You're Moving Out Today

(Carole Bayer Sager/Bette Midler/Bruce Roberts)
I stayed out late one night and you moved in
I didn't mind 'cause of the state you were in
May I remind you that it's been a year since then

Today the landlady, she said to me (what did she say?)
You're looney friend just made a pass at me (slap him in the face)
Perhaps you might enjoy a cottage by the sea

So pack your toys away
Your pretty boys away
Your 45s away
Your alibis away
Your Spanish flies away
Your one-more-tries away
Your old tie-dyes away
You're moving out today

Your nasty habits ain't confined to bed (Ha Ha Ha Ha)
The grocer told me what you do with bread (what do you do?)
Why don't you take up with the baker's wife instead of me, fool!

Pack up your rubber duck
I'd like to wish you luck
Your funny cigarettes
Your sixty-one cassettes
Pack all your clothes away
Your rubber hose away
Your old-day-glos away
You're moving out today

Pack up your dirty looks
Your songs that have no hooks
Your stacks of Modern Screen
Your portrait of the Queen

Your mangy cat away
Your baby fat away
You're headed that-a-way
You're moving out today

Pack up your fork and spoon
Please leave my Lorna Doones
Your map of Mozambique
Your water bed that leaks