I'm sick and of my generation getting blamed For the state of the planet, I'm sick of my generation called TV generation', "Well all you guys do is watch TV" What did you We watched lee harvey oswald get shot
Live on tv one morning, we were afraid to change The fucking channel for the next years "This show sucks", "Yeah, but somebody get shot the commercial, now hang on!
That's what's wrong with this country, we always the wrong guys We shoot J F K, we shoot R F K and it to teddy, we go "Ahh, him alone, he'll fuck it up himself, no problem, you know" Biggest target in the whole goddamn Kennedy
Nobody takes a shot on me, he weighs about seven thousand You could a bullet in Los Angeles and hit him in the ass in Boston Five minutes later, he'd be standing on the At the Kennedy going, "Ah There's a bullet in my ass, ah"
Ted kennedy, good senator, but a bad You know I'm saying, folks? One of those guys who gets home At o'clock in the morning and goes, "What did I forget? Oh! The fucking girl! the matter with me? Jesus, are my pants? Holy shit!
Because I'll you folks, we got a real problem with guns In country, we have people snapping Almost twice, three, four, five a year, right? People just snap, they can't take it anymore, just snap
go into Mcdonalds and kill fifteen people I mean what the is going on down at the post office? Every six months some guy fired, comes back And kills all his
If I worked at the post as a supervisor I wouldn't lay anybody off for the next twenty-five fucking I'd just walk going, "Hanrahan, what're you doing?" "Nothing" "Well, keep it up, you're a great job! Jesus, I'll tell ya"
And I am and tired for New York city taking the blame In country for the crime problem, you know Whenever you read a fact chart, it always Detroit leads the world In rape and murder and everything else, but New takes the blame
"New york's a cess pool, it's a pool of filth and crime We're moving", "Hey! I just moved four years ago And I'm not leaving, because this is the most exciting In the to live"
Oh yeah! Yeah! There are so many to die in New York city Come on! Race riots, by shootings, subway crashes Construction cranes on the sidewalks covers blowing up, asbestos shooting into the sky
We had a crash here a couple of years ago Five died, the next day they found the driver was drunk And hooked on crack, folks, this Disneyland Look like a bike ride, doesn't it?
"Your drive today is Edward, he's drunk and on crack The man sitting next to you has a loaded luck, folks!", "Honey, get the camera!" This is be fucking great!"
Yeah, I love in New York, man and people who live in New York We wear fact like a badge right on our sleeve because we know That impresses everybody! "I was in vietnam" "So I live in New York!", "Really?
Yeah, New York teaches you to live life the way It be lived, moment to moment, yes Because every moment in New York be your last Oh yeah,
You could be walking down the street Feeling good about yourself, drink free, drug Looking to the future And somebody accidently nudges their poodle off of a 75th ledge
Doink! And he's for the ground At a and seventy five thousand miles per hour And curchunk he's impeded in your head! dead on contact The headline in the post the day reads, "Man killed by best friend"
People cut the article out and they laugh it at the office And you're forever as the poodle man! "I the poodle man and he hated fucking poodles"
New york you to live life moment to moment And by street and beat to beat we've all played that street ot street game in New York Haven't we? Yes we have, good block, bad block, good block, bad Gun block, crack block, asbestos block, poodle block! Poodle
'Cause most people think, "Life sucks, and you die" I disagree, I think sucks, then you get cancer Then you go into and you lose all your hair You feel bad yourself, then all of the sudden The cancer goes remission
You look good, you feel good, you're going And all of the sudden you have a stroke, you can't move your side And one day you step off the curb at 68th by center and bang You get hit by a bus and then, maybe, you die
Because I Jim Hensen said it best when he said "Anybody got any aspirin? I I got a cold" And a chill filled the room, we all have this incredible To the muppets, don't we? "We love the muppets! so cute!"
Did you hear about Jim Hensen's Here in New York city, huh? Kermit the frog and big bird sang "It's not being green" At Jim Hensen's funeral, if I'm fifty-six old When I kick the bucket and a fucking sock is at my funeral
I'm gonna pop out of the and go "Hey! What the Hell is this Sammy Davis Jr. gets Frank Sinatra And I get a sock? I'm really off now!