You Need A Thneed (the Lorax)

Oh, I got a little jingle gonna blow some mindes.
Gonna sell some thneeds.
Yaahh.

Ya everybody needs a thneed.
A fine thing that all people need.
The thneed is good.
The thneed is grate.
Ya and it's just three ninty eigh eigh eigh eigh eight.

Ya everybody needs a thneed.
It's revolutionary guaranteeeeeed.
The thneed is new.
The thneed is nice.
And did you see that priiiiice?

Since the glorious dawn of man
there's never been a thing can do what this thing can.
So listen carefullyyy
to all the wonderful things a thneed can beeee.

It's a sock. It's a suit,
boxing glove, parachute,
a butterfly net, reusable diaper,
an exercise built, a runny nose wiper,
a sling shot, a muzzle, a jump rope, a hat,
a colorful sweater you put on your cat.

Nothing else in this world can do that.
Hold young totish up in match.
Republican, independent, unitarian, or democrattttt.

But wait, there's more.
Thanks to its all natural microfibers the thneed is super aborbant.
It also works as a hat.
Course you might want to ring it out first.

Go ahead. Go ahead. Knock yourself out. Humm.
But nobodies going to buy that thing.