Luyện nghe bài hát Alice's Restaurant Massacre

You can get you want at Alice's Restaurant
You can get you want at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in it's the back
Just a a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's

Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, was on - two ago on
Thanksgiving, when my and I went up to visit Alice at the
restaurant, but Alice live in the restaurant, she lives in the
nearby the restaurant, in the bell-tower, with her husband Ray and
Fasha the dog. And livin' in the bell tower like that, got a lot of
downstairs where the pews used to be in. Havin' all that room,
seein' as how they took out all the pews, decided that they didn't
have to take out garbage for a long time.

We got up there, we all the garbage in there, and we decided it'd be
a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage down to the dump. So
we took the a ton of garbage, put it in the back of a red VW
microbus, took shovels and rakes and implements of and headed
on the city dump.

Well we got and there was a big sign and a chain across across the
dump saying, "Closed on Thanksgiving." And we had heard of a dump
on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our eyes we drove off
into the sunset looking for another to put the garbage.

We didn't find one. we came to a side road, and off the side of the
side there was another fifteen foot cliff and at the bottom of the
cliff there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big
is better than two little piles, and rather than bring one up we
decided to throw down.

That's what we did, and back to the church, had a thanksgiving
dinner couldn't be beat, went to sleep and didn't get up until the
next morning, when we got a phone call from Obie. He said, "Kid,
we your name on an envelope at the bottom of a half a ton of
garbage, and just wanted to if you had any information about it." And
I said, "Yes, sir, Officer Obie, I tell a lie, I put that envelope
under garbage."

After speaking to Obie for about fourty-five minutes on the we
finally arrived at the of the matter and said that we had to go down
and pick up the garbage, and also had to go down and to him at the
police officer's station. So we got in the red VW with the
shovels and rakes and implements of and headed on toward the
officer's station.

Now friends, there was only one or two things Obie coulda done at
the police station, and the first was he could have given us a for
so brave and honest on the telephone, which wasn't very likely, and
we didn't it, and the other thing was he could have bawled us out
and told us never to be see driving garbage the vicinity again,
is what we expected, but when we got to the police officer's station
there was a third possibility that we hadn't counted upon, and we was
both immediately arrested. Handcuffed. And I said "Obie, I think I
can pick up the garbage with handcuffs on." He said, "Shut up, kid.
Get in the of the patrol car."

And that's we did, sat in the back of the patrol car and drove to the
Scene of the Crime unquote. I want tell you about the town of
Stockbridge, Massachusets, where this happened here, they got stop
signs, two police officers, and one police car, but we got to the
Scene of the Crime there was five police officers and three cars,
being the biggest of the last fifty years, and everybody wanted to
get in the newspaper story about it. And they was up all kinds of
cop equipment that they had around the police officer's station.
They was taking plaster tracks, foot prints, dog smelling prints, and
they took twenty seven colour glossy photographs with circles
and arrows and a on the back of each one explaining what each
one was to be used as evidence us. Took pictures of the approach,
the getaway, the northwest corner the corner and that's not to
mention the photography.

After the ordeal, we went back to the jail. Obie he was going to put
us in the cell. Said, "Kid, I'm going to put you in the cell, I your
wallet and your belt." And I said, "Obie, I can you wanting my
wallet so I don't have any to spend in the cell, but what do you
my belt for?" And he said, "Kid, we don't want any hangings." I
said, "Obie, did you I was going to hang myself for littering?"
Obie said he was sure, and friends Obie was, cause he took out the
toilet seat so I couldn't hit myself over the and drown, and he took
out the toilet paper so I couldn't bend the bars out the - roll the
toilet paper out the window, down the roll and have an escape. Obie
was making sure, and it was four or five hours later that Alice
(remember Alice? It's a song about Alice), Alice came by and a few
nasty to Obie on the side, bailed us out of jail, and we went back
to the church, had a another dinner that couldn't be beat,
and didn't get up until the morning, when we all had to go to court.

We walked in, sat down, Obie came in with the twenty seven
colour glossy pictures with circles and and a paragraph on the back
of one, sat down. Man came in said, "All rise." We all stood up,
and Obie stood up the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy
pictures, and the judge walked in sat down with a eye dog, and he
sat down, we sat down. Obie looked at the eye dog, and then at the
twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy with circles and arrows
and a paragraph on the of each one, and looked at the seeing eye dog.
And then at twenty seven eight-by-ten glossy pictures with circles
and arrows and a paragraph on the of each one and began to cry,
'cause Obie came to the realization that it was a case of American
justice, and there wasn't nothing he could do about it, and the
judge wasn't to look at the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy
pictures the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each
one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence us. And
we was fined $50 and had to up the garbage in the snow, but thats not
what I to tell you about.

Came to about the draft.

They got a building New York City, it's called Whitehall Street,
you walk in, you get injected, inspected, detected, infected,
neglected and selected. I went down to get my examination one
day, and I in, I sat down, got good and drunk the night before, so
I looked and my best when I went in that morning. `Cause I wanted to
like the all-American kid from New York City, man I wanted, I wanted
to like the all-, I wanted to be the all American kid from New York,
and I in, sat down, I was hung down, brung down, hung up, and all
kinds o' mean nasty ugly things. And I waked in and sat down and they
me a piece of paper, said, "Kid, see the phsychiatrist, 604."

And I went up there, I said, "Shrink, I to kill. I mean, I wanna, I
wanna kill. Kill. I wanna, I wanna see, I wanna see blood and and
guts and veins in my teeth. Eat burnt bodies. I mean kill, Kill,
KILL, KILL." And I started jumpin up and yelling, "KILL, KILL," and
he started jumpin up and down with me and we was both up and down
yelling, "KILL, KILL." And the sargent came over, pinned a on me,
me down the hall, said, "You're our boy."

Didn't too good about it.

Proceeded on down the hall gettin injections, inspections,
detections, neglections and all kinds of stuff that was doin' to me
at the there, and I was there for two hours, three hours, four
hours, I was there for a long time going through all kinds of mean
ugly things and I was just having a tough there, and they was
inspecting, injecting every single of me, and they was leaving no
untouched. Proceeded through, and when I finally came to the see the
last man, I walked in, walked in sat down after a whole big there,
and I walked up and said, "What do you want?" He said, "Kid, we got
one question. you ever been arrested?"

And I to tell him the story of the Alice's Restaurant Massacre,
with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff that and all
the phenome... - and he stopped me there and said, "Kid, did you ever
go to court?"

And I proceeded to tell him the story of the seven eight-by-ten
colour pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on
the back of each one, and he stopped me there and said, "Kid, I want
you to go and sit down on that bench says Group W .... NOW kid!!"

And I, I over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
where put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty
looking people on the there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the next to me! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and crime-type guys sitting on the
bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, one, the meanest
father of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' and all kind of things and he sat down next to me
and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all away from me on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean things, till I
said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of things that we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, it
up and said.

"Kids,


officer's-name-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say", and for
forty-five minutes and nobody understood a that he said, but we had
fun filling out the and playing with the pencils on the bench there,
and I filled out the with the four part harmony, and wrote it
down there, just it was, and everything was fine and I put down the
pencil, and I turned the piece of paper, and there, there on the
other side, in the of the other side, away from everything else on
the other side, in parentheses, capital letters, quotated, the
words:

("KID, YOU REHABILITATED YOURSELF?")

I went over to the sargent, said, "Sargeant, you got a lot a gall to
ask me if I've myself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm
sittin' here on the bench, I mean I'm sittin on the Group W bench
'cause you to know if I'm moral enough join the army, burn women,
kids, and villages after bein' a litterbug." He looked at me and
said, "Kid, we don't like kind, and we're gonna send you fingerprints
off to Washington."

And friends, in Washington enshrined in some little folder, is a
study in black and of my fingerprints. And the only reason I'm
you this song now is cause you may know somebody in a similar
situation, or you may be in a situation, and if your in a
situation like that only one thing you can do and that's walk into
the shrink wherever you are ,just in say "Shrink, You can get
anything you want, at Alice's restaurant.". And out. You know, if
one person, just one does it they may think he's really sick and
they won't take him. And if two people, two do it, in harmony,
they may think they're both faggots and won't take either of them.
And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people in
singin a bar of Restaurant and walking out. They may think it's an
organization. And can you, can you imagine people a day,I said
fifty people a day walking in singin a bar of Alice's and
walking out. And friends may thinks it's a movement.

And that's what it is , the Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and
all you got to do to join is sing it the next time it around on the
guitar.

With feeling. So wait for it to come around on the guitar, here and
sing it it does. Here it comes.

You can get anything you want, at Alice's
You can get you want, at Alice's Restaurant
right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at Alice's

That was horrible. If you to end war and stuff you got to sing loud.
I've been singing this now for twenty five minutes. I could sing it
for another five minutes. I'm not proud... or tired.

So we'll wait it comes around again, and this time with four part
and feeling.

We're just waitin' for it to come around is we're doing.

All now.

You can get you want, at Alice's Restaurant
Alice
You can get anything you want, at Alice's
Walk right in it's the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad
You can get anything you want, at Restaurant

Da da da da da da da dum
At Restaurant