Advice From Christmas Past / Government Flu

Why are such a stupid asshole?
Would you really like to know?
Well, pay your fee, remove your clothes, and Yvette will show you how
You went to school where you were taught to fear and to obey
Be cheerful, fit in, or someone might think you're weird

Life can be perfect
People can be trusted
Someday, I will fall in love
A nice quiet home of my very own
Free from all hate
Happy and having fun all the time
It never happened did it?

We got a drug
We're gonna try it out on you
Won't make you die
It'll getcha just a little bit sick

Got a head cold
Got a chest cold
And it's three days old
Goin' on forever

Make you hazy
Make you lazy
Drive you crazy
For days and days and days and days and days and years

Barely got the time now
To stay on the job
Double up the dosage in your water supply
Make you even sicker 'til you're slippin' away

Getting all depressed
It's getting all your friends
You can't get it up
For nothing that'll rock the boat

The government flu
The government flu
The government flu

Slip it abroad
Keep a-slowin' down the USSR
But meanwhile
We'll keep an eye on what it's doin' to you

Got a head cold
Got a chest cold
And it's three days old
Goin' on forever

Make you hazy
Make you lazy
Drive you crazy
For days and days and days and days and days
And days and days and days and days and days
And days and days and days and days and days and years

The government flu
The government flu
The government flu
Flew through you