One day four or five years ago We is at the Conoco station tires, and swattin' flies And discussin' the of the Union
right out in front of the Baptist church Come a big old school bus Had signs upon it And thirty-five and dogs inside
About half of 'em went for the courthouse And them dogs on the fireplug Rest of 'em set starin' at us And I says, "Roy, go get your gun"
He says, "Which is the hippies?" And is the dogs?" I says, "Beats the out of me, Roy" What they was, was a bunch a' crispy critters And their was a space cadet
He says, "Sagittarius, we has to disembark, men Get the incense goin' and the out We gonna camp in the park, man"
I says, "Boys, let me explain the to ya A, gettin' me down And B, we got us a law here And C, you in the town"
"You drop one string a' beads in that there And you gonna see a whole lot of You got fifteen to get out of town, boys Or we gonna ya to Mars"
Well, all got back in the purple bus And proceeded to the city Then the telephone rang, was the pool Says a a' wild critters was in it
So we all got in the Plymouth Which is at the Conoco station flashin' on down to the swimmin' pool To them critters a citation
By the time we arrived, it was too damn Them critters is all had their pants Them dogs was the bathhouse apart And after the fish in the fish pond
I says, "Roy, you get the one in the T-shirt And I'll get the with a net" We gonna have a jail full of naked crispy And a drip-dry cadet"
Well, we 'em hell, but we lost the war 'Cause critters outnumbered us So they moved in and set up And they lived in purple school bus
Six later, there was nothin' in town But dogs and a head shop Sellin' dried up weeds, and seeds And postcards
Yeah, critters took the City Council And the all barked their brains out And the whole damn town was critters And the mayor was a space