Luyện nghe bài hát Alice's Restaurant Massacre

You can get anything you want at Alice's
You can get you want at Alice's Restaurant
right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile the railroad track
You can get anything you at Alice's Restaurant

Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, was on - two ago on
Thanksgiving, when my friend and I went up to Alice at the
restaurant, but Alice doesn't in the restaurant, she lives in the
church the restaurant, in the bell-tower, with her husband Ray and
Fasha the dog. And livin' in the bell tower like that, got a lot of
room downstairs the pews used to be in. Havin' all that room,
seein' as how they took out all the pews, they that they didn't
to take out their garbage for a long time.

We got up there, we found all the in there, and we decided it'd be
a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage to the city dump. So
we took the a ton of garbage, put it in the back of a red VW
microbus, took shovels and rakes and implements of and headed
on toward the dump.

we got there and there was a big sign and a chain across across the
dump saying, "Closed on Thanksgiving." And we had never heard of a
closed on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our we drove off
into the looking for another place to put the garbage.

We didn't find one. Until we came to a road, and off the side of the
side road there was another fifteen cliff and at the bottom of the
there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile
is better than two piles, and rather than bring that one up we
decided to our's down.

That's we did, and drove back to the church, had a thanksgiving
dinner that be beat, went to sleep and didn't get up until the
next morning, when we got a phone call officer Obie. He said, "Kid,
we found your name on an envelope at the bottom of a a ton of
garbage, and just wanted to know if you had any information it." And
I said, "Yes, sir, Officer Obie, I tell a lie, I put that envelope
under garbage."

speaking to Obie for about fourty-five minutes on the telephone we
finally at the truth of the matter and said that we had to go down
and pick up the garbage, and also had to go down and to him at the
police officer's station. So we got in the red VW with the
shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on the
police station.

Now friends, was only one or two things that Obie coulda done at
the station, and the first was he could have given us a medal for
being so brave and honest on the telephone, which very likely, and
we didn't expect it, and the other thing was he have bawled us out
and told us to be see driving garbage around the vicinity again,
which is what we expected, but when we got to the police officer's
there was a third that we hadn't even counted upon, and we was
both immediately arrested. Handcuffed. And I "Obie, I don't think I
can pick up the garbage these handcuffs on." He said, "Shut up, kid.
Get in the back of the car."

And what we did, sat in the back of the patrol car and drove to the
quote Scene of the Crime unquote. I want you about the town of
Stockbridge, Massachusets, where this here, they got three stop
signs, two police officers, and one car, but when we got to the
Scene of the Crime there was five police officers and police cars,
being the biggest crime of the last years, and everybody wanted to
get in the newspaper about it. And they was using up all kinds of
cop equipment they had hanging around the police officer's station.
was taking plaster tire tracks, foot prints, dog smelling prints, and
they took twenty seven colour glossy photographs with circles
and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining each
one was to be as evidence against us. Took pictures of the approach,
the getaway, the corner the southwest corner and that's not to
the aerial photography.

After the ordeal, we went back to the jail. said he was going to put
us in the cell. Said, "Kid, I'm going to put you in the cell, I your
wallet and your belt." And I said, "Obie, I can understand you my
wallet so I don't have any money to spend in the cell, but do you
want my belt for?" And he said, "Kid, we want any hangings." I
said, "Obie, did you think I was going to hang for littering?"
Obie said he was making sure, and friends Obie was, cause he out the
toilet seat so I couldn't hit myself over the and drown, and he took
out the toilet so I couldn't bend the bars roll out the - roll the
toilet paper out the window, slide down the roll and have an escape.
was making sure, and it was about four or five hours later Alice
(remember Alice? It's a song Alice), Alice came by and with a few
nasty words to Obie on the side, us out of jail, and we went back
to the church, had a another dinner that couldn't be beat,
and didn't get up until the morning, when we all had to go to court.

We walked in, sat down, came in with the twenty seven eight-by-ten
colour glossy pictures circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back
of one, sat down. Man came in said, "All rise." We all stood up,
and stood up with the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy
pictures, and the judge in sat down with a seeing eye dog, and he
sat down, we sat down. Obie looked at the eye dog, and then at the
twenty seven colour glossy pictures with circles and arrows
and a paragraph on the of each one, and looked at the seeing eye dog.
And then at twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures circles
and arrows and a on the back of each one and began to cry,
'cause Obie to the realization that it was a typical case of American
blind justice, and there wasn't he could do about it, and the
judge wasn't going to look at the twenty seven eight-by-ten glossy
pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of
one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence us. And
we was fined $50 and had to pick up the garbage in the snow, but not
I came to tell you about.

Came to talk the draft.

They got a building down New City, it's called Whitehall Street,
where you in, you get injected, inspected, detected, infected,
and selected. I went down to get my physical examination one
day, and I walked in, I sat down, got and drunk the night before, so
I looked and felt my best when I went in morning. `Cause I wanted to
like the all-American kid from New York City, man I wanted, I wanted
to feel like the all-, I wanted to be the all American kid New York,
and I walked in, sat down, I was down, brung down, hung up, and all
kinds o' mean nasty ugly things. And I waked in and sat down and they
me a piece of paper, said, "Kid, see the phsychiatrist, 604."

And I went up there, I said, "Shrink, I to kill. I mean, I wanna, I
wanna kill. Kill. I wanna, I see, I wanna see blood and gore and
guts and veins in my teeth. Eat dead bodies. I mean kill, Kill,
KILL, KILL." And I started jumpin up and yelling, "KILL, KILL," and
he started jumpin up and down me and we was both jumping up and down
yelling, "KILL, KILL." And the came over, pinned a medal on me,
me down the hall, said, "You're our boy."

Didn't feel too about it.

Proceeded on down the gettin more injections, inspections,
detections, neglections and all kinds of that they was doin' to me
at the thing there, and I was there for two hours, three hours,
hours, I was there for a long going through all kinds of mean nasty
ugly things and I was just a tough time there, and they was
inspecting, injecting every part of me, and they was leaving no
part untouched. Proceeded through, and when I came to the see the
man, I walked in, walked in sat down after a whole big thing there,
and I up and said, "What do you want?" He said, "Kid, we only got
one question. Have you ever arrested?"

And I proceeded to tell him the story of the Alice's Massacre,
with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff that and all
the phenome... - and he me right there and said, "Kid, did you ever
go to court?"

And I to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten
colour pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on
the back of each one, and he stopped me right there and said, "Kid, I
you to go and sit down on that bench that says W .... NOW kid!!"

And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and is, Group W's
where they put you if you may not be moral to join the army after
committing your crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
looking on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the next to me! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type sitting on the
bench to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
father raper of them all, was over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of and he sat down next to me
and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all away from me on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, I
said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of groovy things we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had paper in his hand, held it
up and said.

"Kids,


officer's-name-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say", and for
forty-five minutes and understood a word that he said, but we had
fun filling out the forms and with the pencils on the bench there,
and I filled out the massacre the four part harmony, and wrote it
down there, just like it was, and was fine and I put down the
pencil, and I turned over the piece of paper, and there, on the
other side, in the middle of the other side, away from else on
the other side, in parentheses, capital letters, quotated, the
following

("KID, HAVE YOU YOURSELF?")

I over to the sargent, said, "Sargeant, you got a lot a damn gall to
ask me if rehabilitated myself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm
sittin' here on the bench, I mean I'm sittin here on the W bench
'cause you want to know if I'm moral join the army, burn women,
kids, and villages after bein' a litterbug." He looked at me and
said, "Kid, we don't like your kind, and we're gonna send you
off to Washington."

And friends, somewhere in Washington enshrined in little folder, is a
in black and white of my fingerprints. And the only reason I'm
singing you this song now is cause you may know somebody in a
situation, or you may be in a similar situation, and if in a
situation like that there's one thing you can do and that's walk into
the shrink wherever you are ,just in say "Shrink, You can get
anything you want, at restaurant.". And walk out. You know, if
one person, just one person it they may think he's really sick and
they take him. And if two people, two people do it, in harmony,
they may they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.
And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people in
singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out. They may think an
organization. And can you, can you imagine people a day,I said
people a day walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and
walking out. And friends may thinks it's a movement.

And that's what it is , the Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and
all you got to do to join is sing it the time it come's around on the
guitar.

With feeling. So we'll wait for it to come on the guitar, here and
sing it when it does. it comes.

You can get anything you want, at Restaurant
You can get you want, at Alice's Restaurant
right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad
You can get anything you want, at Restaurant

That was horrible. If you to end war and stuff you got to sing loud.
I've been singing this song now for twenty minutes. I could sing it
for another twenty minutes. I'm not proud... or tired.

So we'll wait till it comes around again, and this time with part
and feeling.

We're just waitin' for it to come is what we're doing.

All now.

You can get anything you want, at Restaurant
Alice
You can get you want, at Alice's Restaurant
right in it's around the back
Just a half a from the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at Alice's

Da da da da da da da dum
At Alice's