Davey's Song

He dine and dash me! He chew and screw me!
He sip and skip me!

What?

He no pay for his four scorpion bowl

Oh, boy

I'm the kinda guy that can't stand the holiday
So I drink them all away
That's me

I don't decorate no trees
And I won't eat no potato lakees
But I'll give this old ladies melons a squeeze
That's just who I am

Well, I'll never spin a dreidel
But I'll always throw an egg
And I'll Charlie horse your leg for laughs

While you're singing your holiday tune
I'm acting like the town Bafoon
Whipping out my big white scary moon
And blowing a beef your way

I hate folks who think reindeer are cute
To me they're just something to shoot
I hate love, I hate you, I hate me

Well I'm a snowmobile stealing
No 'tis the season' feeling
Kind of guy
(Kind of guy)

This time of year sucks
So I take my numchucks
And make sure every snowman dies

Believing in Santa's all wrong
And Chanukah's eight days too long
I hate love, I hate you, I hate me
I hate love, I hate you, I hate me