia cheese steak and every time i think steak i see all this wet cheese and steak.
Here comes the parade! Look! it comes!
I let you go.
I let you go. You to rip girls. I had to let you go.